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Challenging toddler behaviour - help please

(3 Posts)
Taler Tue 30-Aug-16 20:42:04

Hi, am writing this post on behalf of my friend. She is heavily pregnant with her second child, has just moved home and is exhausted but mostly from the challenging behaviours of her son (who is 2 and a half years old).

He hits. And she has tried lots of things! I really really feel for her sad

He is a bit of a nightmare too when it come to sharing. And yes, I know that's pretty normal and that they don't really get sharing but he is just clearly has real issues with it.

The hitting is the main concern though, especially with the imminent arrival of her second child and really needs to be nipped in the bud asap.

She has tried time out several times. She acknowledges she needs to be consistent but says every time she puts him there he comes out.

She's taken away privileges but says that's doesn't seem to bother him at all.

He has a lot of tantrums too. I witnessed one today when we arrived at their new home. Initially he was really excited to see my daughter but within no time at all he turned, for what appeared to be no reason, hitting his mum and at the same time asking for a cuddle from her while putting his arms up to her to be picked up.

She's tried ignoring the bad/unwanted behaviours but hitting shouldn't be ignored!

Any advice would be very welcome.

TIA

VioletBam Wed 31-Aug-16 01:27:30

Well it's just normal 2 year old behaviour. The only way past it is to be consistent. So bad behaviour gets ignored. Hitting needs to be met with a firm NO! Not shouting but a stern voice and then I used to follow that up with removing them from what they were doing.

Putting them out of the room briefly or away from the action.

Then reinforcing good behaviour with "Play nicely, be gentle"

Instruct in what you want them to do...not with what you don't want them to do.

So instead of "No hitting!" we say "Be gentle" or "Share nicely"

YokoUhOh Wed 31-Aug-16 02:08:34

It's a phase, and totally normal.

^Good suggestions from PP. The best thing your friend can do is praise absolutely all the good behaviour to the hilt and ignore the hitting by removing/distracting the child (after he has been told a firm 'no').

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