When do kids start using the toilet completely independently?

(17 Posts)
kivvi Thu 02-Jun-16 19:18:41

DD is 3.4 and has been out of nappies for over a year. She now uses toilet with trainer seat - but we still wipe her. At roughly what age can we start to let her use the toilet completely independently (i.e., wipe herself, wash and dry her hands)? Obviously it depends somewhat on the kid, but I'm guessing most can do this by the time they go to school, yes? Just not sure if we should be pushing it yet or if it's too early still...

JinRamen Thu 02-Jun-16 19:36:32

I can't remember with my first two but my youngest still wants me to come to the toilet with her at six! :/ she does everything herself but I have to sit in the step sigh.

AppleMagic Thu 02-Jun-16 19:47:22

My dd is approaching 4.5yrs and we have started pushing this just now (in my defence it took from 2.5-3.5 for her to get potty training so I've just been relieved that she can tell when she needs to go). Now she reluctantly gets on withbitbherself when she wees but isn't very good at wiping poos so we still do that. Hand washing is fine, she often needs reminding to flush.

Can your dd physically do it all? In our old house the taps were old fashioned and hard to turn and the flush was hard for her to reach as she couldn't get her stool near it as very small bathroom.

BrightandEarly Thu 02-Jun-16 20:39:04

DD (nearly 4) manages by herself at nursery where basins etc are low. At home we help her still. I must say her wiping after a poo isn't brilliant yet...

kivvi Fri 03-Jun-16 11:44:29

Thanks for your replies. I think maybe we could start gently encouraging her to do more things by herself and work towards it. Will ask nursery what they think she's capable of too! She can reach the taps, flush, soap, towel etc at home but I'm not sure if the step is too heavy for her...

My motivation is partly selfish as we are expecting DC2 soon, and I can just foresee that the moment I get settled to feed him/her, DD will announce that she needs a wee and I'll need to traipse upstairs with her!! Ah well, I suppose I should be grateful that it's not traipsing outside like in the days of loos at the end of the garden! How our foremothers managed, I have no idea!

SoupDragon Fri 03-Jun-16 11:48:31

Mine were completely independent shortly before they went into reception. I went for a gradual handing over of responsibility with me just checking after they'd done it for a while. I must say, the delight of wiping my last bottom that wasn't my own was a simply wonderful feeling!

I do think their little arms aren't long enough to reach their bottoms for a while after potty training.

Cakescakescakes Fri 03-Jun-16 11:52:13

My DS has autism and is 5.5 and still needs assistance. Prob depends on the child when they are ready eg to remember all the steps they need to do etc.

VanellopeVonSchweetz99 Fri 03-Jun-16 13:21:33

DS2 is in reception and totally independent. DS1 is in year 2 and prefers a little wiping assistance still (has v short arms!).

uhoh2016 Fri 03-Jun-16 18:55:07

Could you go to the toilet with her get her to have a go at wiping herself and only get involved maybe with numbers 2s after she's had a go herself. So your verbally involved prompting her on what to do but only physically get involved if it's a messy situation. You'll find she will eventually take herself although the toilet may not be flushed and the tap left running as my 6yo sometimes does!

theplaneisbetter Tue 07-Jun-16 20:09:28

My 4yo is proudly independent about half the time, the other times he insists I help!

theplaneisbetter Tue 07-Jun-16 20:09:51

(He's just 4 btw.)

Notfastjustfurious Tue 07-Jun-16 20:15:50

Dd is 4.2 and does it all herself, sometimes struggles to flush and doesn't always do a great job with a poo but is very insistant she no longer wants assistance. Unless there's a button on her trousers she can't manage. This is fairly recent though and without any prompting from us.

Chilver Tue 07-Jun-16 20:20:56

3.5 to 4 here (can't remember the exact gage but she's 4 and a quarter now and seems to have been going herself for ages).what helped us was flushable toilet wipes for poos as that was the only bit we'd been helping her with for the past year. Has to tell her to wipe until clean otherwise it was just one wipe and done!!

Paulat2112 Tue 07-Jun-16 20:23:11

Ds2 is almost three and he can do it all himself. Ds1 is 4.5 and was about the same age altho he does like me to check after a poop lmao

Iguessyourestuckwithme Tue 07-Jun-16 20:26:33

dc 2.6 can take herself to the toilet by herself, do her business and then wipe herself for a wee or call for help with a poo and then pull up knickers/trousers by herself.

She's been out of nappies since February half term and has been taking herself for the past month.

macoronicheese2015 Wed 08-Jun-16 10:59:20

My son was definitely going on his own without even telling me aged 5 I think when he got to school he started going without a peep end of nursery he didn't need any wiping etc but he did say mummy I'm going to the toilet (sometimes can you take me ) but I just had to stand there and help with hands so I'd say around 4,4 half maybe earlier for girls from what I hear xx

waitingforsomething Fri 10-Jun-16 05:50:35

Ds is 3.7 and stopped asking for help around 2 months ago.
She was potty trained at 2.5.

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