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Frenemies-age 5?????

(3 Posts)
user1488799502 Mon 06-Mar-17 11:48:05

We have a slight situation brewing between my son and a friend of his at school. My son is an only child and gets very attached to other kids when they show interest in wanting to be friends. He can a little too overenthusiastic, trying to monopolise the friends time at parties and being a bit ‘in your face’ etc. We have spoken to him about this and he does take it on boar...sometimes.

There is 1 friend who shows signs of wanting to besties, inviting my son round for play dates but then at parties when other kids are about the friend wants nothing to do with my son, it’s upsetting to see him confused and upset when one minute the other boy wants to be best friends and the next completely rejects him.

I know we can’t stop other people hurting him but any tips on how to help my son deal with this??? Any tips would be greatly appreciated.

JonesyAndTheSalad Mon 06-Mar-17 13:30:18

Firstly, don't worry too much at this point. It's quite normal for some children to struggle slightly at such a young age.

If I were you I would avoid all talk of "besties" and also, remove any pressure from him so don't ask him who he played with or anything after school.

Help him by varying his playmates if you can. Are there other boys you can invite over for a playdate?

If a child wants to invite him for a playdate but then does not want to play at school, just encourage your son to play with others.

I think schools actually don't spend any enough time on small children and helping them to develop social skills.

You could also consider enrolling him in Beavers.

LuchiMangsho Mon 06-Mar-17 13:39:00

Do they have besties at 5? My son has friends. Some weeks he plays more with one friend than the other. Sometimes he wants play dates with one friend but might well play with others at a party. It's not 'rejection'. I think you are ascribing very adult emotions to 5 year old friendships.

My son had a friend like yours. Nice boy but full on. They have a shared interest and so they got on well initially. But then my son found that if he played with other kids (especially at parties) this boy would get upset and try and stop him etc. And then didn't want to play with him any more because he found it all too overwhelming. I stayed well out of all of this btw. He is 5- he can play with whoever he likes. As long as he is well behaved and shares with his friends, I am not going to micro manage his friendships.

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