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How does parental separation affect 18 month old

(4 Posts)
Sushi123 Sat 20-May-17 20:59:09

Hi , I separated from my child's dad 3 weeks ago. It is a friendly split, no third party or anything, and my child sees his dad 3-4 times a week, at least two of these times are family times so I am present as well and we do not argue. I've noticed recently that my son has become nervous and afraid of things like a noisy truck going by or anything unusual...he's very clingy to me, he's ok with my mum etc if I'm not there, but I'm there he just sticks with me...is this normal behaviour or do you think it is connected to the split? (He goes to day care two days a week and is always happy to go there as he's gone since he was tiny)

EveryoneTalkAboutPopMusic Tue 23-May-17 22:07:12

Not sure on that one sorry. Hopefully this will bump for yiu.

beccii161016 Thu 25-May-17 20:18:47

It definitely could be because of the split. Children tend to love routine and can be affected when they lose it in any way. It could just be a developmental phase though!
Having said that, the most important thing is that you and your LO's dad continue doing things as normal and stay civil. As long as he is surrounded by love and positive vibes, that is the most important thing!

blondiebonce Thu 25-May-17 20:28:18

It's a change so yes it has likely affected him but he will most likely settle into the new "normal". Children react to lots of changes but ultimately do adapt. Looking back he won't remember that things changed.
My little girl was nearly 1 when ex and I split and yes she needed more reassurance for a while, she adapted and in all is a very happy, sociable little girl. She is a mummy's girl but is used to not being with me constantly and finds it easier to adapt in new situations now (nearly 3).

I have noticed a difference recently where she has been more clingy and upset but I think it's because daddy only sees her once a week and will cancel. She's more aware of not seeing him, but that's down to him. He put her down for a nap recently on his one day with her and left to play golf with his new girlfriends parents for the rest of the day. She woke up and he'd gone so she was really put out. She woke in the night to check I was there for a few weeks.

Basically- this won't mentally scar your son, it's how you deal with it moving forward. If both parents are consistent with whatever suits you all and show mutual respect and have the right priorities your little boy will be absolutely fine and unlikely to be adversely affected.

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