Difficult toddler behaviour

(4 Posts)
deptfordgirl Thu 20-Sep-18 11:15:26

My ds is 2.5yrs and has started to push and try to spit at other children. We just had to leave toddler group because he pushed a younger child over and her mum was understandably upset. I try to keep an eye on him at all times but I also have a 6 month old. He also tries to push her and knock her over. It is usually because the child takes a toy he has or wants. Do I just keep him away from groups? Really don't want to become housebound as playgroups are the only thing which keep me sane at the moment. A few people have mentioned star charts or taking toys away. Would this work?not sure how best to tackle it. I make him say sorry to the child or his sister and follow through on threats,e.g. to leave the group, but not sure what to do for the best. Really don't want it to escalate.

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sleepismysuperpower1 Thu 20-Sep-18 18:43:56

you could try a chart system. when he is naughty or pushes someone over, give him a big cross on a chart like this: azserver.info/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/reward-chart-template-for-best-good-behaviour.jpg and explain clearly to him that everytime he does pushes someone, he gets a cross. 3 crosses mean that he loses a toy, or has to go into timeout for 5 minutes. no guarentees it will work but it may be worth a try. all the best x

Liskee Fri 21-Sep-18 11:54:10

It's a phase. Everything is a phase. He will stop doing it in a few weeks or months, and then time will pass and just when you think it's stopped forever, it'll start up again. It's also perfectly normal.

BUT that doesn't mean it's okay, and that you are going to let him away with it! I think the key is consistency. Every time it happens repeat the same message of how it is not okay, make sure he says sorry to whomever has been hurt, and if you think it appropriate, choose a sanction. That can be whatever you choose. I know some people say don't use food as a sanction, but I tend to go with no after dinner treat.

I read a post somewhere on Facebook (I know, I'm sorry, so vague) that said it helps to remember that part of a child's development is to misbehave before they learn to behave. As his parent you are not here to fix him, but to help him learn the correct behaviour for any given circumstance. Every time he misbehaves, it's a new point of learning. That helps a little bit when we're saying sorry for the 100th time and I'm leaving the tots group with my head down again.

deptfordgirl Fri 21-Sep-18 12:26:49

Okay thank you,I'll try that. It's a tricky age as am not sure how much he understands. He always says sorry straight away but then does it again. Not even sure where he's seen the spitting.

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