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Toddler not that interested in going out

(10 Posts)
timealone Sat 28-Jan-17 23:10:41

DS is 2.5 and just doesn't seem that interested in going out much anymore, unless it is to see someone like his grandparents. He was always such an active baby/toddler up until now. He couldn't wait to get outside every day and generally refused the pram from about 15 months old. He was a nightmare to take anywhere non-toddler friendly, like shopping, as he was hard to contain.

Now he seems the opposite. He is quite happy pottering at home - "cooking" and doing the washing up. But when I ask him if he wants to go out on his bike/to the playground/soft play he usually says no. I recently bought him a new backpack to make him a bit more excited about going swimming, as we missed a couple of lessons due to him not wanting to go.

Is this normal? It seems like a bit of a personality change. He is a lovely little boy, and does seem happy enough at home. He also goes to nursery 3 days per week. But sometimes I want/need to go out and it is also good for his development. We had his 2.5 year development check this week, and his gross motor skills aren't great (can't run or jump yet). Oddly enough, he crawled/walked relatively early.

Not sure whether this is a phase, or because it is winter or something else.

llangennith Sat 28-Jan-17 23:13:22

He's not odd at all but he may be quite happy with the amount of socialising you already make him do.

SilverLinings2014 Sun 29-Jan-17 08:38:06

Sounds normal to me. My 26mo DD similar. Couldn't contain her for most of last year and now she often seems reluctant to go out. It's hard for them at i think as they don't fully understand they have to sit in the car etc to get to the fun bit of soft play/ seeing friends or whatever. It doesn't compare to the instant gratification of toys at home.

I find lots of preparation helps, so telling DD the night before what our plans are for the following day, reminding in the morning and in the run up. Then giving a count down to help transition, not in terms of time as that doesn't mean much at 2, so more like 'once I've hung this washing out and packed your bag it's time to go'. Doesn't always stop the relunctance but does make it easier.

Stormwhale Sun 29-Jan-17 08:40:05

Dd had a patch like this at that age, but now at 3.5 she demands to go out morning and afternoon and is not happy if I have jobs to do and need to stay home for a bit.

Downstairspoo Sun 29-Jan-17 08:41:22

I think it's a bit weird you're asking him. I
He may just mean "I'm enjoying what I'm doing right now and don't want to stop" that doesn't mean he won't enjoy park swimming etc when you get there!
Nice that he's playing nicely in the house now (for you as well!) but I would tell him we're going out in 10 mins, 5 mins come on time to get coat on and just go!

wobblywonderwoman Sun 29-Jan-17 08:41:37

I wouldn't really give an option, just a bright cheery 'we are going swimming, let's get our bag ready,' and offer a reward after

BellyBean Sun 29-Jan-17 15:10:58

Does he enjoy being out once he is? If yes, then I'd just state it as fact and go, even if he's reluctant.

My nearly three year old never wants to go out but is usually v happy when we finally get her ready and out. She just enjoys pottering.

minipie Sun 29-Jan-17 15:21:03

As the others have said - assuming he enjoys it once you're out I would say this is very normal and more about "I'm happy right now and don't want to stop" than not liking being out.

"Personality change" may be simply that now he is older he is finding it easier to entertain himself at home - I had the same with DD, up to toddler age it was hard to keep her at home but once she got more verbal and into books etc she was much happier at home (still happy out, but reluctant to leave what she was doing at homeh

timealone Sun 29-Jan-17 21:43:39

llangennith I'm not talking about socialising. In fact, that's probably the one thing that does get him out, if I say we are going to visit grandparents or friends. It's more the other things I mentioned: playground, soft play, playgroup etc

Downstairs I don't ask him all the time. If it's something like swimming, or I need to go to the shops I tell him we're going. If it's something like bike/playground, I do ask him because it's impromptu and totally child-centered. The time that he didn't want to go swimming, he basically refused to go and had a proper tantrum :-(

I'm not sure what to think at the moment. In terms of whether he has a good time when he is out, that is hit and miss. Recently at the playground or soft play we normally go to, he has basically not done much and was happy to go home after a short time. However, it could be that he is just bored of the places we have been to a lot. I took him to a new soft play today and he had a great time, and similar last week at a new playground.

timealone Sun 29-Jan-17 21:48:06

Should have also said: thanks for your advice, it is good to know that other toddlers are similar. I think I have been feeling a bit worried about it this weekend because of the development check last week.

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