9 month old waking at night.....help needed!!(19 Posts)
My dd is nearly 9 months old, and up until 7 months slept 12 hour nghts almost without exception from 3 months. How smug was I....too smug!! Since then she has not slept through once, and it is quietly driving dh and I mad. I am tired and tearful, and at a complete loss as to what to do. She goes down beautifully, awake and settles herself, and stays that way until about 11pm, and then all hell breaks loose! She starts to stir, I leave her for a bit, she doesn't sttle so I go in and reassure her and then she gets more and more worked up until she's beside herself. If I pick her up and cuddle her, she falls asleep on me, put her down and we start all over again. This went on for an hour and a half last night, and then she did it again 2 hours later, and then she was still awake at 6am! I give a baby rice before her last bottle to elimnate hunger, and I know it could be teeth but not every night surely? I have tried leaving her to cry, but I can't leave her for more than 10 minutes, by which point she is totally worked up.
Can anyone suggest anything? I know babies go through phases, but for this long? Plus, she used to be such a good sleeper that I don't know where we've gone wrong. I know it could be a habit, but how do I put it right without leaving her to cry?
Even if nobody helps, this rant has relieved some of my tension!!
Had a similar experience with DS, found I was not producing enough milk so switched to bottled at 9 months, put him in a sleepbag to stop him from wiggling so much as he had started to pull himself up, it also helped to put a night light in his room for comfort, weaned him off this once he started sleeping well. hope this helps, best of luck!
Thanks fatmomma! Unfortunately I am already doing the things you have suggested, but we shall persevere for another night!
lauren, is she turning over and having problems getting back or getting stuck, or banging on the bars? Do you have a bumper? What's her sleep like in the day? Has something else changed in her life - new nursery or anything?
Sorry no answers, just wondering if there's anything that could be setting this off.
Thanks clairemow. She has become a lot more mobile in her cot of late, and I think it probably does stress her a bit. We haven't got bumpers, as I wasn't sure if they're recommended or not. She has a sleep in the morning, about 9am, for just over an hour, and then another nap sometime in the afternoon for approx 45 mins. She always has the morning one in her cot, with no resistance. I've lowered the cot base today, as she is beginning to pull up on the top rail, so maybe that might help. Thankyou for your suggestions.
it was just that I remember DS1 going through a phase of disturbed sleep around that age. I think it's quite common around 8/9 months, when babies are starting to get mobile, trying to pull up on things etc. instead of lying down all nice and still! It isn't a problem if she turns over to sleep on her front, but is a problem if she turns, wants to get back, and then can't, or stands up and then can't lie back down. We used to have to go into DS1, help him lie back down etc. Never turned the lights on or spoke in more than a whisper while we were doing it. But he didn't cry for ages after, so I don't have first hand experience of that. sorry .
Having said that, have you tried stroking her tummy/head rather than picking her up, and singing a lullaby really softly? Might not work straight away, but has worked for some people I know. Or picking her up for a cuddle, and as soon as she stops crying, putting her back and quietly saying sleepy time now, or whatever, giving her a kiss and retreating slowly? you might have to pick her up quite a few times the first few times you do it, but over a few nights it might improve? Again, I haven't had to do this myself, but have read about it.
Hope your night is better tonight...
Lauren - just wanted to let you know that my DS is the same!
He is just over 9 months and was a fantastic sleeper until a week ago - would sleep anywhere, through anything.
Now, although it doesn't sound anywhere near as bad as your DS, he does wake up crying once or twice a night and won't settle with a dummy (which always used to work) and we end up bringing him into our bed where he settles easily - then take him back to his cot where he might stay asleep for another 2-3 hours then it all starts again.
He has got his first 2 teeth coming through so I am hoping that it is connected to that - I am still getting a reasonable amount of sleep but it is a shock to the system after having a fantastic sleeper, pretty much from birth.
Not much help but wanted to let you know you are not alone.
Thanks again! Your suggestions are very valid, as I think we are guilty of over tending to her, or rather picking her up instead of trying to settle her in the cot. I will try to to do that for longer tonight, and see if the pick up, put down will work. Other people's opinions are so helpful, as sometimes I can't see the wood for the trees, particluarly at one in the morning! If I have success you'll be the first to know!
lauren, try the pick up put down, or whatever method you decide on, for at least a week before you decide it isn't working... IME, these things usually take 3 or 4 days. Good luck.
have you tried putting a toy in the cot with her, our ds finds this good.
My ds goes to bed fine but has varied nights regarding waking up, its normally at least once. He is nearly 9 months and has just cut his first tooth which I think has affected his sleeping pattern. I know its no consolation but there is many of us in the same situation!
6 weeks ago dd then age 71/2 months, started with this, crying for hours on end all night.
After a week of this I was at screaming point, and didn't know what to do. She was keeping whole house awake, and ds had to miss school one day, as he was too tired to go. That morning he went back to bed and slept until one pm.
I phoned HV who suggested Controlled crying. Felt that was too mean, but after ANOTHER night of no sleep, tried a modified version, and it worked. Took about 3 nights.
I would go into her, and settle her at first cry, then wait one minute and go back. Then one and a half minutes, then two minutes etc.
Those nights sat in the stairwell counting of the seconds were awful, but it did work.
I was totally against cc but was so desperate. Had tried taking her in bed with us, but to her that was like a long soft play session with lots of things to poke and giggle at <tired sigh>
Unfortunately it started again last night, but did same thing.......
Counting seconds bleary with sleep whilst staring at stain in carpet is possibly the worst thing in the world.........
Also was big fan of pick up/put down, but she was too damn heavy to keep doing it..
It is comforting to know I am not the only frustrated mummy up in the wee hours! She does have a toy, a soft, no noise one, but it makes no difference. I am preparing for the night ahead and shall see what happens! I'll report tomorrow, hope you all sleep well!
Just found this post and wondered how you are getting on now and if your dd is sleeping better now?
My dd is also 9months and used to be a very good sleeper until about 7 1/2months when she had a string of stomach bugs and colds and got used to us cuddling her all night etc, now she wakes several times a night to be resettled and for milk!
hoping you will tell me that it soon passes and they go back to being wonderful sleepers again!
well my DS never slept, so 10 months later I'm a bit used to it but a bad night can still be hell all the same.
i greatly praise the dummy, which we said we'd never use (we too were very smug about certain things). he is a very 'sucky' baby, and if anything works, it's usually the dummy at 2 am.
if you don't want to go there, i understand, because i feel the same about cc. but if you're not averse, have you tried a "soother" (that sounds so much better, doesn't it?)
Hi all am having exactly the same now with 9 month old - he is now waking every couple of hours or so & is just..awake....he cries till I come in then seems to just want to play or crawls around in his cot & will only go back to sleep if I pick him up which of course I hate doing thinking oh no bad habits bad habits - pleeeeeeaaaaassssse tell me it's just a phase and he will miraculously get back to being a good sleeper!!
This happened with our baby, and it was teething. Unfortunately we just had to roll with it. She's now back to sleeping really well (eight front teeth later!). DD would always settle with a dummy though, as she's a very sucky baby. I found Anbesol teething gel for babies helped a lot. I also tied dummies on muzzies onto her cot bars, and she could get her own dummy during the night without needing to cry out.
Brilliant, thanks Piggysgal, will get some anbesol tomorrow - this teething business is a mare cos is just seems so random so I never know whether to give him medicine or not. Glad to hear you are getting more sleep now!
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