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Please help!

(14 Posts)
Bagels2018 Thu 25-Oct-18 20:08:41

This is an odd one and I don’t know if I’m posting in the right place but my baby girl is 9 1/2 months old and after eating certain food (I think) she smells like fish the next day. So I will give her fish or eggs for tea, bath her (she doesn’t smell after bath) but the next day she’ll have a strong fishy smell for a day or 2.

I’ve obv googled it and it’s coming up with some fish Odor syndrome but has anyone else had these symptoms and it not be this syndrome? It’s in her sweat and recently, her breath but not her nappy. I’m so so worried it’s something incurable and awful. I’ve got the docs booked for tomorrow but any advice/insight would be amazing xx

OP’s posts: |
JiltedJohnsJulie Fri 26-Oct-18 17:58:10

Sorry I e not heard of this one before. What did the GP say OP? smile

Bagels2018 Fri 26-Oct-18 19:05:17

I couldn’t get her in today in the end so I’ll have to take her next week. It’s gone again now so I think it’s an intolerance to certain food. It’s egg and fish fingers so far so we’ll limit those for now and see how we get on... how random though lol

OP’s posts: |
JiltedJohnsJulie Fri 26-Oct-18 19:39:57

It’s a shame you didn’t get there today but hopefully this will bump for the evening crowd.

LifeHasGoneCrazy Sat 27-Oct-18 05:56:09

Hi everyone... my daugter has been waking up every night between hours of 10pm-12am or 2-4am for the last 10 months (at least!). She is 3.10 years old, has slept in her own room since she turned 15 months old. I have absolutely no idea why/how this all started. I have a reasonable (i think!) bedtime routine which begins with a warm bath (on alternate nights), chilling out and cuddles on the sofa while watching the 6pm CBeebies slot until 7pm, then hugging/kissing her Daddy and Little Brother goodnight, toilet & brush teeth trip, a bedtime story (or 2), switching on the relaxation/sleep music (youtube trick, most of the time I select an hour long stretch, something with mega-slow tempo, soothing, like pan flutes or piano combined with nature sounds, something you would be subjected to in a spa & massage parlour or in a meditation/yoga session, she likes to believe it's soft fairy music), her little family of 6 teddies have got to be piled on her bed in her bed in a just so fashion, she always has one boardbook to share with her teddies, her Peppa Pig torch (which BTW I absolutely hate because I have always tried to ban blue light from her bedroom, I have 1 amber light purposefully installed plus a red touch sensitive night light for her but I haven't been lucky in getting rid of the Peppa Pig torch, she goes into distraught mode without it, she has had it since birth, bought by her Daddy's/my partner's mother whom she absolutely adores). My daughter used to drink warm milk but gave it up over 1 year ago, won't drink water unless she doesn't like the juice on offer, so the unspoken agreement is at least 100ml of juice in her drinking bottle in her hand or beside her as I switch the light off, leave the room. If any detail in the bedtime routine is missing or different, trust me, she notices. Then every single night without fail, as you leave the room, the long list of demands follow - another bedtime story, more CBeebies (or worse Bing, Teletubbies or Team Umizoomi), a visit to Nanny & Grandad, more kisses and cuddles for her and/or her teddies, more juice, daylight please, i want to go swimming, ABC songs please, i want to go to the park, i don't want to sleep, i need the toilet, can we make a cake, i want my colouring/drawing books, learning to read games please, I want a Disney film, i want my fairy wings and wand, i want to go to the beach, i want to make a face mask, i want a biscuit/popcorn, i want to play football, Little Baby Bum singing and dancing please, i want to build a rocket to the moon (she's obssesed with the Solar System) etc etc... To which I have had to steal my heart and refuse - she's basically stalling the inevitable. Sometimes she starts whining or gets out of bed, tries to follow me out the room. I either escort her back to bed, calmly explaining that she must go to sleep and we can do the fun things she has asked for if she goes to sleep first. BTW this promise generally falls flat on it's face in the morning because well, life has to go on - preschool or other plans take place. Anyway, 6 times out of 10, she obeys. Other times, she hangs over her baby gate whispering as loudly as she can that she wants to go in the sitting room and watch TV. I've had to teach myself to walk off, leave her. She'll close her own door eventually when she gets no answer. With luck, 30-45mins later she is asleep. The night time drama begins as follows... either at 10pm for 2 hours it will last or at 1am for 3 hours it lasts. It starts with whimpering or softly talking herself back to sleep or she's beating he pillows, blanket and teddies back into position, comforting each item as she goes... I guess when she feels this hasn't worked then starts the full throttle crying and shouting... I go in her room, the demands begin almost immediately. I try to find out what the real reason for the tears etc, most of the time she tells me. Other times she goes off on a tangent about needing to watch Bing or the Twirly Woos or she wants to bake a cake for Grandad's birthday, build a rocket, do some painting at preschool etc etc... I take her to the toilet in the hope she is just being chatty instead of sharing her need to go and voila, full bladder empties as soon as she plonks herself on the toilet seat. I then escort her back to bed, explain why the things she wants can't happen in the middle of the night, demonstrate why we can't go out by opening the curtains a little to show her its still dark and that everyone (including her Daddy, Little Brother, Nanny & Grandad and all her preschool friends) is still asleep. Sometimes it works. Other times she bursts into tantrum-crying and i have to stay with her until she falls asleep, which is rare! By then, we have lost 2 or 3 hours of sleep, she is tired & unco-operative until her morning session at preschool school begins (where they have already noted there is a behaviour problem). Most of the time they are heroes for dealing with it and helping me stamp it out, but other times they're not so lucky. The rest of the day slides into craziness because she won't listen, stop fighting with her Little Brother, won't sleep at nap-time... the tantrum-crying starts and by 2pm she has fallen asleep from exhaustion.

