Dd isn't adapting well to ds

[Twounder1]

My dd is a year old this month and I gave birth to ds 2 days ago. It's still early days, I know this, but since we've been home she just has been a completely different little girl.
All be it I know her life has been turned upside down and she's not too used to other children but she won't stop screaming and hasn't since we bought him home yesterday morning. This isn't like her at all. As soon as myself or dp have him, she will scream at us until we put him back in his moses. She's very curious of him and we are trying to introduce them slowly as she has a habit of poking/slapping but I'm worried she just won't take to him at all.
Im breast feeding him so the demand for that is constant (he was a big baby) and I'm m trying to make one to one for her a lot but it doesn't seem good enough. I just want to make her happy.
He's really good for sleep, he isn't fussy at all really. He just likes to be cuddled into me a lot but my dd just is really unhappy.

Any advice?

[coffeecupplease]

I think it might be a bad idea to ‘introduce them slowly’, if you are not letting her see / touch him etc. She is probably feeling left out and that there’s this thing more precious than her you are keeping from her.

I’d just get on with it. I’m sure he will survive! I’d try not to make a big deal of the new baby and get on with life as normally as possible. Hopefully she will get used to the new baby soon.

Good luck! Two very young babies you got there!

[corythatwas]

Congratulations on your new baby! And do remember, it's early days yet.

When I had my ds, dd was 3 1/2 and it took her a couple of months to settle. She would be very excited about her little brother one minute and throw things at his head or try to pull his arm off the next. The first few weeks I was on constant alert, didn't even go to the loo without shutting him in our room (with a hook she couldn't reach) and taking her.

But gradually, things got better, she got used to him, I started to relax. By the time he was two, I would sometimes come in late at night and find them curled up together in her bed. By the time they were teenagers, they were each other's confidantes and knew a lot more about each other than I did about either of them.

One thing that really helped me over the first few weeks was just having them together in my bed and talking to her. We made up a game where the bed became a car and little brother was the driver and he took us off wherever we wanted to go.

My mother had me and my brother at a 16 mth interval; she said she used to sit and read to me while she was breastfeeding and basically direct all the attention towards me. I get on well with my brother, though I did once, apparently, break a Santa doll against his head.