28yr old son, still lying...

[Frances53]

I need advice re 28yr old son who is still lying to me, this time about sending his sister a bday present. Stupid lie, but I don't know what to do about it. It's like he doesn't want to disappoint her/ us, but still doesn't seem to realise that lying about something like this is much worse than just sending her a text and saying he's been too busy to get a present together. He lied throughout his youth, but I thought he had stopped. He had troubled teenage years and failed at uni - but now has a job he loves and is very good at as a pre-school practitioner in a nursery. At what point do you think it's just his business and I shouldn't get involved as his mum?

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

I think now is the time to not get involved OP. I know you’re probably disappointed with the lying but he is an adult.

Have you asked him why he lied?

[Frances53]

I’m new here - what does OP mean? Yup, it’s disappointing he lies. But no, I haven’t asked him why he does. Good point. Maybe I should. Thank you.

[AddictiveCereal]

He's 28 so you need to step back and let him live his life. Its no longer your place to deal with things like this as he is an adult.

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

Sorry it’s original poster. There’s a list of acronyms here

[Frances53]

Wise and helpful words, thank you.

[hilbobaggins]

I’m 50, and I occasionally lie. Don’t you? We all need to try to do better, I guess.

To me this seems like normal human behaviour. Leave it, move on and focus on your own life.