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7 year old never works to best of his ability

(5 Posts)
Ickythumpsmum Wed 25-Nov-15 19:42:17

This is a small problem in the scale of things, I'm just posting because we had a disagreement tonight and he's gone to bed crying. I feel bad for him, and want to know what other people do in this situation.

He's smart, to the point where school work is easy. He's big and strong, so sport at his level is easy. He is a lucky boy to be in such a position, and I am happy for him, but it means he never has to try and he is developing an annoying attitude.

Tonight he had to learn the words to a song. We read through the words, but he wasn't actually reading, just relying on memory so making a few mistakes. Mistakes that he wouldn't have made if he would focus and read (which he can do). We went through it 4 times with his lazy attitude, and by the last time he started going 'something, something, something' in an arrogant way, so I said we were going to stop working now and we could try again tomorrow if he was ready to work and had a better attitude.

Well, he started crying and sulking and begging to do it properly. He won't like being unprepared, because he has the reputation of being good at things.

I felt like a bitch, but I want him to learn that he has to approach things with a good attitude first time. That he can't mess around and waste people's time, and then take it seriously when he wants. Am I right? Or am I being harsh?
This attitude is creeping in more and more and I think it's because I normally backtrack and let him try again after he's messed around.

queenofthepirates Wed 25-Nov-15 19:50:31

I get where you're coming from but go gently, he's only seven. Your relationship with him is also important and you're probably both feeling lousy just now. It's okay to fail at some things and sometimes you have to learn lessons rather than being taught them IYSWIM

JiltedJohnsJulie Sat 28-Nov-15 13:46:20

Could you just not leave him to find these things out for himself? Maybe just really praise him when he is putting the effort in?

Whaleshark Sat 28-Nov-15 13:52:01

I think what you said was fine. My DS can be similar, and I won't help him with something if he is not going to try properly, as it is waste of both of our time.

Ickythumpsmum Sat 28-Nov-15 18:56:46

Thanks. We had a similar incident with this weekends maths homework - its ok but a total mess. I did tell him at the start to use a ruler. He hasnt and now im going to let him face the consequences at school instead of letting him do it again. Bah. Hoping he gets the desire to do well first time. Then he would have more time for fun!

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