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twin birthday party etiquette

(16 Posts)
waitingforsomething Wed 20-Apr-16 05:57:04

Dd has just been invited to a 4th birthday party for twin boys. What's normal: joint present? 2 presents the same? 2 presents different? We haven't known them long so I can't really vouch for whether the boys have similar or different interests.

NickNacks Wed 20-Apr-16 06:15:27

Can you ask their mum?

NormHonal Wed 20-Apr-16 06:23:00

Ask the mum.

I know one mum of twins who is adamant that her children be treated as individuals and so expects separate presents.

With boys that age a little Lego set each can't possibly go wrong.

But, if separate presents are not required, and if they don't have them yet, a set of walkie talkies to share (children's ones) or an Orchard Games game would work without you having to spend twice as much. Separate cards though.

goshhhhhh Wed 20-Apr-16 06:29:52

Unless it is a big asked for present - separate presents. Always separate cards - nothing worse than getting one to 'the twins'. It's not a voluntary partnership like a marriage.

JimbosJetSet Wed 20-Apr-16 06:29:58

We've just had a similar invite! The twins are in separate classes though, I don't know if that makes a difference. I think I'm planning to buy a present for the girl in DD's class, and a token gift (eg bag of sweets) for her sister.

magratsflyawayhair Wed 20-Apr-16 06:37:00

I only know one set of twins and they are the children of my best mate. I buy two gifts, one each, something different for each. They are two different people, so unless I was asked specifically to get one joint thing that they wanted I'd stick with that.

Handsupbabyhandsup Wed 20-Apr-16 06:47:38

I have twins and it doesn't matter at all to us if people get separate or combined presents.

VashtaNerada Wed 20-Apr-16 07:03:14

I'd get separate & similar (two jigsaws or Orchard games maybe).

HappyAsASandboy Wed 20-Apr-16 07:04:24

I am a mum of twins. Personally I (and they!) don't mind whether presents/cards are joint or separate. They are just very excited about everything.

I would try to be guided by the invitation. If it says "YourDaughter is invited to Twin1s birthday party" then get a present for Twin1 and perhaps a notional present for Twin2. If it says "YourDaughter is invited to Twin and Twin's birthday party" the get two?

Last birthday we had to navigate the Reception year party. Early in the school year, so no idea who was friends with who and the 'best friends' changed twice a day. We went for a joint, whole two classes party! To avoid receiving 2x30 presents each, I tried to steer by Twin1 inviting their class and Twin2 inviting their class, with no mention of the other twin on the invitation at all. Most kids brought one present for the twin who had invited them, some brought two presents. We were glad to receive all presents but where pleased to receive closer to 60 presents in total than 120 presents!

ChubbyPolecat Wed 20-Apr-16 07:08:16

The parents of twins might not care about joint presents but a lot of twins do...I know I certainly did! Unless it's something like a board game or walkie talkies they can play with together I would go with separate presents

Notso Wed 20-Apr-16 07:10:10

I always treat twins or triplets as DD had in her class, the same way I would if it was a joint party for any other siblings.

namechangedtoday15 Wed 20-Apr-16 07:18:12

Twin and mum of twins. Separate presents every time (even if just a bag of sweets). It's the pleasure of receiving something just for you and unwrapping it yourself.

But as previous poster said, be guided by invitation and extent to which your DC knows both twins (eg have often received invitation which says no presents / token gifts only / only bring one unnamed present and they'll be shared out at the end).

OnTique Wed 20-Apr-16 07:42:05

Separate cards and presents.

MattDillonsPants Wed 20-Apr-16 10:51:19

My DD has very good twin friends and her Mum always split the invitations down the middle when she had parties...each twin invited half the group...then on the invitation it would say "Please only buy a gift for the twin which invited you."

Very sensible. Both girls got an equal amount of gifts and nobody had to buy two!

Comiconce Wed 20-Apr-16 11:53:49

Matt that sounds like a brilliant solution.

I used to know someone who made a big deal of their twins being individuals and expected individual cards and presents. Funnily enough when invited to other children's parties they gave one gift to the birthday child, from 'the twins'. Also once suggested a joint party with my dc but expected to pay half the cost. (I respectfully declined).

waitingforsomething Wed 20-Apr-16 12:02:45

Thanks all! She knows the boys recently through where we live rather than one of them through school she doesn't know one better than the other!
I think I will go for a little lego set and card each, thinking about it if I was a 4 year old with a twin I think I'd be secretly upset if I didn't get my own present! Thanks for thoughts.

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