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Discipline tips for 20 month old

(9 Posts)
Cupcakemumma123 Wed 16-Dec-15 19:02:41

Hi there, my dd is 20 months and I'm looking for advice of appropriate discipline for this age group. She's beginning to show defiance at times eg/ I say no and she does it anyway with a big grin on her face. Also when playing with other children she's not got the concept of sharing yet, is this normal? It's hard because she obvs doesn't have the language skills for me to explain why she shouldn't do something yet. Tips appreciated x

winchester1 Wed 16-Dec-15 19:09:35

By that age id say no and move them away if they continued anyway. But mostly just kept him busy with 'jobs' and games.

I would still explain why in simple terms eg no don't touch everyone wants to see the pretty bauble.
It will not be long before she does understand a bit.

CultureSucksDownWords Wed 16-Dec-15 19:10:21

What do you do currently when she continues when you've said no? And what do you do if she doesn't share/play nicely with other children?

Cel982 Wed 16-Dec-15 19:13:42

They don't get sharing for ages yet, don't worry - that's perfectly normal.

Jw35 Wed 16-Dec-15 19:19:14

Sharing takes a long time! Around 3 years old. She won't understand it at all at this age. Personally I'd just distract or move away from something/take something away at this age. Don't say no if she's going to grin at you or it becomes a game. No needs to be used sparingly I think

Marcipex Wed 16-Dec-15 19:27:14

Not sharing is totally normal at this age, I'd actually expect them to not share! Most children don't get it until at least 3, if not more.

As for continuing to do what you've told her not to; I read some good advice years ago, to react as if it was a hot stove .......so you'd jump up, dash to grab her back, be very emphatic......
That makes your message very clear. Much more than just saying it, your actions speak louder than words.
Also, distract, keep busy, have the next task lined up smile
(The socks need pairing, the leaves need catching, Mrs next-door needs a picture, teddy could do with a brush-up)

winchester1 Wed 16-Dec-15 21:43:31

The hot stove makes sense as we have a hot stove/wood burner and that's how we have taught no.
My two yr old def understood not to sntvh toys and to bring a new toy if he wanted to swap.with someone not much older than that.

Bettercallsaul1 Wed 16-Dec-15 23:16:56

Love your distracting ideas, Marcipex! Especially "the leaves need catching"!

Clobbered Wed 16-Dec-15 23:20:58

I think positive requests for your child to do something rather than telling them not to do something are more helpful -
eg come away from there, take your hand off that, put it back, sit down, put your coat back on etc etc. "No" or "Stop" can be used for dangerous or urgent situations and are more powerful if they aren't heard all the time.
Distraction and praise are the best tools!

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