Extreme Behavioural Problems - 8 Year Old

[Dondi86]

For the last 6 months or so, my daughter's behavioural problems have become unbearable and I do not know where to turn. I have taken her to the doctors, who promised a referral, but I have still heard nothing. I have read every webpage and watched every video, but nothing works.

If I touch something (anything) she has to scratch it and shouts at me for touching it. If I touch her, she has to rub herself on a wall and screams at me for 'hurting' her. Her biggest issue is how I talk. I promise that I do not talk like an absolute moron, but she makes me feel like I do - It's just simple words like "yeah" instead of "yes" or even if I make a noise (sigh, yawn, or make silly noises to my baby). Any word I say that ends in a 't' or a 'd' she has to repeat that word over and over, telling me she doesn't understand what it means because I have said it wrong (to be clear though, she DOES understand what word I said). She ends up crying, stamping her feet, screaming, swearing and hitting me. I cannot remember the last time I said a sentence without her behaving this way.

Reading the above, you might think some of her behaviour sounds like OCD or autism, however I do not believe this to be the case, purely because she absolutely does not behave this way with anyone else, just me. If it were autism, surely she wouldn't be able to control it and would be like it with everyone??

I don't know if anyone has experienced anything like this?

[aboutasd]

Hi, my understanding of autism in girls is they can be very good at masking behaviour to others and it builds up hence the explosion of behaviour once she is home with you. It may well not be autism but I would look at 'autism in girls' rather than just autism as it can be very different. Good luck xx

[Kleinzeit]

Has she always had these kinds of problems in a milder form, or are they totally new? If she's always had some tendencies then she might have some sensory sensitivities which come out more strongly at home with you where she needs to feel "safe". Also how old is your baby - she seems to have a huge need to control you and it got much worse about 6 months ago, so might she have a lot of anxiety to do with her new sibling?

[Donhill]

I don’t think the fact that she doesn’t do it with anyone else means it can’t be ocd. The compulsions caused by ocd can be very specific to people or places. While you wait for the doctor’s referral is it worth reading some books about ocd and how to help with that? In my experience ocd is all about control and anxiety and knowing more about ocd and techniques for helping with ocd and anxiety might give you other things to try.