Lately things have gotten worse as she's had a horrendous cough/cold for 2 weeks and her exczema came back with a vengeance, plus she contracted earrache (most of which her GP refused to acknowledge and only prescribed treatment for her long-standing skin condition). I ended up taking her to A&E for advice and they explained she's had a viral infection and all i can do wait for it to go naturally, giving her paracetamol and ibuprofen at alternate intervals for another 1 or 2 weeks.

Now I know some of you might say perhaps she suffers from nightmares/night terrors. She used to tell me whenever she'd had one - a very rare occurence. Yes she has a very active mind, she's creative and imaginative. Even after a day crammed full of activities, you could place a bet on her playing up as soon as I open her bedroom door when I investigate the middle of the night time tantrams/crying. The demands begin: more juice, toilet (if she hasn't already wet herself), cartoons/TV, a biscuit, daylight, visit to Nanny & Grandad, arts & crafts, baking, go to the park, swimming, icecream and crisps etc etc etc. Obviously I have to refuse and/or explain why not as basically as I can, being careful not to use the word NO (as all hell will break loose, trust me). She often refuses to listen, begs me stay with her, doesn't go back to sleep for hours.

Before she became ill, she was happy to go back to sleep (eventually!) alone. Now, since the first signs of coughing fit & runny nose and earrache began etc, she won't go to sleep alone, isn't so easily consoled until she is curled up on the sofa with her pillow and blanket, where she often passes out instantly.

Her Daddy/my partner is not impressed by all if this. 3 nights out of 10 he'll do this nightly duty of pandering to our daughter's night-time tantrums. He is a little bit abrupt and plainly spoken with her, switches on all the lights, slams bedroom doors and baby gates, instead of being calm and ushering her back to bed, he takes her to the sitting room every single time and 2hrs later I still hear him loudly repeating you should be asleep - he is very easily pissed off when his sleep in interrupted. The morning after is not pretty. He loudly protests how much sleep he has missed out on. He conveniently forgets that (if I am not already on soothing daughter duty), I am awake most nights working hard so all the disturbances don't affect our son too much - he is 20months old. He has been very recently diagnosed with bronchilitus after spending 12hrs in the A&E department on oxygen.

The going to bed routine with my daughter wasn't always this difficult. 10 months ago it used to be quick, quiet, she was grateful to go and would sleep 10hrs straight. These days I am so exhausted in trying to help her, often crying myself to sleep when she is finally out for the count. My GP is not interested in helping, he has only suggested try putting her to bed a bit later and give her warm milk. It didn't work. I am flat out of ideas now and running on empty, at the end of my nerves here...

