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Toddlers and Talking

(9 Posts)
Princessxpeach Sat 21-Jan-17 16:23:33

Well i'm feeling really low. Whenever i'm on MN I always see posts about toddlers and the activities parents do with them. Majority being around 2 year olds +

My DD will be 2 in March and she doesn't talk. She grunts and screams high pitched. She does babble in her own language but doesn't repeat words or try to use words that she hears us saying or trying to teach her. She's extremely hyperactive 24/7, runs and climbs, never walks. She runs on tip toes, head bangs very aggressively on her highchair during snack and meal times (this has been going on for a year straight). She constantly has to fidget or touch something and gets very stressed if she doesn't. She barely eats, very fussy with food and prefers to throw it on the floor. She can go without meals on a daily basis because she just doesn't want food. She's very touchy, gets extremely upset quickly for no reason.

She also has zero attention span. We've tried to reach her to Sign but she doesn't pay attention. We can't get her to focus on looking at us, she'd much rather run around and if we sit her down to do it, she screams and headbangs. This was a task our speech therapist told us to do with her, and it's not working.

I've got a weekly community nursery nurse coming to monitor her, and she's not sure what's wrong. The paediatrician isn't bothered.

I'm concerned because to me and everyone else in my family her behaviour doesn't seem normal.

Any thoughts ?

RichardHead Sat 21-Jan-17 17:33:36

You sound like you're doing really well at trying to work with her, please don't think you're not doing enough smile

Does she try to communicate with you at all, with any gestures e.g. pointing, shaking/nodding head? Does she understand much of what you say to her at all?

Do you have any gut feelings of your own?

Princessxpeach Sat 21-Jan-17 17:51:05

RichardHead

Thank you, that's very kind of you.

My gut feeling deep down is that she may have some sort of mild autism or similar behaviour issue. She's very social with me and my DH, bit funny with other children her age but generally likes older kids. So in that retrospect she's not your typical worry for Autism. However Autism affects a few family members in different ways, and I get days when I definitely feel there's an issue. I've relayed this back and forth between health care professionals who aren't listening, so i've resorted to finding a private paediatrician to see if my money makes a difference

RichardHead Sat 21-Jan-17 18:22:57

I must admit I thought possibly autism from what you'd posted, but I didn't want to to suddenly throw it out there unless you already had your own suspicions. From what you've posted I do think you're doing the right thing to raise it and do keep pushing it, the professionals can be very reluctant to do anything other than watch and wait at this age.

Have you heard of the Hanen books? When we had some similar worries about DS as a toddler I bought the Hanen 'More than words' book and found it very useful. Far more useful than the handful of speech therapy sessions we had. He's actually at school now, doing well but I suspect we may end up going down the diagnosis route at some point.

Don't let anyone dismiss your gut feeling flowers

Princessxpeach Sun 22-Jan-17 14:01:31

Thank you so much.

I will look into Hanen. How is your DS now? From the sounds of it, coping well but you still have suspicions?

RichardHead Mon 23-Jan-17 15:58:00

He's doing well academically and making friends, he's only 5 though so things may kick off later, he has a few quirks and also struggles with concentration a bit. Most people wouldn't really spot anything 'odd' at the moment but I think it might start to become more obvious as he gets older.

The best advice I read on here was basically to put your own 'early intervention' in place. Have you seem the Special needs board? I spent a lot of time lurking on there, it was quite overwhelming at first but the advice is fantastic. I remember just starting out with simple things like always giving two choices so he had to communicate his preference.

Does she go to nursery?

2017morework Mon 23-Jan-17 16:45:56

Hi we are on a different track, and I believe lots of parents are on the researching path for a few years before they could establish the real cause(s). On one hand, patience is much useful; on the other hand, I completely understand your worry.

Have you considered ADD? Some symptoms are shared traits between ADD and other neurological issues. ADD runs in the family too. But she's too young to be assessed for things like that. But worth looking up online.

The other thing as Richardhead mentioned, well done for being persistent and keep pushing. It may be worth the effort to get in touch with different professionals in the system, e.g. GP, health visitor, nursery and anyone who has the access to the NHS system. Most of parents would tell you if it's a dead end with one source, the other person might be wiling to listen and help.

Plus, there's a big chance that to go through the NHS system might take a very long time (to be fair, there are far too many patients to be seen). So while you keep pushing and try different routes, you may want to set a limit for waiting. Depending on how much stress your DD's situation causes in your family, how much disruption this causes in her life and how much you could afford to seek help yourself outside the system, it wouldn't hurt to start doing research in case you decide to take the financial hit and get her assessed privately.

She's still relatively young, but once she reaches more sociable age, the potential impact on her will demonstrate a lot more.

All in all, hope the worry is just temporary and she could grow out of this. But otherwise, good luck with the journey...

Princessxpeach Mon 23-Jan-17 17:25:42

2017morework - I had ADD as a child and my husbands instinct is also that she may have it too. A lot of the symptoms suggest so, but you just never know. I've informed almost everyone I can, all sharing a different opinion. I can understand symptoms present themselves later on but should they get worse in the run up to it, surely that's only causing more of a delay for her?

RichardHead, she started nursery a while back but I took her out. She wasn't ready, was too overwhelming and she just didn't do much apart from run around hyperactive. She's starting again in a few weeks and hoping for a more positive experience this time! I know what you mean, we know our children best and spot these odd behaviours from a mile off that otherwise someone such as an outsider wouldn't notice. I wonder if we over analyse?

I'm glad your boy is doing well, it's lovely to hear. I know for sure you're doing the right thing so him having that support is great. I did take a peek at the special needs board and yes it's very very overwhelming at first. But I'm confident on the great advice that will be provided, so I really appreciate the tip.

2017morework Mon 23-Jan-17 18:04:03

Princessxpeach, I wish I could provide something more helpful. But unfortunately, from all what I read, ADD/ADHD isn't diagnosed at young age.

However, it just rings my bell that you might also want to look into sensory issue. (As the more research you do, the more you realise all these spectrums somehow cross each other. One child could have potential multiple challenges to deal with. But from the brighter side, multiple disciplines would mean you could start from different points to improve and help them.) My DS certainly has ADHD traits, but no way I could get him diagnosed until he's 7 above. So I'm looking at auditory processing issue right now, which means he's odd behaviour in some way might be explained from auditory point of view - over-sensitive or under-sensitive. I myself is the latter case. So I kinda could imagine his frustration (subconsciously to him) when he couldn't "hear" properly. That might lead to him hard to concentrate in noisy environment, delay in speech, not sociable and difficult to get engaged and just loves to run (endless running).

Anyway, I mean, research, research and research. You might find more "clicks" which leads more possibilities to help her.

Ah, also diet. Some people claim by changing diet could turn things around dramatically. A friend of mine has proved it worked for her family (enormously). Her bible is Dr Natasha "s GAPS (Gut and Psychology Syndrome). Might worth trying.

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