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DS1 (3.5) hates being on his own

(3 Posts)
FurryGiraffe Fri 30-Dec-16 18:58:04

DS1 is 3.5. He is delightful, affectionate, funny and generally very well behaved (though prone to tears if not fed regularly or if overtired). However, he really hates being on his own. He's very good at entertaining himself and playing independently, but he likes an adult presence. I'll tell him I'm off to do something, like make a cup of tea, and in less than the time than it takes to boil a kettle he'll be in floods of tears because he doesn't want to be alone. This has become progressively worse since DS2 was born 8 months ago. We've wondered whether the dislike of being alone is really 'I don't like you giving DS2 attention' but while it does happen when I'm doing things with DS2 (such as putting him down for a nap) it happens at other times too, including when DS2 isn't there at all. I've also wondered if it's basically a control thing, but his response seems to me to be genuine distress rather than anger/frustration/tantrum which is what I'd expect if it were just about getting his way.

Has anyone experienced anything similar? How did you tackle it? At the moment I've tried to accommodate him as far as I can but sometimes it just isn't possible. And other times he seems fine with me going off to put the washing on, but then he'll just flip and be wailing.

Phoenix76 Fri 30-Dec-16 22:47:40

Oh bless him! It's hard juggling two isn't it! My two are about the age of yours. Have you tried giving him an "important" job to do while you are doing what you need to. So it could be something like match up some socks from the washing, put the (clean 😂) nappies in a stack and say "I bet I finish my job before you finish yours!" Something along those lines so he feels like he has an important role to play rather than needing you there if that makes sense? So far, it's worked for dd1 who started thinking it was ok to sit with me in the toilet! Good luck.

FurryGiraffe Sat 31-Dec-16 09:46:41

Thanks Phoenix I shall try.

DS1 once stood 30 cm from me in th bathroom while I sat on the loo and wailed 'I don't want to be on my owwwwwn'.

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