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8 weeks old - reaching/grabbing?

(12 Posts)
Caenea Thu 05-Jan-17 12:33:14

Afternoon all! I'm new here, and new to motherhood too - my dd is 8 weeks old now. I'm sure I'm going to be told I'm being very very previous! - but I have no idea at all about when children should start doing certain things and I'm not very techy so the apps aren't really working for me. I've tried to google but that isn't too helpful either so thought I'd scout around for opinions on here.

My daughter is 8 weeks old now and doesn't "reach" for things. Like I'll offer her a toy or a rattle and she won't try and grab it. Should she even be doing this yet? She'll get hold of my clothes while I'm feeding or holding her but doesn't seem to do it deliberately, just seems to grab them when her hands come into contact with them during routine flailing about. If she shouldn't be doing it, when should she?

I'm only concerned because people brought us toys for Christmas that say "from birth" on the boxes and she shows zero interest at all - even if I hold them and rattle them for her. She wont turn her head to them at all, just carries on staring at either me or the light fitting she seems to like. I'm sure I'm freaking myself out for no reason but I'm starting to worry she should be doing things she isn't?

Anyway this is long - sorry! Thanks if you've stuck with it!

FATEdestiny Thu 05-Jan-17 12:38:43

Clock here for NHS development timeline for babies

Reaching for things is a skill usually developed between 3 to 5 months old.

"From birth" on toys just means they are not dangerous for babies from birth (ie no choke risk). It is not an indication of development skills.

TheBruteSquad Thu 05-Jan-17 12:42:13

The 'from birth' just means there's nothing on them that can hurt a newborn - I.e. Safe to put in mouths etc. Not that they should be able to play with them at that age.

8 weeks is young to be reaching for things. I think DS was about 2 months before his hand was anything but a fist most of the time! And he was at least 3 months before he showed any interest in toys and would hold anything. I think he was 4 months+ before he actively picked something up.

Does she grip hold of your finger if you touch her palm?

Caenea Thu 05-Jan-17 12:43:31

Oh, thank you FATEdestiny. That's a good link! I'll have to save that one smile

I see about the from birth guidelines too - I never thought about it being in terms of meaning it was safe for them.

drivinmecrazy Thu 05-Jan-17 12:45:11

In contrast to 'suitable from birth ', I've just been looking at Amber bead teething beads for a gift for a friend with a fretful teething baby, thought I'd found the perfect item til I noticed it came with a disclaimer saying 'not suitable for children under 3' hmm
hopefully that shows just how irrelevant the guides are grin

Caenea Thu 05-Jan-17 12:46:19

Hi TheBruteSquad - yes, she just about rips off my finger if I give it to her because she doesn't always stop waving her arms about - learnt that the hard way. She likes to hold people's fingers if they're holding her.

I was starting to get a bit questioning about it because the HV said she should start looking at people if they come in etc - which she does - and for some reason in my head I assumed this would also mean she'd start grabbing for stuff too for some reason!

TheBruteSquad Thu 05-Jan-17 13:17:28

I'd only be concerned if she wasn't gripping fingers etc, as that's a natural reflex. Everything else will come in time.

Babies are born with no knowledge of who or what they are. That random arm waving is how she will (eventually) learn that her arms and hands are part of her, and that she can control them. From that will come batting at things, and then touching them, followed by holding them and finally grabbing/pulling.

Looking at someone as they come in shows her eyesights improving and she's obviously curious. But as yet she doesn't even know she has hands that can reach for things. Trust me, in a few months time you'll look back fondly at the days when something could be in arms reach without her going for it!

Sounds like you're doing the right things by showing her toys, engaging and encouraging her.

Temporaryname137 Thu 05-Jan-17 13:33:54

You sound exactly like I was! I have so many pictures of DD with a toy shoved on top of her in her bouncy chair, or clutching a soft toy when she clearly had no idea she was holding it... I felt that she should be playing with toys by that stage. In fact, just looking at the world and having you close to her is all your baby really needs right now.

When DD was about 10-12 weeks (I forget exactly), she started batting at things on her babygym (do you have one of those?). At first I wasn't sure it was deliberate, but she got better at it. She started grabbing and holding toys at about 4 months.

I realise now that my experience was mostly with much older babies, and I was expecting an 8 week old to act like a 6 month old! Relax and just enjoy the cuddles. She'll soon be running around, chucking toys on the floor to make you bend over, and then screeching because she no longer has the toy... grin

Caenea Thu 05-Jan-17 13:41:25

Ah thanks to both of you TheBruteSquad and Temporary!

We've not got a babygym yet as she can't sit up yet - but she has mobiles/toys attached to her moses basket, pram, car seat and cot (for when she goes in it) and they're always close enough so if she were to reach up, she can touch them and she does smack away at them but I think mostly because they're just where her hands happen to end up.

I'm sure I will look back nostagically at how much fascination our light fittings and curtains hold for her now.

Also, driinmecrazy - my mother is a bit previous with baby things and one of the things she brought me was a set of freezable teething rings - you pop them in either the fridge or freezer so they get cool and then they can gnaw on them. They're plastic, and safe for I think six months plus? Would they perhaps be good? I'll dig them out to find out the make if you like!

Temporaryname137 Thu 05-Jan-17 13:52:55

I would recommend a baby gym - at the moment it's somewhere safe to put her, and as she gets older, it's great for stimulating them to bat at stuff and for rolling over to look at mirrors etc. once she can sit up, you can take the top bit off and it's just a play mat smile

We had this one - but they start at about £20:,store:11804568876710642664&prds=oid:17091053800845561663&q=rainforest+play+mat&hl=en-gb&ei=g09uWP_wGMzSgAbR_Z_gDQ&lsft=gclid:CIPDi66Tq9ECFVcz0wodly8Azg

Temporaryname137 Thu 05-Jan-17 13:53:39

Oh ffs link fail. Sorry!! Just google "baby play gym" - DD loved hers from about 8 weeks to 6 months, when she graduated to the jumperoo (god I can still hear the tunes, argh)

IWantATardis Thu 05-Jan-17 14:33:40

The baby gym we have is like a playmat with arches over it for small toys to dangle off. Baby doesn't need to be sitting for it, just lay them in there on their back so they can look at dangly toys, bat at them, kick legs around, practice rolling etc.

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