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Behaviour/development

Leaving almost 2 year old to "cry it out" at bedtime

11 replies

SamanthaH92 · 06/05/2018 19:34

My DD is nearly 2 years old. Always been a good sleeper but now all of a sudden won't go to bed. As soon as i say its bed time which is between 6 and 7pm we have full on melt downs. As soon as we enter her room she's screaming, kicking and hitting. We've left her to cry it out the last 3 to 4 nights and after 20 minutes of on off crying she is normally flat out. Tonight though she just is not giving in and us going in to her room to calm her down just makes it worse. She is so tired but like i say not giving in. Is there a point where you just give up and bring them back down? I feel abserloutly awful. But she is to big and heavy now for us to try and rock her.

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Rainatnight · 07/05/2018 10:17

Our DD is nearly 2 and definitely has become more ambivalent about bed times lately!

If she won't settle, and is upset, then we do a variation of the shush-pat that you do for a baby - so going in and saying 'it's ok, time to sleep' several times so she knows she's not on her own, but nor is it time to get up and party.

If she's very upset, then it's a bit of a judgement call about whether she's just tired and needs to be left to settle (and is going in just distracts her, as you say) or whether she needs to be picked up. If it's the latter, then we do rock her (our backs!) or take her into our room to lie down and calm down. But NEVER back downstairs, cos we don't want to make any connection between playing up and bedtime and getting to properly get up again.

I don't know if any of this helps. We're just making it up as we go along obviously! I think it's such a funny age, and they can get randomly fearful and sensitive.

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SamanthaH92 · 07/05/2018 10:43

Yeah i ended up taking her in to our bed for a cuddle and she was asleep within seconds!! I don't want to put her in to a bed yet and not sure if she is ready too x

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Rainatnight · 10/05/2018 20:40

We're not doing a bed yet, and aren't even thinking about it, TBH. She moves around SO much in her sleep, I can't see her not falling out at this stage. And she's generally a really good sleeper, apart from this bedtime carry on!

Speaking of which, we've had a few really bad nights of it, so all advice gratefully appreciated!

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SamanthaH92 · 10/05/2018 20:56

We've only had one night where she has fallen asleep within minutes. It was an hour battle tonight and when i just got her to sleep, next door woke her up 😔 xx

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Rainatnight · 10/05/2018 21:19

Oh no, poor you! I hope you have Wine

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SamanthaH92 · 10/05/2018 21:28

I'm pregnant so no wine! I don't like wine anyways lol, i prefer a red stag. She's asleep now. Have you cut out naps? X

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Rainatnight · 10/05/2018 21:40

Nooooo! We get a solid nap in the middle of the day and I want it to go on for as long as possible Grin And she does really need it.

Congrats on your pregnancy!

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SamanthaH92 · 10/05/2018 21:43

Thank you. Not long and she will be here 😊. Oh its a battle even for a nap now but the tired tantrums are worse so i do try get her to have one but try aim for no longer than half an hour xx

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Rainatnight · 10/05/2018 21:47

D'you think she'd sleep longer if you let her, at nap time? I only ask cos some people say they can be difficult at bedtime if they're over-tired.

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SamanthaH92 · 10/05/2018 21:55

She would defiently sleep longer but if she did she would not go to bed till 11pm +. She constantly fights it whether she is tired or not x

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Rainatnight · 10/05/2018 22:31

That's so difficult!

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