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Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Behaviour/development

How out of order is this for an 11yo?

19 replies

LynetteScavo · 13/03/2017 22:25

She has used my nice eye cream as a face cream.

She has taken a YSL Touche Eclat (I had a few...long story) from my cupboard and opened it, and used it.

I did not remain calm.

OP posts:

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Applesauce29 · 13/03/2017 22:28

I was probably guilty of similar as a teenager. Is this the first time? She's still v.young. Why don't you offer to take her to a beauty counter for age appropriate make up as a birthday / mother daughter day treat sometime? That way she can experiment without raiding your stuff. And buy her some basic face wash and moisturiser.

Dontactlikeyouknowme · 13/03/2017 22:31

But her some moisturiser of her own?

If you have a few of your posh ones,then I wouldn't be too as mad that she's used one.

LynetteScavo · 13/03/2017 22:36

Oh, she has basic facewash and moisturiser.

And expensive cleanser which I gave her and she used up in a weekend, and now only has a bit left, but it;s dark grey . And cleansing wipes. And lip gloss, clear mascara. All that I've given her.....

And then she has the rest she's bought herself....eyes shaddow. Apparently she doesn't need blusher, as "nobody uses blusher anymore, it;s all about contouring"

This is the girl that is so un-girly it's not true...she's doing all this makeup stuff in a feeble attempt to impress the other girls in her form at school. I'm mostly running with it, as I don't mind a bit of make up, and my mum was useless with such things. As long as she uses hers, not mine.

She needs to LEAVE MY STUFF ALONE!

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flumpsnshit · 13/03/2017 22:36

I'll take that and raise you a 12yo who steals my straighteners, my make up brushes, my jewellery and nightshirts and a 13 yo who steals all my tights because hers get holes after one wear my tops inc new ones I haven't worn, make up, shoes and the worst thing is she looks better in the clothes than I do ! I wouldn't mind but they have their own versions of all my stuff and more expensive clothes than me

wonderlustt · 13/03/2017 22:39

It's not really out of order, she's growing up, experimenting & trying new things. It's so difficult for the young generation to grow up with the peer pressure of modern society so maybe calm down, explain to her that she mustn't do that again because those are mum's, but you would be happy to help her pick out her own. Getting mad is not going to help in this situation, she didn't do it to upset you

JonesyAndTheSalad · 13/03/2017 22:41

I don't like the way you say "she's ungirly" and "she's doing all this makeup in a feeble attempt to impress the other girls'

That's why they ALL do it.

You sound sneery. She's 11. She had no idea about the price of Touch Eclat probably.

Perhaps try not to label her as "ungirly" and be more understanding of her attempts to try out makeup

Girly is a stupid label too.

LynetteScavo · 13/03/2017 22:42

Maybe I should just be glad DD has perfectly straight hair and doesn't need my straighteners, and is a very skinny XS, where as I like to think I'm M, but in reality I need to buy L.

She tried to talk her way out of it by telling me "but all my friends say you are so pretty" Flattery will get her nowhere.

I'm funny, but I'm not pretty

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JonesyAndTheSalad · 13/03/2017 22:44

Whathaveilost · 13/03/2017 22:47

To be fair I would go mad if my kids touch my personal stuff without asking, whether it's a packet of rolos or my favourite perfume.

You keep your hands off things that aren't yours. It's been a rule since they were small. I don't get this 'oh, she didn't know the price of it' or she's experimenting. Bollocks, she can experiment with her own stuff or ask if she can use it.

LynetteScavo · 13/03/2017 22:48

She had no idea about the price of Touch Eclat probably.

She had no idea! But she shouldn't have taken it!

I'm not sneery, I'm bloody livid.

I've spent years loving that she is herself and hasn't subscribed to looking like all the other girls. I've all ways told her she IS a girl , she just doesn't like stuff many other girls do. For years she wanted to be a boy. Then WHAM! she goes into Y7 and is applying eye shadow at 7am. I don't have a problem with the makeup. I'll buy her as much as she want's.

I do have a huge problem with her using my eye cream all up.

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Patriciathestripper1 · 13/03/2017 22:51

That's the problem with girls, they take your stuff.
I came in from work and my Dd 10 had moved all my perfume ( I'm a bit of a perfume whore) onto her dressing table

LynetteScavo · 13/03/2017 22:51

I would go mad if my kids touch my personal stuff without asking, whether it's a packet of rolos or my favourite perfume.

Exactly. DH goes mad if they take his parking money of his bedside table. It maybe only 50p, but it means he can't park. 2 out of 3 of my DC have learned not to to take it. DD hasn't. She's a law unto herself.

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LynetteScavo · 13/03/2017 22:52

Patriciathestripper1 I shouldn't laugh; but I did!

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JonesyAndTheSalad · 13/03/2017 23:10

Maybe I'm unusual but I genuinuely don't care if my DD"s take my makeup and things. I'm not well off but it doesn't bother me.

Belongings aren't my main concern.

LynetteScavo · 13/03/2017 23:19

It bothers me. If I've stashed something it's mine. Not DH's, not DS1's DS2,'s not the next door neighbors, and not DDs. Especially if it was expensive.

Anyone who eats my last piece of chocolate dies.

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Mysterycat23 · 13/03/2017 23:21

Have you helped her do make up / do make overs together? Or are you just expecting her to youtube it?

It's not feeble to try and fit in in year 7. It's life and death.

Despite any outward attitude, she's still young and you're still her main role model. She would probably love to do proper make overs with her mum and learn how to use cleanser appropriately etc.

Maybe take the cost of the products out of her pocket money but please spend a bit of positive time with her on this, it sounds like she is having, or is on track for, a very tough time at school.

LynetteScavo · 13/03/2017 23:22

She knows the code of my bank card from when we've been shopping and she's seen me put in may pin.

If she takes all of my cash it will be my main concern.

Teaching my children respect for other peoples things is quite high on my list of things my DC must know.

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LynetteScavo · 13/03/2017 23:27

Mysterycat23 thank you. You are so, so right.

I have just expected her to Youtube it.

In all honesty I am crap at eye shaddow. Maybe we could Youtube it together (any you tube suggestions gratefully received!)

It's not feeble to try and fit in in year 7. It's life and death.

Absolutely. Thank you. I might get this printed on a t-shirt or printed and framed. x

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flumpsnshit · 14/03/2017 22:37

My girls taught me contouring via YouTube !
There's loads of good ones on there, I can finally do smoky slut eyes now I'm too old !
I've given in except for chocolate if they touch that there's big bloodbaths telling offs

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