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Pre-schoolers naked in front of each other

(30 Posts)
mms164 Tue 28-Feb-17 15:09:34

I'm new here and wasn't sure where to post this topic. Basically my boy is 5 and is at foundation stage 2. I just came to know that during swimming classes all the children (boys and girls) are put in one changing room and made to change in front of each other. My son came back telling me that his friends saw his private parts and didn't seem to be comfortable with it. I honestly don't feel it's the right thing to do so I had a word this morning with the head teacher and she kept assuring me that it's a normal thing and we shouldn't worry about it and that children are innocent. The thing is it's because the children are so innocent why expose them to nudity especially that children are very much curious at this age and don't understand many things!! I was further more shocked to know that this continues to happen up to year 4 when children are almost 8 years old confused.. am I the only one who thinks this is not normal!!! Should I escalate this and ask for it firmly to be stopped! My husband was telling how traumatized he was when a nude picture of a female fell into his hands when he was only 6 and had never seen female genitalia before and thought that the lady in the picture had an injury to her private parts and that they were cut by a knife and as a child he never spoke about it to anyone's s just grew with it.. I don't want something similar to happen to my child god forbids. I already tried explaining to my child what's the difference between boys and girls in general.. I really don't know how to deal with this.. any help or advise??!

FannyWisdom Tue 28-Feb-17 15:10:47



Gowgirl Tue 28-Feb-17 15:12:14

You're reaction is so wrong I don't even know where to start, there is nothing wrong or dirty about skin.

elQuintoConyo Tue 28-Feb-17 15:14:05

My 5yo DS still runs around naked on the beach.

Hth. Trolly McTrollyson

Gowgirl Tue 28-Feb-17 15:16:04

As you have children I assume your dh recovered from the shock sniggers

Wishiwasmoiradingle2017 Tue 28-Feb-17 15:16:05

My dd had public hair at 8 and no way would she have gotten changed with others around!! Kids /teens /adults should be allowed privacy if that's what their feelings require imo. Not about shame /prude /safety just personal choice. Ask if private changing is available.

m0therofdragons Tue 28-Feb-17 15:19:55

In most pools round here the cut off is 8 to be in the same changing room. 8yos and under are not looking at each other feeling horny! hmm

Kelsoooo Tue 28-Feb-17 15:22:39

Wow. Erm. To start with they aren't preschoolers if they're at school. Also it sounds like you're projecting your husbandz, frankly bizarre, reaction onto your child. Children should be curious, they should also have had the "dont touch people" conversation.

Peakyblinder Tue 28-Feb-17 15:24:02


Peakyblinder Tue 28-Feb-17 15:25:13

"cut by a knife "
Sure. he said that. Uh huh. Definitely. biscuit

Primaryteach87 Tue 28-Feb-17 15:27:54

I think your husband's comments are really odd...surely he had seen his mum or siblings naked as a v young child? I wouldn't be worried that young children are changing together as long as they are properly supervised.

Primaryteach87 Tue 28-Feb-17 15:28:12

I think your husband's comments are really odd...surely he had seen his mum or siblings naked as a v young child? I wouldn't be worried that young children are changing together as long as they are properly supervised.

Imavinoops Tue 28-Feb-17 15:34:55

I remember changing together for swimming was pretty normal when younger for us at school.

As we got a little older the "knicker trick" came into play for anyone who felt self conscious (probably around the 8 year old mark I imagine)
I never worked out how to do the knicker trick. It was a proper amazing feat though!

Surely it isn't a bad thing if children are curious about differences between them and their peers. It just seems like a good learning opportunity to me, not something that should be hidden away.

minipie Tue 28-Feb-17 15:48:51

If this is real...hmm

... then doesn't your DH's reaction prove it would be better if boys and girls do see each others' bits when they are little? So they aren't shocked when they finally do get a glimpse?

If your DS was uncomfortable I can only assume it's because you've given him weird ideas about nudity.

DragonsToSlayAndWineToDrink Tue 28-Feb-17 15:52:12

I can still do the knicker trick with reasonably stretchy skimpy pants on!

SeveredPixieBits Tue 28-Feb-17 15:58:24

Has your child never seen you naked?

Pagwatch Tue 28-Feb-17 16:00:40

<worlds greatest eye roll>

MumUndone Tue 28-Feb-17 16:07:11


Sittinginthesun Tue 28-Feb-17 16:10:55

I can also still do the knicker trick, and I can also do the bra trick. grin

SpuriouserAndSpuriouser Tue 28-Feb-17 16:20:44

I am going to go and try the knicker trick to see if I can still do it grin

But seriously OP, on the off chance that you are for real, surely the best way to prevent your kids from being horrified at the sight of female genitalia is to normalise it i.e. let them get changed around kids of their own age in what is a completely innocent context.

Timetogrowup2016 Tue 28-Feb-17 19:08:37


justnowords Tue 28-Feb-17 19:12:29

your dp has serious issues, you seem to have issues and your dc are probably gonna have issues. School is correct. I believe there is no other thread where my user name has been so apt.

zeeboo Tue 28-Feb-17 19:19:35

Why are you referring to school children as pre-schoolers?

Buttercupsandaisies Tue 28-Feb-17 19:29:59

Regardless of the response of your DH etc I agree that they should be getting changed separately. DDs school started swimming from year 2 and always had separate changing rooms. She was a bit nervous changing in front of girls nevermind boys! Id be having a word - it's not about inappropriateness as such - some kids feel more comfortable with privacy and it should be respected. Year 4 (age 8-9) is terrible imo

Buttercupsandaisies Tue 28-Feb-17 19:31:36

I should add that our local baths provides swimming lessons for all the local schools and its policy that they go in diff rooms. Is the pool part of the school itself?

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