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nightmare bedtime with 2 yr old

(17 Posts)
LimesMum Fri 20-May-16 20:25:37

Please please please can someone help me with this?!!

My 2 yr old has gone from being put down in bed and going straight to sleep to being put down, standing up jumping up and down in bed revising to sleep, persistently calling for us to go up to her until she goes completely INSANE!!

We could end up going in 10 times...

Have now tried to leave her longer as it's got to the point she just knows we will go back up but she gets so incredibly worked up that she is going to either hurt herself or vomit so we end up having to go in.

Feel like I've tried everything and am at my wits end, I'm 33 weeks pregnant and exhausted and I'm not getting dinner until 930 at night

I just end up getting so cross confused

Artandco Fri 20-May-16 20:27:19

Leave her up later. Eat your dinner at 7pm with her or whilst she plays. Let her naturally tire herself out then put to bed later when she's more tired, you have eaten, and everyone less stressed

LimesMum Fri 20-May-16 20:32:40

Thanks, could try that but she is definitely very tired, over tired I would even say. But going to bed earlier or later seems to make zero difference

2snugglets Fri 20-May-16 20:33:39

This the same for me with my two year old. We just cut her nap and she's asking to go to bed at 6:30 now.... It's bliss.

LimesMum Fri 20-May-16 20:36:35

I was wondering about that but she has been at nursery today and only had a half hour nap, she also gets up at 5am so you would think she would be tired by now!!

WhirlwindHugs Fri 20-May-16 20:38:49

My 2.5 year old is like this at the minute. She's in the middle of dropping her nap, if she sleeps after lunch at all she is a nightmare at bedtime. A short nap in the morning seems to be okay though, and she will go to bed about 6.30 and fall asleep without screaming and shouting about it.

Artandco Fri 20-May-16 20:44:22

Can you get her ready for bed in pjs etc, and then let her play alone in her bed with teddies etc or look at books? So you can read and say goodnight, then if she doesn't want to sleep say ok you can play in your bed a little while and then sleep once tired?

Mine would often decide they wanted to look at a book alone instead of sleep, then fall asleep with book within 10 mins. Where's wally books were great as loads they can look at but no words

Notso Fri 20-May-16 20:50:56

Eat your dinner earlier then go to bed with her.

LimesMum Fri 20-May-16 20:56:06

Ive tried giving her books or toys in bed to look at on her own. She keeps saying I'm not tired mummy so put books etc in and said its ok just play in your cot until you feel tired. But doesn't seem to work.

I'll try to eat earlier but I don't get home from work til 645 then after bath teeth getting dressed battle and getting her into her bed and reading stories then the bedtime screaming match its always 9pm!

Cliffdiver Fri 20-May-16 21:24:38

Op, I went though the same with DD2 the week of her second birthday.

One night she was going to sleep as normal the next she was screaming for me not to leave the room.

I found a couple of old threads on here and also spoke to some friends and the general consensus seemed to be it's a phase and it won't last long and it's a normal developmental milestone.

The main this is to not let her get upset. Stay with her, hold her hand and reassure her you're there. I was worried that by doing this I was regressing back and would have to be in with her at bedtime for an hour every night.

Luckily this wasn't the case, and within a week or so she was back to normal. I made a point of going into her room after a couple of minutes saying 'mummy is just outside, tidying' for a couple of days when all was back to normal to reassure her.

Fingers crossed this is the case for you and it will be short lived!

In the meantime, could you switch meals around so you have a dinner at lunchtime so you're not so hungry. Perhaps bring something into DD's room you can snack on whilst your in with her. Something quiet like cheese?

LimesMum Fri 20-May-16 21:33:24

Thanks cliffdiver

She doesn't seem upset when I'm in there only when I go to leave.

Interesting you say to stay with her as tonight my husband did that and rubbed her back for a while and she wasn't asleep but calmed right down and then he was able to leave and she went off.

I got really cross with him and said he was making a rod for our own backs... Maybe he wasn't?!

HoggleHoggle Fri 20-May-16 21:58:33

We've been having this for 4-6 weeks now with 2.4 year old ds. It's related to dropping his nap, he needs one still but it plays havoc with bedtime. I'm staying firm at him going to bed at 7pm because it's best for him and best for us - we need some adult time alone and to relax in the evening. I'm hoping by just keeping on with the routine as it stands things will go back to normal soon...also I think the nap will drop within the next few months anyway.

Some things I've found which help...
Do give a bit of extra comfort if needed but nothing too major. I agree with not making a rod for your own back but I do sit with ds for a bit if he needs to allow himself to calm down into sleep.

Try not to get cross. It makes everything so much worse and makes it a power struggle, which it really doesn't need to be.

Keep calm and keep reiterating its bedtime and sleepy time. If ds starts to take the piss a bit about calling me up again and again for no reason, I get firmer and say 'mummy is going downstairs now and I don't want to be called up again'. This is usually enough especially as by this point he is genuinely getting tired.

None of the above have 'solved' the problem but it isn't getting any worse and bedtimes are still calm. It's not developed into a battle of wills which I'm pleased about, it's just that ds needs less sleep now but not so little that we can cut the nap just yet. It'll all change again before you know it. That's what I'm telling myself, anyway.

LimesMum Sat 21-May-16 12:02:09

Thanks!! Will try anything!!!!

lornathewizzard Sat 21-May-16 12:22:37

DD is 22mo and we've been having a similar situation lately. Sometimes she falls asleep on her own, other times she's shouting for me straight away and telling me to sit! So I sit haha.
I wasn't keen to sit with her as when she was younger we did this and it would take 45mins to an hour, and it does eat into your evening. But so far she's generally been asleep within 10-15mins.
However I must admit if she's kicking off and won't settle then I put her in our bed. I'm 29 weeks pregnant and don't have the fight in me! Not that I ever really did tbh!

LimesMum Sat 21-May-16 12:45:29

I'd be happy to take her into my bed or sit with her but she won't sleep with either!

We are now having a repeat performance for her nap... Naps have never been an issue! Arghhhhh give me strength! I need her to sleep as we have a party at 5pm otherwise I'd just try no nap today!

InsaneDame Sat 21-May-16 12:56:39

My 2.1yo is taking longer to go to sleep for nap and at bedtime but I'm still able to pop him in his cot and leave him to chatter himself to sleep no matter how long it takes him! I think it's all related to needing a nap but not needing a nap iyswim? I expect the nap will be gone in the next few months but I want to keep him napping through the summer so he can go to bed later while the weather is warm/nice.... not that it is either atm!

Toiletseatgoesdown Wed 06-Jul-16 11:12:30

We are going through this exact same thing, it's driving me insane!

did you find something that worked for you or is it still going on? We are at 3 weeks of it now getting worse. She's waking up constantly through the night too... I'm 27 weeks pregnant, single, exhausted and emotional! ❤️

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