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8mo ds wakes every 1-2hrs all night. Any help at all would be much appreciated.

(18 Posts)
TheKitchenWitch Mon 28-Dec-15 16:47:28

He basically wakes up (and usually stands up) every time he repositions himself. He's not properly awake as such, He just doesn't seem able to resettle himself. If I don't get up and either rock or feed him, he wakes up properly and cries.
While I realise it could be so much worse (at least he wants to sleep!), I am never getting a block of proper sleep and it is absolutely knackering.
Any ideas? I'll try anything that doesn't involve letting him cry!

Flamingo1980 Mon 28-Dec-15 20:59:49

'He doesn't seem to be able to resettle himself' - That's because YOU are settling him so of course he can't learn to do this for himself can he? Don't rock him or feed him. If you won't leave him to settle himself then do more subtle things like just pat his back or shush him. It's you that's keeping this cycle going at the moment by the sounds of things.
Speak to your HV for further advice that's what they're there for.

cricketqueen Mon 28-Dec-15 21:12:43

Not exactly helpful comment. My 10 month old struggles with self soothing; she will sometimes go to sleep with a quick shush and patting on the stomach other times she will scream and scream and no amount of shushing will calm her down so I have to pick her up. Try shushing/ patting, it may take some time and it won't always work.

TheHouseofMirth Mon 28-Dec-15 21:21:25

At 8 months old my son was waking every 45 minutes. It seemed to coincide with him learning to crawl and he'd often wake up and start crawling off. Finally, after almost falling totally apart due to sleep deprivation, I started co-sleeping with him. This seemed to do the trick and he soon passed through this phase.

Pam0077 Mon 28-Dec-15 22:00:53

Yes my ten month old went through this with every milestone eg rolling, sitting and trying to crawl in his sleep. He settled after this phase then it starts again after a new milestone starts. We also have little success settling him without picking up and a feed. He can self settle well as does this for periods then will regress. I think it's prob quite normal, but exhausting for us!

TheKitchenWitch Tue 29-Dec-15 18:01:38

Well, he doesn't settle himself, so I don't see what choice I have: if he's standing up in his cot, he's only going to get more upset if I don't come.
It's heartening to hear that this is a phase linked to development. He is crawling like mad and cruising along furniture, so very much in the Look At Me I'm Mobile stage.
We have been co sleeping and i still do bring him over to our bed early on the morning, but I think sleeping next to me woke him up more often as he hears every sound.

Pidapie Thu 31-Dec-15 12:32:57

We had a while 8-12 months that was horrendous. We co-sleep, but he would often wake up and stay awake. It does pass, but it's terrible. I don't have any advice, other than it does get better. And the probably worse for a little while, and then better again. It's all phases. Hope you get some rest soon!

TheKitchenWitch Sat 02-Jan-16 19:22:32

I think I know there's nothing I can actually do about it, I was just hoping maybe somebody might suggest something I hadn't tried yet!
"It's just a phase" is a much-repeated mantra in this house...

thisismypassword Sat 02-Jan-16 19:27:47

With my first it was the 9 month mark that was the douzy. You've just gotta get through it as sometimes there's no solution

NeitherQuietNorCalm Sat 02-Jan-16 22:07:06

Solidarity fist bump. My 10mo is bored of crawling and cruising in his cot so now constantly wakes up crying but then looks adorable and sweet all sat up in his cot. Nothing to be done but laying him back down. He did this when he learned to crawl, it'll pass.

Frazzled2207 Sun 03-Jan-16 07:44:18

My 7mo is terrible too. However I have had some success teaching him to self-settle and he's a bit better too. I've only done the "training" at nap times as i also have a 2yo and can't face the baby waking him in the night but have seen improvement at night now. Google "pick up put down". It works, and you don't leave the room so although they get upset they never get inconsolable. He will never learn to self settle unless you let him.
We eventually had to let our 2yo CIO, horrid but it worked. Convinced me that i would not wait that long to train dc2.

Luckygirlcharlie Sun 03-Jan-16 10:38:26

I would definitely not feed him under any circs. If absolutely necessary give him a bit of water. He should hopefully learn food is for day time that way. Also try the staged withdrawal thing. If you have to go in, lie him down and shush him / Rub head etc and then leave. Leave it longer each time until he stops. We did this with DS and he was fine from about 6 mths. Andrea Grace is a good one. Good luck. If definitely will pass.

TheKitchenWitch Thu 07-Jan-16 08:04:13

Ah see I'm probably my own worst enemy because I think if baby wants boob then baby should get boob. And I cannot let him cry. He wants or needs something (me usually) and that's the only way he can express himself.
I did exactly the same with ds1, and he also just naturally stopped wanting feeding in the night.
I just wish I could show ds2 that he doesn't immediately have to stand up as soon as he's even a little bit awake. He can't settle if he's standing in his cot!

jbee1979 Thu 07-Jan-16 14:08:17

I wholehearted agree with you Kitchenwitch - I read that children don't truly self settle until they can reason with themselves "that's not a monster, that's the toilet flushing". It'll stop, feed him back to sleep and try to get over again yourself, as quickly as possible - you'll be up again in 2 hours! My DD is the same, 8 months, not pulling herself up, but twisting and calling "da-da" - because she can and she's excited about it! I Shhhh her, feed her, calm her down and she's sleeping again. I read an article about giving your baby what they want - if I can find it I'll paste it. Remember the all night cluster feeds? They stopped, I'm sure this will too - I just try not to fight it, there's no reasoning with her - she's too wee!

jbee1979 Thu 07-Jan-16 14:09:52

TheKitchenWitch Thu 21-Jan-16 11:25:33

So it's almost a month on and in that time ds2 has cut 2 more teeth and is even more mobile, which I'm sure is playing a part in his night time wakings. It's not got at all better, although I'm trying to make sure he has two proper day naps at least, and that seems to be slowly improving from 15mins or so to an hour each time.
Has anyone tried Elizabeth Pantley's No Cry Sleep Solution? We had 11 wakings last night between bed at 7.45 and up for the day at 6.20am. sad

austengirl Thu 21-Jan-16 15:08:17

Have you checked out the Sleep section? FATEDestiny has some good/useful info about sleep and mentions the Pantley method.

TheKitchenWitch Thu 21-Jan-16 17:29:22

Ah see, I did not even realise there WAS a sleep section. Off to investigate. Ta very much!

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