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Finally at breaking point with DS(5). No idea where to go from here.

(7 Posts)
MollyHopps Mon 05-Sep-16 16:40:12

DS is 5 and has been at school for the past year (August baby).

As with any other child he would tantrum if he wasn't getting his own way. This had settled down a lot and we set out a rules and rewards system to combat things.

In the past 6 months he seems to have regressed. In fact, he is worse than he ever was. His tantrums have slowly become more physical and he will literally screech and cry while telling me how much he hates me. He doesn't hit me or anyone else but will hit whatever is around him or throw things and slam doors. Then, when it is over he will say sorry and go back to being "normal".

I don't know whats happened. He has always been a happy, relaxed child. When it started I prodded the school to see if anything had changed but they had nothing to report.

Today it has come to a head in a big way. First day back at school and he went in without a hitch. I went to pick him up and he was refusing to come out of the classroom and told his new teacher he didn't want to go home. We got him out of the classroom and he ran across the field away from me. I had to leave his sister in her pram with people I barely knew to get him. He refused to come with me and I had to drag him out of the playground. In front of the teacher he started screaming, literally screeching the word "No" and "I don't want to go home". He hit the pram a few times, threw his bag, clung onto anything he could grasp. It was horrific. If he hadn't been my little boy I would have thought he was terrified of coming home with me. He continued for about half an hour when we got home but has been calm and "wonderful" since.

We have always been consistent with him as parents and firm without being too strict. He responded really well at school when he started and is an absolute delight for everyone except for me. I don't know what has happened in the last 6 months to make him change like this.

Someone please, I am begging, help. I am sat here in tears because I just can't take it anymore. I feel sad sad that my own child has reacted like this to coming home and being honest I am so worried that SS are going to knock on the door sad

timelytess Mon 05-Sep-16 16:47:35

Are you hiding anything? Does he have reason to be terrified? If not, you have nothing to fear from SS. So put your mind at rest on that one.

It might be that school is very hard for him. Or that the change of environment and rules between home and school is difficult for him to cope with. How old is his sister?

An awful lot of children kick off at the end of the school day, after holding in all their emotions to be 'good' at school - could that be it?

Don't feel too bad about it. People will come along with suggestions, I'm sure.

Audreyhelp Mon 05-Sep-16 23:59:17

Hi shouldn't worry too much it sounds like a phase. Social services would get involved . Why don't you go into school and see if they can help and advise you.

user1470840482 Tue 06-Sep-16 21:16:14

Your post really resonated with me as my son can be similar , I have no advice unfortunately it seems to come and go in phases for us with no obvious triggers but it is incredibly emotionally draining especially when you have younger siblings too .

You are not alone

SealSong Tue 06-Sep-16 21:20:35

'Social services would get involved ' .....surely you meant to say 'would NOT get involved'? No reason for them to be involved at all, from what the OPs written.

SealSong Tue 06-Sep-16 21:21:40

OP did you ask him why he did not want to come home?

isthistoonosy Tue 06-Sep-16 21:25:02

How old is your second child, could it be jealousy? My eldest is much worse now dc2 isn't a real baby anymore.

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