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11 year old boys

(9 Posts)
user1495390444 Mon 22-May-17 20:31:32

I have an 11 year old son and 13 year old daughter. Separated for 6 years from their father who doesn't see them for quality time at the moment. As he doesn't live with children I believe he has no idea how they behave and I am being made to feel that I'm always wrong with how I'm bringing them up.

I'd just like some support about how 11 year olds generally behave to give me confidence that I'm doing OK!

user1491572121 Tue 23-May-17 07:54:25

Well...they're all different! Theres' no real code to how an 11 year old boy should behave other than the usual moral values and manners which are expected of all children of that age.

EveryoneTalkAboutPopMusic Tue 23-May-17 22:02:18

What is the 11 year old doing OP that your Ex is criticising?

Some of us with children of a similar age hang around in the Preteens section. If you ask MNHQ to move your thread to there, you may get a few more replies smile

user1495390444 Tue 23-May-17 22:15:29

Oh I see....thank you. Totally new to this!

EveryoneTalkAboutPopMusic Tue 23-May-17 22:24:33

So what is your ex saying to you?

user1495390444 Tue 23-May-17 22:28:50

He has this way of criticising things I do. I think he thinks I do nothing to support my kids. I just think my son is being a typical 11 nearly 12 year old. Struggling with first year at high school and finding his feet. His dad makes everything such a huge deal that it impacts on how I react if you know what I mean. He's a control freak basically hmm

EveryoneTalkAboutPopMusic Tue 23-May-17 22:51:27

Ok, so how much contact do they have? What type of things is DS doing?

user1491572121 Tue 23-May-17 22:53:26

Is DS getting into trouble at school?

GrassWillBeGreener Tue 23-May-17 23:26:36

I've a son the same age; albeit one with quirks. He's gained maturity steadily this year, with help from his school. Difference there is that he's in a prep through to year 8 so didn't have changing school to deal with (though we did have difficulties with senior school pretests; our preferred school ended up deciding they needed to see him again in a year... giving him a bit more time to grow up essentially)

A big thing here is when you think they can do something themselves / take responsibility for something - and then something goes wrong. And you are torn between feeling that they should have been able to do it, or feeling guilty that maybe you were asking too much of them too soon. I don't think that goes away in a hurry!

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