Any advice please?? I'm desperate!

Thanks for your time x

JiltedJohnsJulie Sat 27-Oct-18 08:22:42

LifeHas you might be better starting your own thread, but I’ll try to answer you.

You say that Nursery have mentioned sone behavioural problems, can you tell us what’s goibg on there? Have Nursery suggested anything for these behavioural problems? How’s her speech too?

You mention her having a nap. What time does she go to bed and get up and how long is she napping for?

Does she eat well too?

LifeHasGoneCrazy Sat 27-Oct-18 21:03:23

Thankyou for replying JiltedJohnsJulie.

I am new to mumsnet, still trying to figure it out. I am more than grateful that you've replied, trust me.

My daughter's new preschool have noticed tantrum behaviour - she lies flat on the floor when it's time to go back inside after garden time (she loves it), she'll refuse to do some craft activities (she has said to them she prefers to make hats, masks etc with me) she won't listen to or follow simple instructions, like removing her bag+coat+shoes when she starts her the morning session, she doesnt always sit still for registration and singing time, she won't share toys and when she decides she has had enough of someone, she'll give them a shove or a slap on their arm or face of they stood too close! I was mortified when they shared this information... After 1 meeting I came up with the idea of keeping a behaviout record so the teachers and I can swap info on her behaviour on certain days or during certain activities. Together we have noticed a pattern... on nights when she doesn't sleep her usual 10hours she is very uncooperative. They have suggested using Time Out, don't use the words no or naughty because she doesn't like them, using more rewards/stickers etc to praise good behaviour, that I collect her early if she is clearly getting tired and increasingly stroppy, and on top of all this they are applying for support from SENDCO. Some their suggestions are working - daughter has progresed from the Time Out chair to sitting on the Circle Time carpet with a book when she feels she wants time to herself, she now enjoys sharing games (tea parties with at least 2 other children plus their favourite teddies), she likes some arts and crafts but only if it's painting, glitter work or play-do - she deliberately chooses to do things she doesn't do at home, which is bad i suppose. She's had a few 'Well done' cards and stickers for outstanding days. It's taken 7 weeks to get this far, which is a relief of sorts.
After 6 months at her old preschool (where she exhibited the same stroppy behaviour) the staff decided they couldn't cope without SENDCO and referred her for autism and hearing tests... their unspoken fears spoke loudest, they didnt share the fact they made these referrrals until I received requests to attend various appointments with my daughter! A play psychiatrist and audio-ologist concluded they found nothing of concern... I removed her from that preschool in the end.

The Nursery Teachers at her new preschool have not highlighted her speech as a major concern as yet. I was so worried that they would when I enrolled her there - when she is super excited or upset about something, she gets very muddled, tries spewing out a million words per second, i don't know why she rushes... but then again, more often than not, she speaks very clearly and her Nursery Teachers have commented on her being very bright and clever, always will to share and show off her basic literacy and numeracy skills knowledge.

Nap time is a sore subject, simply because she doesn't always want to play ball, even when she is feeling drained and she knows she is. It doesn't happen everyday, admittedly. I can't seem to stomach the tantrums, screaming and crying for an 20 minutes before she finally quietens down and sleep. Most days I aim for nap-time after her midday meal about 1:30pm and ideally, I would like her to sleep for 1-1.5hrs. At 3pm (ish) when I go to wake her, she doesn't want to get up and is a little snappy at first, so I leave her follow me into the sitting room when she's ready. She doesn't always, sometimes she stays in her room and plays picnic with her dolls which is nice, or she asks if she can watch a Disney film. In one way this is good - i get more undivided time with her Little Brother. But then when I ask daughter to pack away her toys to get ready for an arts & craft project, or to do some baking, or going out the shop or park, or for some other a social activity (like visiting family or receiving visitors friends and), she'll scream the place down... I try to keep things easy and fun, because these are things she likes to do anyway, she frequently asks to do them regardless of the time of day or where we are etc. She'll scream the house down especially if she is not ready to tidy her toys, asks for her favourite cartoons instead (in fact she'll ask at any opportunity she gets).

