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25 month old partially non-verbal??

(38 Posts)
Tracey300884 Tue 14-Feb-17 10:50:07

My just-turned-2yr old is a clever little girl in many ways. Knows how to wake my phone up and open the CBeebies App. Change the Sky channel from the set top box(!) and watches so much Bing that she has started shouting "Flop!!" when she needs something instead of Mummy. Although, she has only JUST started saying "Mummy" this past week... She's been saying "Daddy" since she was about 11 months (even though she doesn't have one!) and has been singing the full "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" song (well, one line is her own version!) for months.

However, she still isn't responding to questions. Or asking me questions. So if I say "Do you want a drink sweetheart" she'll just look at me. Maybe mutter something in her own language and go back to what she's doing? Is this normal?? I have to put the drink in front of her and if she wants it, she'll take it. If she doesn't she'll say "No" and throw it on the floor or hand me it back! She will never ever ask or say she does want something and has never picked up a toy/sweet in a shop and indicate that she wants it. She also doesn't really point to things and if I point to something she hasn't yet figured out that she's meant to look at what I'm pointing to?
She can string sentences together if it's part of a song. But the rest of the time she'll only three maybe four words at the most. The rest of what she says is in her own little language. She does recognise things on the tv and when we're driving past somewhere she knows. Like the Soft Play Centre that has recently closed down angryenvy (Ever tried explaining that one to a 2yr old?!?!?!?!?)

Am I being paranoid? Or should she be way more developed than this? It is NOT that I am necessarily 'wanting' her to be more advanced than she is. I'm just worried she is a little behind? My friend has a little girl the same age and she is streets ahead! I know they develop at different rates. But my friend's little girl will respond to any question and will pretty much have a full conversation nearly with her Mummy sad

My girl is an only child with a depressed Mummy that probably should interact with her a little more than I already do! (It's just so hard sometimes sad)

Please be kind! Thanks

Housequeen101 Tue 14-Feb-17 10:57:47

Did she have her two year check with the HV?
No advise just wanted to send hugs. Mummying can be hard. Xx

Somehowsomewhere Tue 14-Feb-17 11:03:14

It's really hard to say, as they do develop so differently. Has she had her 2 year development check? They do it at 2 years and 3 months here.
For comparison, my 3 year old barely talked at all until just before she was 2 and then within a week or two was talking on full sentences. It came on really rapidly. I also have a 19 month old who has approx 100 words and puts 3-4 word sentences together.
That's largely irrelevant though. The language thing sounds fine to me, but the lack of shared attention may be a concern (or may not!).
Could you book a HV appt, even if just to put your mind at rest?

PhilODox Tue 14-Feb-17 11:07:45

Have you had a hearing check? (Recognising places but not questions suggests she doesn't hear well) did she have ear infections at all?

ZeroDarkHurty Tue 14-Feb-17 11:08:56

I think your should bring these things up with her health visitor. I think she does sound behind for joint attention and speech, but am not an expert (I have 2 dc, one with additional needs). Not understanding pointing etc would be the main concerns at this point, I imagine.

Tracey300884 Tue 14-Feb-17 14:02:29

No 2yr check yet. She had her Hearing tested at birth, no issues.

I just pointed at something now and she followed correctly and copied me. Now she's pointing at everything!

Still ignoring questions confusedsad

AllPizzasGreatAndSmall Tue 14-Feb-17 14:12:14

It's not the deficit in language that would concern me so much, but the lack of communication. It's not appropriate to speculate on why she might not be doing/not doing things, but I think it would be a good idea to contact your HV with your concerns.

Tracey300884 Tue 14-Feb-17 14:15:07

It's my fault then isn't it??? confusedsadsadsadsad

Oh my god

Redkite10a Tue 14-Feb-17 14:28:50

My just turned 2 year old is a little behind in his speech and isnt putting words together at all yet, but responds to questions, often with gestures. In DS case he had hearing loss due to glue ear from about 9 months to about 18 months. When I first had concerns about his speech, I was told to fill in the progress checker on this website talkingpoint.org.uk and if the results were off concern I could self refer to speech and language therapy. It might be worth a look for you?

DS was seen by SALT a couple of times but had been discharged because his speech is coming along, although it is at the low end of normal. It does still worry me slightly though when we meet up with friends whose same age toddler are putting together sentences and can for example tell you what they had for breakfast whereas all mine can say is 'too' (for food)!

MiaowTheCat Tue 14-Feb-17 14:37:19

Talk to the HV but DD2 had hardly any words at 2 years - lots of animated babbling so HV was unconcerned.

It's taken her turning a fair bit into her threes to discover her inner gobshite (she's still got some issues with speech maturity but it's suddenly taken off massively). In her case she had a very very very verbal and articulate older sister doing all the talking for her - and a lazy streak meaning she was happy to let her sister do the work.

I'd ask them to pop her on the list for a hearing check - it's the first thing they'll work to eliminate if there IS any problem so if you can get a referral for that then it's that hurdle jumped in advance (it could be something like glue ear's going on).

Tracey300884 Tue 14-Feb-17 14:58:37

Thanks guys. Glue ear is worth a check. Will look at that website, thanks x

AllPizzasGreatAndSmall Tue 14-Feb-17 15:00:47

It's my fault then isn't it???

Of course it isn't your fault if your child is not doing what you might expect the 'average' two year old to be doing.

When I mentioned concern at lack of communication I didn't mean you not talking to her enough, I meant her not attempting to communicate with you e.g. asking for things or answering your questions, which can be done non-verbally, even if she doesn't have the language.

