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3yo throwing tantrums when I'm with other adults

(3 Posts)
BelfastSmile Thu 21-Dec-17 15:11:31

DS is 3y4m. We also have DD, 9m. I'm a SAHP, so with DS most of the time, though he also goes to Playgroup 2 mornings a week (and enjoys it).

He is great when he's with me and DD. He's great when he's with DH. He's great when he's with my mum. However, if he's with me and DH, or me and my mum, he whines, tantrums, refuses to do what he's told - basically anything he can do to be awkward.

My guess is that it's an attention-seeking thing - he doesn't like me being with other adults, and talking to them instead of him.

I just don't know what to do, though. Any family trip out is tiring, as he constantly whines, pulls my hand, and refuses to cooperate. It's worse if he's tired or hungry, but can happen any time.

Any suggestions?

OP’s posts: |
BrokenBattleDroid Thu 21-Dec-17 17:29:36

Oh gosh, it's such a pain in the arse age isn't (also lovely for many other reasons, but still...)?

I would practice having very short periods with adults and have a sticker chart. Tell him you're going to start doing sticker rewards for playing nicely when you are with grown-ups and let him choose some stickers.

Plan a 2/3min conversation or something with DH/DM. Before it starts, get down on his level and explain that you will be busy for a few minutes and you need him to behave nicely - and just think, he can get his first sticker if he does! Loads of praise and high fives if he manages it. Then rinse and repeat with gradually increasing times. Pretty dull for you until it's done, but if you can break his cycle then it'll become so much easier.

Also, save treats, activity books, ipad, cheap little toys etc for when you really need him to be quiet!

BelfastSmile Thu 21-Dec-17 19:22:00

Thanks, @BrokenBattleDroid. Yeah, he's lovely and adorable most of the time, but then SO frustrating as well! He doesn't really play well by himself- always wants DH or me to play with him (usually me, but DH will do if I'm not around!). Just seems to constantly want attention.

The sticker chart is a good idea - he loves stickers! I'll take him out after Christmas to choose some stickers, I think.

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