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worried about 20 month old - autism, development delay??

(6 Posts)
lovingmumhood Wed 04-Apr-18 14:16:20

Wondering if someone can give me some stories of similar situation. Recently, family members have been commenting on my son (20 months) with concerns and I am a little concerned too. There seem to be some signs of autism/problems but then other signs aren't there. I should mention, the time around which these problems started was about six weeks ago (after he had finished having severe bout of rotavirus for two weeks).

He had started to get more words.. he said hello, bye bye, ta, yeah, no, go, ball, moo, more, paw, dog, mama, dada, oh oh etc now he literally doesn't talk. He still does a noise for yeah with a sort of nod when you offer him something and makes noises/babbles a bit but has stopped saying the words.
He cuddles me all the time and his dad, he also sometimes randomly cuddles other family but doesn't like it when people proactively approach him for one. He also gives us kisses and high fives, but not always.
He smiles at us alot and holds eye contact with us well, likes to giggle and tickle etc, he plays with his toys alot.
He doesn't interact much with other kids, only if they are very tentative.
He HATED baby group the last few times we've been, he clings on to us for dear life and cries if we let go. It is a loud and boisterous environment.
He loves being read to and understands things like breakfast, lunch, dinner, milk, dummy, cuddle, bedtime, bathtime and if you ask him to get something or show him what you want him to do he will do it.
He never points to things though, only reaches a hand up to it and shows no interest in flash cards or other ways to learn words and doesn't understand words like colours.

I go through bouts of feeling like I've failed him as a mother, seeing other kids and thinking he's so behind in certain ways, worrying there's something wrong and then thinking he's just his own person.

Not sure what to do sad Mum thought maybe there'd be a problem with his hearing (we have about a 70 percent success rate for him responding to his name) from an ear infection with the rotavirus as the changes have been very noticeably from around that time.

It might also be worth nothing his brother started crawling around tha time too (he's seven months old) and he goes through little times where he shares a toy or something, but often gets very irritated when his brother crawls into his space. He also pushes people away if they get close to his face and stuff uninvited. To be fair, so would I! Constant comments from family have made me a ball
of worry.

He's very sweet and affectionate to me and his dad, he's clever figuring things out and he's very sweet and gentle with animals. He doesn't really like being outside unless the weather is mild and his favourite toys are anything musical and with lights.

Not sure what other info is relevant.

OP’s posts: |
AjasLipstick Wed 04-Apr-18 14:32:39

Definitely get his hearing checked. That's the first port of call.

When you describe him, he has a few red flags but as with many children, they could all be put down to normal toddler behaviour...however, because you have concerns, it's ALWAYS better to check and see sooner rather than later.

You could ask your doctor for a referral to get him assessed and the sooner the better as waiting lists can be very long.

Better to ask now and then get to 4 and school round the corner and find out he's fine...than to not ask and then have to wait once he's starting school.

That's a link to the MCHAT questionnaire which is designed to see if your worry is warranted but it's important to remember that it's not a diagnostic tool.

AjasLipstick Wed 04-Apr-18 14:33:32

Does he pretend play OP? Like...drink from a pretend cup or offer you things? Bring you toys to play with with him?

lovingmumhood Wed 04-Apr-18 14:37:14

not really, not that I can think of. He likes playing with his bath toys, pouring the bowl of water out, pulling out kitchen stuff, stirring stuff and all his light and music toys.

He also does copy us like he likes to use the dustpan and brush after he sees us do it.

Never really done proper pretend play though no :/

OP’s posts: |
lovingmumhood Wed 04-Apr-18 14:41:57

I just started the questionnaire.. he does pretend play a bit.. he cuddles his stuffed animals and babbles on the phone sometimes, though he does that less than he used to, he prefers to press the buttons now

OP’s posts: |
AjasLipstick Wed 04-Apr-18 23:08:27

From what you're saying OP it just seems as if he's got slightly delayed speech but of course I'm no expert. Have you got a decent HV? If not go to the GP and ask about a referral.

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