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Behaviour/development

9 month old still doesn't sit!

17 replies

mummybear1003 · 06/12/2016 09:39

My 9 month old son will still not sit or push himself up onto all fours or pull himself to his feet. All he can do is roll from his front to his back. When I try to sit him propped he goes ridged and refuses or if he lets me he slides down in less than a minute. My son was 3 weeks early and had to spend a bit of extra time in hospital due to a heart problem but his health is supposedly very good and back to normal now but he is just so behind every other baby I come across! When I talk to my health visitor or GP they don't seem concerned and keep telling me everyone does everything at different times but I am aware he is very far behind. Even stuff like solid foods, he happily takes mush but when he has finger foods to hold he won't even put them to his mouth!! His communication is good I believe, he's been high fiving since he was 5 months and can put his thumb up for fantastic and he talks away to us and himself quite happily in baby noises. I just don't know what to do, I'm struggling to enjoy the time I spend with him because all I do is stress that he is no where near doing the basic things like sitting! I mean I know some babies walk at 10 months! Seems laughable (more like cryable) just how behind my son is.

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Temporaryname137 · 06/12/2016 12:50

Ah bless you, it's such a shame that you are feeling so worried. Your baby sounds lovely and so cute with the high 5'ing and babbling to you.

If your GP and HV aren't worried, then that is a good start, but if you can't stop worrying then I would push for a referral to a paed to have a look. Hopefully it will simply put your mind at rest, but if there is an issue, better to find out sooner.

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mouldycheesefan · 06/12/2016 12:54

Hi op, my dd didn't sit until after she could walk! She would just topple over. She is now 10 and very sporty. She was 7 weeks premature.
Don't worry. It's not a race. Your child will walk and sit and feed himself. By the time he starts school you won't know who the premature ones are! Enjoy the time that they aren't on the move.

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Blossomdeary · 06/12/2016 12:54

Chat to the HV - he/she will be able to do the right assessments; but try not to worry - they all develop at different rates and it is not a competition.

My first DD spoke virtually not one word till after she was 2 - the HV was getting a bit flappy about it when DD suddenly began to talk in sentences! Ditto with reading - total lack of progress and interest, then at age about 6, I found her sitting up in bed reading the Wind in the Willows to herself - why did you not read the school books? - they are boring!

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PH123987 · 06/12/2016 13:26

I'm in a similar boat in terms of being worried about my DS's development but I am trying to listen to people's advice which is that every child is different. Before I had my DS I just thought that every baby had a standard chain of development, e.g. Rolls first, then crawls, then stands, then walks. My DS is 6months in a few weeks and he doesnt roll (although he does sometimes turn 45degrees to the side), he hates tummy time and shows no interest in trying to get himself out of being on his tummy by pushing himself up, he just literally face palms the floor and whinges. However from a young age he could bear weight on his legs and loves being stood up, and he seems to be able to sit supported, although he starts slanting to one side after a while.
I just didn't understand and it was really stressing me out at times (and yes, ashamedly and I'm disappointed in myself, I did google c palsy Sad).
However the more I speak to other people about it, the more I have realised that the chain I previously thought existed doesn't actually exist; I can't believe how many parents have told me that their baby never crawled and went straight to walking, or that their babies crawled from 6 months but hated standing, or that they never reached for toys until they were 1 years old, or even that they didn't walk until 2 years old. My 10 month old nephew will not take any form of food including purées.

I think (particularly as FTMs) that we believe that there is a standard checklist, and we drive ourselves crazy with worry if certain milestones are not being met. Your baby sounds like he is showing other great signs of development that other babies of the same age aren't yet able to do, so I would feel really reassured by this and tell yourself that certain aspects of his development may come a little bit later. Opposite circumstances to you : my nephew who doesn't eat started crawling at 6months and is now close to walking, but his mum is really worried about the fact he doesn't like food. Parenting is crazy isn't it Smile

Do you have something similar to a Bumbo seat? I bought one for my DS and has really helped developed his sitting skills as it holds them in place. It also comes with a tray that you can put toys etc on so that can distract him from getting too bored or distressed.

