Swimming lesson refusal - both kids!!

[Hermagsjesty]

My DD (6) is in Stage 2 at swimming. She’s okay the actual swimming but HATES jumping in and is not keen on having her face in at all. She’s always been reluctant to jump in but has changed teacher recently and is now point blank refusing to do it - and it’s starting to make her generally unconfident in the water. Her brother (4) started swimming 4 weeks ago in Stage 1. 1st week did great including jumping in. 2nd week swam well but refused to jump in. Last week got out half way through lesson. This week refused to get in at all. Then, she followed suit and got out half way through her lesson (which she’s never done before). I’ve acknowledged my DD in particular is nervous and tried rewards for trying hard but it seems to be getting worse. This week I lost my temper and got cross with them both over it - which didn’t feel like a helpful reaction. What would you do?!

[Mysa74]

I'd probably just ask my 6yo DD, she might be a bit reluctant to talk at first but by the end of a 1-2-1 she usually lets me know what she's worried about or why she's reluctant to do something. I then do my best to explain why things need to be done or we work out how to fix a problem together. It might be a little thing or sometimes it's completely unrelated to what the original problem seemed to be... Maybe she just misses the old teacher or is picking up on your 4yo's actions...Good luck, hope this one's easy!
Ps: can completely empathise with the whole face in water thing, I hate it!

[Hermagsjesty]

Thank you! Me and my DD has a good chat at bedtime and she said some other kids were calling her a baby for not jumping in and that’s why she got out. Which explains today. But doesn’t solve the jumping in... I’m wondering if she might benefit from a stint of 1 on 1 lessons to build her confidence a bit...

[Mysa74]

Your poor DD, children can be really mean sometimes can't they? I'm glad you managed to talk to her and find out :-)
1-21-1 sounds like a good idea, the 5 day holiday courses are also good. My DD responded really well Tova half hour session every morning one half term, she came on in leaps and bounds and met lots of a children she'd never seen before :-)
or maybe if you (or a friend/family member who's water confident) go to the pool for a fun session with both children and maybe a friend who likes water? You could get some of the seal sticks and a rubber ring and just play? seal sticks are great, they're bits of rubber with weights in that sink to the bottom of the pool, but stand upright so they're easier to grab... My DD loves to play fetch now, lol.
Give her some options, see what she thinks. Tell her to choose a way to improve and beat the bullies!
Good luck!

[Hermagsjesty]

I’ll look into the 5 day courses - thank you. I think little and often might be a good way forward for her... and yes, a swimming just for fun session as a family is a good idea, I think we’ve let the lessons take over a bit

[Mysa74]

Good luck!