My daughter's screaming etc upsets her Little Brother and he'll either cry or he starts throwing his toys around in frustration. Days like these I have to resort to Time Out and distraction techniques quite a bit. I guess my daughter doesn't like not having a lot of notice, i don't know.

She was always well behaved before started preschool... quiet, polite, obedient. She didn't really have a terrible 2's phase. I am worried she's having it now at 3.10 years old.

Food? She loves it. Eats all of her fruit and veg, adores pasta dishes and traditional Sunday dinners. There's nothing she won't eat apart from spicy or highly perfumed foods, shellfish, mangos, jelly and jam!

Thanks again for your time JJJ.

JiltedJohnsJulie Sat 27-Oct-18 21:21:22

If she does nap, does she sleep better at night? Have you tried No Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers & Preschoolers?

If her speech is generally good but garbled at times, I think it’s worth getting a referral to SALT. You can self refer in many areas. My DD needed speech therapy and I really wish I’d got it sorted before school started. I think I thought that it would sort itself out, but it just didn’t.

Can I ask what a play psychiatrist is and what their qualifications were? I’ve never heard this term before.

LifeHasGoneCrazy Sat 27-Oct-18 21:57:41

I haven't tried the No Cry Sleep Solution but I will read up on it and build into to both my children's bedtime routine. Thanks for suggestion!

I made a referral to SALT around 5 months ago and was told straightaway the waiting time is can be as little as a few weeks or as long as 18 months! About 3 weeks ago, I made telephone enquiries in regards to my daughter's SALT referral and they said they closed the 'case' due to lack of paperwork! I know I sent it in and scanned it into an email, which they then said must have been lost! So i have applied again, as yet I haven't received a reply.

Sorry... typo error. The doctor who observed my daughter and carried out a series of tests and child-led activities for her to play with and complete, she explained she specialises in Child Development and Play Psychology. She concluded my daughter is not exhibiting any major signs of autism or any other concerning behaviour, but would follow-up as she said the early detection of autism in girls at the lower end of the spectrum can be quite delayed compared to boys. She never followed up.

My daughter's new preschool are currently pushing a SENDCO referral for behaviour management, hopefully we will find more help too.

JiltedJohnsJulie Sun 28-Oct-18 07:33:26

It’s interesting that the person who observed your DD says there was no signs of Autism as from your posts, she seems to me to be displaying quite a few. It can present very differently in girls but things like her speech, sleep and anxiety/unwillingness to move from one activity to another, both at home and at nursery and tantrums can all be signs. I’m not trained though and sone of these can be normal 3 year old behaviour. If 2 nurseries have picked up on it and you’re concerned enough to postcon here, I suspect it’s a little more than normal preschool behaviour.

I’d forget about the original assessment she had, especially as the person who assesssed your DD hadn’t followed up.

I’d book into the GP tomorrow and ask for a referral to get her assessed for ASD and also ask for a referral to SALT. If you can, take DH with you. For sone bizarre reason, GOs always take more notice if Dad bothers to turn up to the appointment.

JiltedJohnsJulie Sun 28-Oct-18 08:51:57

There’s some more information on ASD in Girls here. The anxiety over strict routines seems trike it could apply to your DD and sleep.

It might also be worth posting in SN Chat to see if the lovely MNers in that section have any suggestions to help with sleep and what they suggest with regards to getting your DD assessed for ASD.

If it was me, I’d be starting the process now, before she gets to school age thanks

LifeHasGoneCrazy Sun 28-Oct-18 10:37:41

Thankyou so much for all your advice JJJ, I'll try everything that you have suggested and also get updates from herr current school about their referral to SALT. They have heard nothing in 6 weeks and I haven't heard anything from their Speech & Language Dept in the 2 weeks since i sent my own referral... maybe i am just being impatient but it's getting ridiculous now. She is due to start reception in September 2019 and she needs support of some kinf, and i hate not knowing what it's the matter (if indeed there is something!).

JiltedJohnsJulie Sun 28-Oct-18 10:51:21

Would paying privately for a SALT assessment be an option?

JiltedJohnsJulie Tue 30-Oct-18 16:55:18

LifeHas I’ve just though of another book that may help you all, it’s called The Explosive Child. Have look and see what you think smile

@Bagels2018 how’s youre DD doing? Have you managed to get to the GP yet? smile

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