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2yr old ds seems troubled and don't know why

(4 Posts)
outofpaper Tue 24-Nov-15 00:20:31

Around 3 weeks ago my ds was like a different child -easy going, seemed v happy in the whole.. He used to run into nursery, couldn't wait to get through the doors and gave me a kiss and wave goodbye.
Now every day he clings on to me and cries, sometimes refuses his breakfast (previously never happened). He's much more difficult to get to sleep and he just seems not himself generally. Nothing is ever quite right and he gets upset quite easily.
He has recently moved up to the toddler room at nursery, but I don't think that's it because this all started when he was still in the baby room.
Also I am not too keen on his new key worker I find she is quite cold and non communicative tbh. It's hard to think that she is his main carer 4 days a week.
It's like when I try to talk to her I feel stupid like I am asking silly questions so feel uncomfortable approaching her.
Not really sure how to tackle it, or where to start with putting it right - maybe pull him out? It feels a bit drastic but wondered if anyone had had similar?

outofpaper Tue 24-Nov-15 00:22:33

If it was just a day or 2 I wouldn't be so concerned but it's just that it's been going on for so long and its in such stark contrast to before..

catkind Tue 24-Nov-15 00:48:23

How's his speech, could he tell you if something was bothering him?

If this started 3 weeks ago though and he's just moved rooms - could they already have started doing settling in in the new room with him? Given one big thing has changed, it is hard to dismiss that as a possible cause. Or did any friends move just before him that might have unsettled him?

How is the carer with him and him with her when he gets in in the mornings? How is he when picked up? Some people are bad at dealing with adults but lovely with children, so hopefully it could just be that. On the other hand if he isn't bonding with her he may get moved to a different keyworker, or you could ask for this?

Oh and does he have 2 yr old molars yet? Teeth can still explain a lot of toddler weirdness.

At the end of the day, if he's consistently not liking nursery and you don't need him to be there, I'd pull him out. We moved DS at 3 because the preschool room at his nursery was just not suiting him, it was too big and chaotic. He went to a smaller nursery and was happier there.

outofpaper Thu 26-Nov-15 09:58:11

Thanks for your reply catkind

Things seem to have got a bit better in the last few days. He still gets upset during the handover at the nursery door, but otherwise he seems much happier with me, generally, and I'm told by his key worker that he is happy during the day at nursery.

That was very useful your comment about communication because he is actually quite good at that for his age so I have been trying to 'talk' to him IYKWIM! And he seems to understand the concept of 'later' which is helping ie. 'mummy will pick you up later', and 'more cuddles tomorrow' (when I have trouble getting him down at night) does seem to resonate with him which helps.

He is quite sensitive to change I am not sure if he is more sensitive than most - but that could be the problem. I think he gets quite attached to particular friends and I know one of them left recently and that might have unsettled him a bit..

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