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mummybear1003 · 06/12/2016 15:38

Thanks for all your responses, PH123987 my son sounds exactly the same as your little one, he took ages to roll and even now mainly just does the 45 degree thing and he has been able to stand holding my hands since 6 weeks which seems crazy early! We do have a bumbo but I was told not to use it as supposedly it could hinder his muscle development and make him even later with sitting!!

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Lupinlady5 · 06/12/2016 16:32

I agree, don't put him in a bumbo. He needs to build the strength himself by using his muscles, not be propped. Both of my DSes were late with motor skills. I got help from a specialist and the number one piece of advice was not to put them in any position they can't get into themselves.

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mummybear1003 · 06/12/2016 16:58

So I shouldn't even sit him with cushions Lupinlady5? He can't get himself into any positions, literally just lying and rolling onto his side!

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Lupinlady5 · 06/12/2016 17:01

Well, I doubt many people will agree on here , but our paediatrician told us they were better off lying on tummy or back and playing then being propped. Sure enough, they did roll both ways (eventually!), pushed themselves up to sit, then to all fours, crawled, pulled up, walked. Took ages!

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RhinestoneCowgirl · 06/12/2016 17:07

My younger brother (my mum's 3rd baby) wasn't sitting at 9 months. She was fairly relaxed as not first time mum, but the HV flagged it up and referred them on for further investigation.

He had very low muscle tone and hyper mobility, eventually had a diagnosis of dyspraxia. But along the way there were lots of scary tests to rule out other stuff.

He is now in his early 30s, has a good job and is married. When he was little he had lots of physiology and hydro therapy, which really helped.

Have a chat to the HV, it's what they're there for. Chances are by the time an appointment comes up, your baby will have a sudden developmental surge and nothing to worry about, but it's better to get checked out.

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Cherylene · 06/12/2016 17:08

My DS did not sit up until after he started crawling.

He never did anything in the right order. I would like to say that he is a perfectly normal adult, but he is doing that all wrong too Confused But I luffs him Grin

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BendingSpoons · 06/12/2016 17:16

Babies tend to focus on different skills. It sounds like your son has great communication skills (the high 5 and thumbs up) so maybe that is what he has focused on. As a baby I didn't walk until 19 months and was slow on other physical skills but was good at shape sorters etc. I have met other babies of that age who aren't sitting, you aren't the only one, although I imagine it can feel like it.

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chocolatecakemakesmefat · 06/12/2016 18:11

My son eventually sat at 9 months but didn't walk independently till 18 months he has developmental delay and also hyper mobility I would have her checked by a paed just to be on the safe side x

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purpleme12 · 06/12/2016 21:44

My child was 5 weeks early. She sat by herself a week before she turned 10 months. I was never worried cos I knew she was just on the late side of normal. They do say anything up to 10 months is actually normal for sitting, it's just not the usual. So I'd give it a bit longer and if still not sitting ring hv.

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mummybear1003 · 06/12/2016 22:04

Thank you everyone, it always stresses me so much when people are normally saying how early there baby did things. I want to enjoy him still being little and a baby but it is so so hard not to compare him to others his age at groups and stuff

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TynesideBlonde · 06/12/2016 22:19

My DS did not sit up til 10 months, never rolled over, wouldn't even lie on his front. One he could sit he reached further and further forward for objects until he ended up in a crawl position (which he did using one knee and one foot). He was walking when he was 14 months though. DD bumshuffling at 5 months, still bum shuffling at 15 months. It's a cliche but they really are all different.

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RatherBeRiding · 07/12/2016 12:13

My DS (now an adult) was "slow" to sit up and crawl (12 months) and didn't walk until 18 months. I was advised by paeds doctor that he was still within the "normal" spectrum.

And so it proved to be! Although his speech was also a little slow, once he was off and talking he proved to be a highly intelligent child, and grew up to be quite a sporty teen.

If your HV/GP aren't worried, then don't worry. What's "normal" covers a very wide spectrum. It's normal for some to be sitting up at four months, whilst others don't sit up till they are 12 months. My DD in contrast was crawling at 5 months, walked at 11 months.

If you look at them together now you would have no idea which one walked first!

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loveskaka · 05/09/2018 18:53

Have u put him in a walker, try strengthen his legs. X

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