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Behaviour/development

If your toddler has a dummy, how strictly do you restrict it's use?

12 replies

SnozzberryWibble · 04/03/2016 16:17

My 21 month old is very attached to his dummy. He's fine without it when we're out having fun but as soon as he gets through the door at home he associates home with dummy, and I always give in as it's just easier... Am I being too soft? Should I be more strict at limiting it to bedtime and naptimes? I'd have to actually prise it out of his mouth when he wakes up! He asks for it when I hide it.

Does it really matter anyway, or should I be more strict?

OP posts:
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Jw35 · 04/03/2016 16:40

My eldest had a dummy until she was 3 years and 3 months. By about 18 months she just had it for naps and bedtime. With hindsight though I could have got rid of it sooner. I didn't give my next baby a dummy and it's so much easier!

Personally I'd be stricter, put away after a nap etc. over dependence on it so regularly is probably not great but it's not the worst thing in the world and he's not even 2 yet. Mm sorry I'm a bit vague! I guess what I'm saying is it's not a biggie but you probably 'should' restrict it.

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Lj8893 · 04/03/2016 16:49

My dd is 2 and a bit and has a dummy at night and if she naps which is rare! Occasionally she might have it in the car if it's a longish journey and she's getting angsty.

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Lj8893 · 04/03/2016 16:50

My plan is when she is a little older and understands a bit better, I'm going to say it's a special night as the dummy fairy is coming to take her dummy as she's a big girl and doesn't need it anymore. Hope that works!

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Twinklestar2 · 04/03/2016 16:53

My 18-month old has his for naps and bedtime. He sometimes has it at the end of the day if he is getting tired and I'm trying to stretch 10 mins out of him cause I'm finishing my dinner before bathtime!

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amyboo · 05/03/2016 05:35

My 3 year-old DS2 has a dummy - only for naps (he atill has a midday nap) and bedtime. It gets put away as soon as he's up and about. I would take it away but he still naps and at school (he's in kindergarten here in Belgium), lots of the kids in his class still have them. We've told him it's got to go before he goes back to school in September.

DS1 gave up his dummy just after his 3rd birthday, but that was easier as he had stopped napping completely.

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tinymeteor · 05/03/2016 07:58

Mine is 22 months and has it for naps and bedtime, and some car journeys. And when she's poorly. She knows they are in a drawer the rest of the time but she can't have them.

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1lov3comps · 05/03/2016 08:08

DD had her until 2.5, was very attached, I never tried restricting it and then soother fairy came and took it. First night was tough going and getting to sleep the second night was a little bit harder than normal but grand otherwise.
DS is now 22 months and isn't anywhere near as attached but has it whenever he wants. I'll do the same and get rid of it when he's about 2.5.
I don't sometimes understand people's attitudes to soothers, my CM seems massively proud to tell me DS hasn't used his much during a particular day! My mil is another one who makes a big show out if taking it off him saying 'big boys don't need soothers' (this bugs me for many reasons!!) but then she's the first one reaching for it at the first sign of tiredness/grumpiness etc.
Once he's happy I'm happy Smile

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Jesabel · 05/03/2016 16:29

Bed and car only from 18 months.

1lov3 - people don't like toddlers to have dummies in their mouths all day because it hinders speech and damages teeth.

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purpleme12 · 05/03/2016 20:03

I don't restrict it as much as I should. We have had times where she's only had it at bed and in pushchair and car but now she's just so moany and crying at everything so yes she has had her dummy more. Blush

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1lov3comps · 05/03/2016 21:28

Ah Jesabel I know that SmileMy mil annoys me cause she was so preachy about my DD having her soother but when it came to my SIL's DD (so mil's daughters daughter) she had it until she was 5 but nothing was ever said - pics of her with it in school uniform and all!
Don't get me wrong, when I say I didn't restrict DD, I mean I gave it to her if she looked for it but I didn't shove it in her mouth every waking moment and I took it out of her mouth when she was talking

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ManneryTowers · 07/03/2016 19:01

DS had a dummy until 26 months. We reduced dummy time to sleeping/bed only and then they were put away. He had a habit of chewing through the teat so we stopped replacing them. He threw the last one in the bin himself when it broke and that was it. We didn't pressure or bribe, but we were firm. If he has ever asked for his dummy since we remind him he threw it away because it was yucky. He stopped asking after about three weeks. That was about two months ago.

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Tangoandcreditcards · 07/03/2016 19:09

DS1 25mo.

Has it for night and naps (but has one in his mouth and one in each hand 😳). He hands them over pretty sharpish as soon as he's up and they are put away.

Pretty strict about not having it at other times, but I've let the time between (early) waking and breakfast go recently (I've got a newborn and DS1's been teething, so whatever works!).

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