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Firstly, you aren't doing anything wrong.
When you go for your diagnosis meeting (or contact them beforehand if you can) as to be referred to a sleep clinic. There are specialists who can help.
This Early Support Document on sleep might help.
Children with autism, usually have sensory differences. See if you can get a referral to an OT (Occupational Therapist) who specialises in this.
Or it may be that your authority have staff who can do a sensory assessment with you (as OTs are in short supply).
Does your dd attend Nursery ? Ask them to ask for support from whoever it is in your Authority who support U5s with Autism (this varies one area to the next, but might be an Autism Team worker or might be an Area SENCo or Inclusion Officer).
If she doesn't attend Nursery, ask (at the CDC and if you have a Children's Cetnre, and ask your HV) for a referral to the U%s support Team (again called different things and all operate slightly differently) - it might be portage but might be another name.
This is a fabulous book about sensory processing, and gives practical ideas.
My daughter is such hard work I'm not sure what to do or how i will cope with her as she gets older she is only 22 months but has autism I'm just awaiting diagnosis from child development team ect.. It's been a nightmare she woke last night at 1am and stayed awake all night till 1pm today then nap for only 2 hours and she is still awake now I'm shattered she spent most of today hitting scratching screaming at me she gets so frustrated all time i am feeling so worn out and not sure how to help her or what I'm doing wrong? Anyone got any advice on this