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12 year old boy constantly being silly

(5 Posts)
CountryLovingGirl Mon 14-Mar-16 06:54:35

Hi,

My son has just turned 12 last week and started year 7 last September. He is a bright child but acts very silly a lot of the time, especially when he has an audience. He has always been like this! He has a 7 year old sister (8 soon) and she is starting to copy his behaviour.

The secondary school he attends give them a diary for homework and also for teachers to write any concerns about behaviour. Every week at least 2 teachers have put in about silly behaviour (things like being silly in the line up to class/at lunch; throwing a highlighter across a room; pulling ties off). They are starting to get fed up ('extremely concerned') and I have already been called into school about this. He is top set for maths and won the mathematics award for the whole primary school last summer (and, won an award for determination). He has always been difficult to raise in comparison to his sister - not in a bad way, just that he is like a live wire. We did mention it to the GP when he was younger but he just dismissed it and said he was a highly spirited, intelligent child (and that he would calm down by the time he was 9 - he didn't). He doesn't show other signs of ADHD - he is just the class joker! When he was in year 6 they did a 'leaver's book' for each child where the other children had to write a few words about him. Every one of them said that he was 'very funny' and 'hilarious' so it's pretty obvious he has entertained them for a few years!

Now he is 12 I really want him to calm himself and start acting responsibly (as it's getting annoying now). He loves to make people laugh. His last head teacher (male) said he has a wicked sense of humour but that there is a time and a place...what my son failed to grasp!

His new (young, early 20's) form tutor is getting fed up of him. Her comments, in the diary, are becoming more frequent. I have tried so hard to get him to grow up a bit but it seems to be failing. He has complained that his form tutor shouts at all the boys and the girls get away with things. His form is made up of 10 boys and 17 girls (only 3 other boys are from his primary - it's an outstanding Catholic secondary). One of the other parents has said her son has complained about her shouting at the boys. Whether this is her first form and she is showing her authority (good on her I say)...sounds like it.

Will he mature rapidly soon?

The school is a fantastic. They are one of the best performing schools in the country. I keep telling him that he is so lucky to go there and that he should make the most of his time there. He does well in school, academically, but needs to act more responsibly. Any ideas?

MattDillonsPants Mon 14-Mar-16 07:30:21

Get him into a good drama club or youth theatre...not a Stagecoach or Theatre Train place but a youth theatre. He sounds like he needs an outlet for his creative energy.

CountryLovingGirl Mon 14-Mar-16 18:40:01

Good idea. I'll look into that :-)

lavenderhoney Wed 06-Apr-16 20:14:20

The form teacher shouldn't be shouting at anyone. That would concern me they can't control themselves so how on earth could they expect a child to do so. Also she is encouraging drama and making it ok to scream and shout to get control.

I would complain about it, tbh, and work on your ds doing a drama club or something - but he needs a teacher who is calm and helps him calm down by example not shouting at the boys!

Spandexpants007 Wed 06-Apr-16 20:24:25

I wonder if she feels out of her depth. Shouting = loss of control. However it sounds like she's got her hands full! Maybe she needs support? There's a lot to learn when new to teaching.

Yes your son should be behaving. Is there any chance he finds the work too easy? Is he disrespectful/silly in the company of female adults particularly?

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