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Health Anxiety / OCD now accelerated after birth(6 Posts)
I've posted on this great community before about the troubles of keeping my unborn away from neighbours who smoke and in fact recently have even now had to seal the house up from smoke, as we like in a old building, some-how smoke gets in through some floor-boards.
So I sealed up with why I can, sealant kept baby largely away. But now, what scared me, as I inhaled some of the fumes (from sealant, its acetic acid given off) and thought it reasonably harmless but now I am totally destroyed thinking I harmed my 4 week old child. I'm now convinced I have OCD (I have my concerns) and have now extended this to my baby and family and fear I just cannot cope. The stress feeling and unknowing of whether I have harmed my child literally puts me into an instant depression where I cannot function, I don't eat, and am consumed with trying to prove that she (baby) is safe.
I'm pretty sure what I have is some kind of OCD around contamination, what doesn't help is my background (I originally trained as a scientist), so I'm all too familiar with the science. Basically with these kinds of events, I don't really know what to do. 2 weeks ago I was concerned about wood dust from kitchen surface after small sanding. Basically the obsession is having such an effect on my life, I've tried therapy as some have suggested on here, but I think many do not quite understand what it is I have. I reckon its OCD though, if I'm honest and I'm trying to wake up to that reality. So for those that think that OCD is about obsessive hand-washing, think again. Apparently from reading, my compulsion is the research that goes on to assure my mind that I, and now my child are safe.
Does anyone have any experience of how to get through this. I wish I was ignorant of the risks sometimes.
I think you need urgent help OP. Are you the Mum or the Dad? Just wondering as your username would suggest that you are male. If you’re the Dad, ring 111 or call the Mind Helpline. Have a read of this from apni too.
If you’re the Mum, call Pandas Foubdation, they’re open until 8pm and please speak to your GP or HV
How are you today? Did you read the info from apni? Have you spoken to your DW about how you’re feeling? Have you spoken to Mind or your GP?
The Mrs is fed up with me. She doesn't see a problem. But I still have this guilt that I've harmed my child from the silicon sealant, acetic acid. I've been researching this a lot and pretty exhausted.
Plus during the night some smoke was coming in from neighbours. I wish I was imagining it, but sadly not. Basically we've decided to leave here and move. I dont think we can accept or fix it.
I've been also trying to read up more on OCD between feeds between changing during the night.