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Behaviour/development

1yo being 'mean' to toys - how to handle?

5 replies

Schwanengesang · 27/10/2017 07:06

DS is one in a couple of weeks. For the last 2 or so months he has been asking for particular toys (by pointing to them) but when given them he will gleefully fling them across the room, laughing, while watching my response. If I say "oh poor monkey, did he fall over, shall we give him a cuddle?" he will solemnly pat the toy for a bit, then look at me, grin, and fling it again.

I guess this is normal toddlerish behaviour, and it's fairly funny. I am not worried. But am I doing the right thing trying to teach him empathy here, or am I barking up the wrong tree? He seems so pleased to see particular toys, and cuddle them briefly, before using them as projectiles...

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snowglobe67 · 27/10/2017 08:49

He's very young, he's still learning about how the world works, cause and effect etc. This sounds like he's developed a lovely little game with you, throw, mummy responds, comfort, throw again.

All completely normal.

Let him get on with it unless toys aren't suitable for throwing.

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Schwanengesang · 27/10/2017 09:19

Yes I did wonder if I was overthinking it. It seemed to come out of seeing older kids being taught to comfort one another when one cries, at Playgroup, which is why I was thinking I needed to steer him down the right path, away from being deliberately unkind. But he may be way too young to be thinking like that..

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Schwanengesang · 27/10/2017 09:21

Toys are stuffed animals btw so quite specifically characters rather than objects - he never does this with cars or shape sorter etc

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snowglobe67 · 27/10/2017 09:22

Just let him see you being caring and kind towards others and towards him. Empathy develops much later and can be guided later on but good role models in early life gives him a massive head start 😊

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lovely36 · 30/10/2017 02:03

Babies don't know what being mean is. To him it's a game. Teach him that throwing things means he's not getting it back. If he throws things only to get it back he's learning that's it's a game. And that's fun to him. Tell him that if he throws it then it's gone for the day. Might sound a little harsh and he might be upset but it works and he will learn not to throw. If he is rough with toys teach him to gently put them down. I mean really commit. Every time he throws have him take the toy again and place it down gently. Show him how first. Every single time something is thrown. Have him put it down softly again and eventually he will begin to put things down softly on his own. If he is never taught then he does not know otherwise. I'm a nursery teacher so I've dealt with this so much lol hope it helps. X

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