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9 year old, moving homes. Is it a bad time?

(4 Posts)
Feellikerubbish Tue 10-Jan-17 14:43:31

We have been debating since our son was little, to move out of East London. Me and partner both grew up here and would like a new start. We had lots of family issues and wasn't sure where to move so in the end, we are still where we are now.

My son will turn 9 this year and not long to go before we apply for secondary schools. We are not that keen on the local secondary school although it has become a lot better than it used to be.

My son is slow to warm to people and has always been a bit too honest (sometimes coming across a bit rude) and doesn't share very well. So at school, although he has a group of friends, he always seems to be a little more left out than others. We invite friends round more than he has been invited.

We are now looking to make the move to a new area and now doubting our decision.

Is this a bad time to move around age 9? I am starting to see a shift in the way my son and his friends all behave and play and I'm concerned this might be a bad time for my son to move and start fresh. His self esteem is quite low and I'm worried about the effect that moving will do. Although sometimes I think perhaps a new start could be better for him.

Has anyone had any experiences of moving around this age and how it worked out? Any advise please?

I moved when I was 7 and apart from feeling a bit alone to start with, I made friends eventually at school and I don't think it took that long. But 7 is different to 9 and I think the older they get the harder it gets especially for someone who is quite reserved .

JiltedJohnsJulie Tue 10-Jan-17 22:00:57

Not got any experience sorry but if you are moving, could yiu suggest to him that it might be worth joining a club or two in your new area? Something like Scouts which might also help with his confidence?

Jos2004 Wed 11-Jan-17 06:48:18

We relocated when my dd was 8.5 and it was the perfect time for her. I was really worried about her leaving friends and changing schools but everything went well. It left enough time for her to make friendships that were well established before the transition to secondary school. I think it would be harder to be the new kid past 11. So, despite all my worrying, we had a very positive experience and almost 5 years later are loving our new life! Hope you feel you can make the right decisions for you and your family.

ToDuk Thu 12-Jan-17 07:48:50

It's a great time to move. Realistically by the time you move I guess he will be year 6 or maybe year 5 but that gives him a year or so left at primary to make some friends which he will hopefully go up to secondary with.

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