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Behaviour/development

My son and his dad

4 replies

Whattodo47 · 05/02/2017 11:18

We both have a loving relationship with our 6 year old son.

But whatever I do, my son always feels more connected with his dad. Things he says, does. An incident this weekend confirmed it. At a time of raw need, he asked for his dad repeatedly. I didn't figure.

It makes me feel distraught. I know he loves me, but not as much as he loves his dad.

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CoffeeDiamonds · 05/02/2017 11:36

No, no, no! Don't go there. That way madness lies.

Love is not a competition. Your son is lucky to have more than one person who loves him and he can lean on.

I call my best friend when I want to Moab about DH. I call DH when I want support. I call DM when I'm worried about the DCs. I don't love any of them more. I just need different things, at different times.

Sometimes your son will call on you. Sometimes he will call on his dad.

Don't see it as a competition. See that you are raising a child who isn't having to play a game in order to not upset a parent!
You're doing a great job.
And anyway, isn't it our job to be taken a little bit for granted? Smile

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Getnakedorgohome · 05/02/2017 11:41

I saw a great saying the other day. 'Equal rights for me doesn't mean less rights for you. It's not pie.'

The same applies to love. Keep loving and supporting your son. It's not a competition. Maybe try and find an activity he enjoys that you and him could go to by yourselves?

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Whattodo47 · 05/02/2017 11:57

Two really really helpful replies. Thanks so much. You're right. But it's hard to see it clearly in the moment.

I do a lot with him on his own. It just felt so bad that when he was scared and needed comfort, he would ask for his dad. He told the person he was with that he needed to see him because his dad was 'his true love.'

It broke my heart.

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Ilovecaindingle · 05/02/2017 12:00

Look at it like your ds knows for sure you are there as likely (?) you do what I consider the 'donkey work' baths /school runs /meals /organise stuff and actually that shouting for df was because he needs reminding that df is there too!!

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