At the end of my tether with 10yr old

[doesthisnamelookgoodonme]

Called in my 10yr olds school at the end of the day for the second time this week due to his behaviour. Today he was nearly sent home he was so bad. What am I supposed to do? He literally flies off the handle with everything and everyone. I’ve had him referred to CAMHS three times, twice they refused to see him, he had an assessment recently and they’ve deemed there to be no issues. The only thing they are doing is referring him for bereavement counselling to do with losing my Nan. We’ve tried talking to him, he just says he hasn’t done anything and everyone is lying, will accuse his teacher of lying in front of me and the teacher. He’s had all privileges taken away, no tv no phone no xbox, it has no effect. We stopped him going to drama school which is his one love, hasn’t bothered him at all. School tell me they are going to refer him for one thing or another and never do. I am literally at the end of my tether

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

What do the school say he has done this week OP and how is his behaviour at home?

Is he in year 6 and about to go to High School?

[Witchend]

Is this a new thing or something that's been gradually getting worse?

[doesthisnamelookgoodonme]

Shouting out in class, disrupting the lesson and when told to stop and to behave he just loses it and reacts badly. This behaviour has gone on for a while, but he goes through stages of good behaviour with just the odd niggle x

[doesthisnamelookgoodonme]

Sorry he's in year 5 going to year 6 this year x

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

Has it been going on since before last September? Just wondering if it could be a clash of personalities with his teacher? Has the school SENCO assessed him and have they got any kind of plan in place to address his behaviour?

How is he at home OP? Is he eating and sleeping well? Does he get plenty of exercise? Have you tried limiting screen time?

[doesthisnamelookgoodonme]

It's been going on for a long time, long before this teacher. No involvement from SENCO but had assessment with CAMHS forced by me and they deemed to be no issues and just referred him for some bereavement counselling. No behavioural Plan in place but after speaking to them this morning g things seem to be moving

Behaviour at home is very much the same. He accuses everyone of lying when he himself is unable to tell the truth. He eats well and sleeps well. Have limited screen time. No effect :(

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

I’m surprised to be honest that he hasn’t been observed by SENCO and the school don’t have a plan in place. I’d be asking for this and also asking why it hasn’t been done before.

With how long it’s been going on for though, if he was my child, I’d be booking an appointment with GP, without DS being there, and ask if he coukd be referred to a Paeditrician for assessment.

[doesthisnamelookgoodonme]

@JiltedJohnsJulie I don't have any knowledge of what should happen so maybe my fault I haven't pushed more. I've been in school countless times though and they've told me certain things will happen but they haven't

I went to the GP about my son and they just referred me to CAMHS. School said I needed to do it as it was better coming from me?

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

I’m not very experienced in how it works, and hopefully someone will be along soon who knows more.

If it was me though, I’d go back to the GP and say that you would like him assessed by a Paeditrician. There may be a reason he is behaving this way.

In the meantime Family Lives have a Helpline a Helpline you could call and you might find this book helpful

[doesthisnamelookgoodonme]

Thank you @JiltedJohnsJulie that's really helpful x