Tracey300884 Tue 14-Feb-17 15:01:28

Oh hang on, I've just remembered that the doc checked her ears a couple weeks ago when she was poorly so I'm doubting she has Glue Ear....damn. I was hoping that was a possibility rather than developmental delays confused

BlahBlahBlahEtc Tue 14-Feb-17 15:05:16

My brother didn't talk until he was 2.5. After that you couldn't shut him up...
My nephew is 23 months and won't talk out of stubborness, he's up to date with every other aspect so there's no need to worry, the same with your little one. Some kids just don't take to talking until a bit later. If she's up to date with the other things like being able to understand commands like go get your shoes for example, chances are she's totally fine.

Somehowsomewhere Tue 14-Feb-17 15:06:24

Oh hang on, I've just remembered that the doc checked her ears a couple weeks ago when she was poorly so I'm doubting she has Glue Ear....damn. I was hoping that was a possibility rather than developmental delays confused

The Dr won't be able to tell if there is a problem with her hearing. DD2 has had hearing tests after recurrent ear infections... nothing could be seen outwardly but there was a risk her hearing could have been infected. In fact the test did show mild to moderate hearing loss in her left ear and we're waiting for a consultant appt to decide whether she'll need grommets, but I'm not overly concerned as she is talking in short sentences at 19 months.
A hearing check will be a good place to start.

BlahBlahBlahEtc Tue 14-Feb-17 15:06:37

(It's normal for a 2 year old to ignore you too. Don't stress smile )

Somehowsomewhere Tue 14-Feb-17 15:06:54

*affected. Not infected.

M0stlyBowlingHedgehog Tue 14-Feb-17 15:23:11

Okay - first, don't panic. Lots of 2 year olds don't talk much for all sorts of reasons.

Second - don't blame yourself - you sound like a lovely mum.

Third - do get it checked out. Talk to your health visitor or GP. Although almost certainly there is nothing to worry about, it could be something that warrants further checks, and if it is a problem, the sooner interventions and help are put in place the better. But randoms on the internet can't tell you this, only a specialist in child development can.

Fingers crossed she's just a late talker. flowers OP.

PurpleAlerts Tue 14-Feb-17 15:23:48

A doctor wouldn't be able to tell if she had glue ear unless he carried out tympanometry (where a device inserted into the ear puffs air and measures the flexibility of the eardrum.) Most doctors would not routinely do this- usually performed at an audiology clinic.

I think getting her hearing checked would be an obvious place to start. Even a mild loss caused by glue ear can have quite a significant impact on speech and language development. If diagnosed there are a number of different routes- Some audiologists will give hearing aids temporarily as waiting lists for grommets are often long. Also glue ear is something that many children grow out of and temporary hearing aids may bridge the gap while the condition clears up and the child won't need to go through surgery. Grommets don't always work the first time and repeated grommet surgery can cause scarring on the ear drum.

AllPizzasGreatAndSmall Tue 14-Feb-17 15:25:19

BlahBlahBlahEtc

The OP has said a few things about her daughter's development that could be of concern, so telling her that she will be fine is not particularly helpful. Hopefully there is nothing to worry about, but it is better that she contacts a professional to investigate her concerns. If there is a problem it can be addressed and if there isn't, then no harm done

BlahBlahBlahEtc Tue 14-Feb-17 15:34:25

Alright but I was trying to make the op feel a bit better. He daughter sounds perfectly normal to me, if she wants to check her out she can of course, I didn't say she shouldn't, but the way some people are carrying on is ridiculous. Also thanks for singling me out there but I wasn't the only person that said she's probably fine... which is what I said.. CHANCES ARE i.e PROBABLY.

Redkite10a Tue 14-Feb-17 15:34:43

The GP's never seemed to notice my sons glue ear, they never said anything about it despite repeated visits for ear infections. The only reason we had a hearing test done at all in the first place was I happened to mention his burst ear drum to the health visitor at his 10 month check and she asked if his hearing seemed normal, and I wasn't sure. Once that showed some hearing loss we were then in the system for follow up hearing tests and referral to ENT. The ENT consultant could apparently see if his ears were clear or not.

If you are concerned, maybe call your health visitor and ask what you should do to get it checked out in your area?

BlahBlahBlahEtc Tue 14-Feb-17 15:35:53

Also I did point out that if she's doing fine in every other regard then it's less reason to worry and as she sings to her songs and can follow instruction and does say some words, hearing issues probably aren't the cause...

MiaowTheCat Tue 14-Feb-17 16:15:13

It's not your fault anyway whatever it is - like I say - DD2 was barely speaking till well after her 3rd birthday but her sister was always incredibly capable in terms of her language, vocabulary and speech clarity (she never shuts up - even talks away in her sleep)... with 11 months between them in the same house - I obviously didn't massively fuck up one while providing the other with some kind of insanely enriching environment... it's just the way things pan out sometimes! (DD1 was a very very late walker... DD2 a very very late talker).

What we have found now DD2 is talking is that she wasn't missing ANYTHING - she has taken absolutely everything in - just let her sister do all the talking for her!

Frazzled2207 Tue 14-Feb-17 16:20:52

I would suggest seeing the hv-
Round here they get seen a bit after their
2nd birthday.
If hv has any concern she will be referred to SALT and possibly audiology.
My son was referred, was saying very little at 2 and a half. But soon after he started making rapid progress and a year later is excellent and I'm no longer concerned.
We did go to the SALT appointment (waiting time is several months) but got swiftly discharged.

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