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Limiting Computer Time for 10 y.o.?

(3 Posts)
EyepatchOfTravis Fri 21-Apr-17 11:03:57

I wonder if anyone could please help.

My DD seems to have been getting more and more reliant on the internet recently, and I know I am at fault, but I really want to rectify it.

A little background - she is an only child. I am divorced and she spends most time with me, most weekends with her Dad. She can be quite anxious, and has historically had problems maintaining friendships.

She has got really into the internet - she loves to play Animal Jam and she enjoys watching gamers like Dan TDM on You Tube. I think in a way she finds companionship watching and doing these things that she doesn't get from her relationship with me (though we've always had a pretty close relationship). She aspires to have her own You Tube channel gaming when she is older. As she's been in Year 6, because they work so hard at school, I've probably let her have more "down time" on the computer than I should have done.

This holiday, I have found it increasingly difficult to get her off the computer to do things. Having no siblings makes it harder as she has no one to play with. I've managed to arrange a couple of meet ups with friends so she has some peers to spend time with, but most people seem to be away. She has had afternoons playing in her room too now and again, and I have made sure we go out a few times and get fresh air - but what she really wants to do is spend all day online. When she spends a few hours online at a time, she can get quite tired and moody, and I'm worried that though she gets a lot of positive things from it too, it's not great for her development.

Today I've said that I want her to start having at least an hour away from the internet between every hour she spends on it. She has spent the entire morning screaming and crying. I'm getting "well, I don't want to go online at all now" and lots of sulking in her room. We've had a long, reasonable discussion, where I've listened to what she has to say and answered all her points reasonably. She's back in her room, hysterically crying and screaming "why?!"

Am I using a sledgehammer to crack a nut? I don't know how long I should be letting her on the internet at a time. I don't know how to handle it. Has anyone else come up against this and could you suggest anything?

Thanks

EyepatchOfTravis Fri 21-Apr-17 12:38:01

Hope it's ok to bump?

nowanotherone Fri 21-Apr-17 14:22:08

I would suggest having a time limit per day she is allowed screens. Eg. One hour per day on a school day and maybe more at weekend. She can use it when she wants but once it's gone it's gone. My 8 yr old is allowed an hour per day on weekends only on the Wii or iPad doing games but no gaming in the week. I would say he has 1.5 hours of TV a day though each day in the week. That's not as addictive as gaming though apparently so can be treated seperate. Good luck

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