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Four year old has scratched his face to bits during a tantrum

(3 Posts)
Fedup83 Sat 30-Jan-16 15:11:37

We don't know what to do.

His face was already a mess after falling over at school and then another incident the following day.

I'm not sure if he's taken that sympathy and seen it as a way to try and invoke it in anger but we're absolutely gutted about it.

Aside from the fact that we just feel out of control with it his face looks a total state.

Help.

KingLooieCatz Mon 01-Feb-16 13:14:35

Not sure what to suggest, but at a similar age, our DS fell over, had a wee cry and was given a chocolate (by someone else) it was a matter of minutes before he "fell" again and was apparently inconsolable. Just remembered another similar occasion when DS hurt himself somehow, Dad gave him a sweetie, DS ran out the room and while he was out I told Dad that was a really daft thing to do, Dad poo poo'd me and within moments DS was back with another "injury". We don't make a habit of giving him sweeties to make him feel better and faking injuries hasn't been repeated.

So I guess what I'm saying is he might be trying to re-create a situation where he was the centre of attention/got sympathy/got away with behavior he might otherwise have been scolded for.

Could it be he's growing/a little stressed by something/tired for some reason? That might make him more clumsy, frustrated and possibly more likely to resort to unhealthy means of having his needs (as he sees them) met?

I'm no child psychologist, the only thing I can think is to stay calm if he sustains an injury at all and try and sort him out in as calm and matter of fact a manner as possible. And maybe try to give him opportunities to talk about how his feelings when he is calm and relaxed. We sometimes use soft toys to play out stuff that's happened, we don't say we're playing out stuff that's happened, we might say "This teddy has fallen over again! Does he want a cuddle? Teddy can have a cuddle any time, can't he!". Short version but you get the idea.

Fedup83 Mon 01-Feb-16 22:29:06

Thank you! Fab ideas. His face is looking much better now.

It was one of those parenting moments when me and DH were just totally in shock. He was in the back of the car and so there was just nothing we could do!

Going to re read - and definitely try the teddy thing. smile

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