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How to get DD to stop asking the same question over and over?

(18 Posts)
Letmesleepalready Thu 01-Sep-16 09:37:49

I'm fed up, tbh, she never seems to listen or take no for an answer, and she just bosses me around.
She'll say "I want to go to the park!!" To which I answer " we can go after I've done X" so the whole time I'm doing X she'll keep going on and on about wanting to go to the park. Drives me mad, because I've already answered, with a visible time scale (usually it's either needing to do the washing up, or changing a nappy) and by then I don't want to do what she's demanding (although the frustrating thing is that the park is pretty much the only time I'm not bombarded with questions and orders or having to stop fights between the DDs)
And when she asks a question and I answer, she'll then argue with my answer. Honestly it's exhausting, and my patience is completely gone by 8am every morning. So I then spend the rest of the day getting more and more angry, cue loads of screaming, which obviously don't help!
So how do I get her to understand my answer is finally? I'm thinking of implementing a "if you ask me one more time after I've answered then the answer is no" but that won't help as she'll just have a massive tantrum.

Letmesleepalready Thu 01-Sep-16 09:38:45


BarbarianMum Thu 01-Sep-16 11:11:44

How old is she?

Things that might work or might not

-Acknowledge how she's feeling "You really want to go to the park right now, don't you?" Then start a discussion about what she wants to do at the park, what she likes best about going there etc etc

-Ask her what she thinks the answer to the question is.

-Ask her to repeat back what you've told her.

-Tell her the subject is closed and ignore further discussion.

YouAreMyRain Thu 01-Sep-16 11:19:39

Yes, most importantly how old is she?

My 2yo does this I say "what did mummy just say?"

Letmesleepalready Thu 01-Sep-16 11:42:04

She's 4 (and should know better!) I've tried asking her to repeat what I've said to just get a very confused look as if I'd never said anything- as I said, she doesn't listen, which drives me mad. But I guess the discussion one might do the trick, as the others seem to either upset her or make me lose my patience.

GeneralBobbit Thu 01-Sep-16 11:55:32

Big excited voice "Yay, we're going to the park"

"Go and get your shoes"

"Go and get your (far away) cardigan"

"Go and get mummy's bag"

"Go and say goodbye to the birds"

Ad nauseum until it's actually time to go

I've had 15 minutes this way

Letmesleepalready Thu 01-Sep-16 12:20:26

I'll try that, hopefully we can break the cycle of whining and shouting!

Mybeardeddragonjustdied2016 Thu 01-Sep-16 12:21:35

Make a timetable. Draw the jobs that need done at the time then draw the park at the end!

imwithspud Thu 01-Sep-16 12:24:23

Sounds like my dd, she will be 4 in a few weeks. Drives me mad sometimes but I assumed it was normal. Following for extra tips! You're not alone.

Letmesleepalready Thu 01-Sep-16 21:34:25

I like the idea of the timetable, will see if that helps.
It's very hard work!

HandmaidsTail Thu 01-Sep-16 21:42:26

I just say 'I've already answered that' until I'm blue in the face.

Helgathehairy Mon 05-Sep-16 21:26:58

DD does this and drives me bonkers. She's 3. No advice, just in the same boat.

MyPeriodFeatures Tue 06-Sep-16 16:29:54

My son is three. This is us. It's fucking exhausting, nothing gets done, He speaks to me in this hideous demanding angry voice, bosses me around. Melts down over minor infringements - like not wanting a strawberry on his plate. Had epic whinges about tiny things, doesn't take no for an answer. Demands things and gets cross with me for things like putting his socks on wrong, the wrong colour cup, doing 'it wrong'. (Whatever 'it' is)

I am bloody exhausted, beyond exhausted! Feel like I can't do anything right and the flow of maternal love is dry at the moment.

I tell myself, this too shall pass.

Are you on your own?

MyPeriodFeatures Tue 06-Sep-16 16:31:06

....any I have armfuls of techniques but I'm tired!

MoreCoffeeNow Tue 06-Sep-16 16:31:57

When the big hand on the clock is at the top, as long as you don't ask again.

Letmesleepalready Thu 08-Sep-16 19:02:29

features I have a DH but she's a daddy's girl so behaves a lot better for him, and he has an ability to blank her which I can only dream of. (Although I'm not sure ignoring her works any better!)
I've just bought a book about strong willed children, in the hope we can make it work.
coffee I've started saying something along those lines, but I don't think she's getting it yet.

She's just started school, and her attitude after school is quite bad, probably due to tiredness, but it's exhausting for me!

MyPeriodFeatures Thu 08-Sep-16 20:19:26

That sounds great. Janet Lansbury is my new go-to Guru now! letmesleep

Eminado Mon 12-Sep-16 02:10:49



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