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embarrassing things toddlers say

(27 Posts)
NattyNatural Mon 23-Nov-15 18:24:20

I was outside the super market putting my 2.5 year old in a trolley and he points to a dwarf guy next to me and says 'mummy look! It's a little man!' I wanted to die.
He was really sweet about it and said he was very clever to notice that at his age.
Thank god!

Anyone else been a situation that there little ones have made you want to run and hide?

rach2713 Mon 23-Nov-15 20:18:48

I was in town with my son who was 2 and in his pram and we use to play a game where I would say start and stop to go fast or slow in his pram to stop him being bored not taken any notice there was a group of young girls out side a shop showing off in front of a group of boys and all you hear from my son who couldn't say his 's' properly was TARTS just as we walked past them I almost died but the young boys found it funny lol

Greaterthanthesumoftheparts Mon 23-Nov-15 20:24:44

We had a family weekend away this week and DSIL brought her new GF with her and her 3 year old son. When we got home there was snow everywhere and it was cold, as he got out of the car he said really loudly 'what the fuuuuuuckkkkkk' which was interesting as he was Danish and didn't actually speak any other English! I had to laugh but his mum was really embarrassed, particularly since it was also in front of DFIL.

NotSoFancyNancy Mon 23-Nov-15 20:24:38

Dd1 shouting out "cock"at top of her voice when she spotted a picture of a hen in sainsburys. Took her ages to manage cockle doodle do!

Dd2 in supermarket yesterday upset because " her bum was stuck". Her nappy needed to be adjusted lol!

NattyNatural Mon 23-Nov-15 21:45:23

Rach123 I just lol at Tarts!!

rach2713 Mon 23-Nov-15 21:49:14

Lol I did once I had realised what he had said was more funny cuz the girls didn't know what to do lol

youlemming Tue 24-Nov-15 13:00:15

OH hates having to take DD1 to the loo when out as she's very vocal about what others might be doing.

She also had an issue saying her f's which would come out as S's, the best was when she saw the flags laying on the sidelines at our rugby club ready to be put up and shouted "look at those lazy slags"!!!!

NattyNatural Tue 24-Nov-15 13:11:56

Great one you!

DreamingOfThruxtons Tue 24-Nov-15 13:24:04

I took my daughter to a car boot sale. She loved In The Night Garden, but at only about 20 months was unable to say the names properly.

As we were walking past a stall, she spotted a Makka Pakka toy, and pointed at it, shrieking 'Mucky Paki! Mucky Paki!' just as an apparently Pakistani-origin family wandered into the path of her fat little pointing finger.

Ouch. blush

MingZillas Tue 24-Nov-15 13:27:30

Ooh I love these threads! My dd is 16 mo and not talking yet but I know there'll be some corkers in the future.

HeyMicky Tue 24-Nov-15 13:31:52

New village. New toddler group. Potential new friends. Toilet right next to the play room, not that soundproof. I have a quick wee when I take DD (2.10 at the time), and DD hollers, "Mummy, why do you have such a hairy bottom?"

SiegeofEnnis Tue 24-Nov-15 13:38:41

Where do I start? The classic one at pre-school, doing a show and tell thing on getting up, where the teacher said something like 'What do your mummy and daddy say first thing in the morning?' To which my 3year old said 'Mummy says "Oh, Jesus!"' Which, yes, I had said the day before when I realised we had slept through the alarm. blush

Same three year old, to a toddler music group plus parents after he had just accompanied me to the loo during my period: 'My mummy has a magic Pagino [vagina] that makes things disappear!'

NattyNatural Tue 24-Nov-15 13:39:01

grin Micky

rallytog1 Thu 26-Nov-15 16:49:30

Whenever I take 2yo dd to the toilet with me she always asks loudly, "mummy, do you need me to help you wipe your bum?".

She also likes loudly pointing out other people's boobs and bums in the swimming pool changing rooms blush eg "that lady's got her boobs on".

NattyNatural Wed 30-Dec-15 20:59:55

Just to add another one!

My son told my mil today that she had a smelly bum! She wasn't even in the bathroom or letting off any steam wink
Cheeky monkey

Hopelass Wed 30-Dec-15 21:04:43

DS aged just two at the time saw a woman sunbathing topless on holiday pointed and yelled "BOOBS!" at the top of his voice when she turned over blush it was the hotel pool so we couldn't avoid her, and all the other guests who heard were sniggering blush

Squeegle Wed 30-Dec-15 21:07:39

hopelass gringrin

TeaPleaseLouise Wed 30-Dec-15 21:17:55

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NattyNatural Wed 30-Dec-15 21:20:43

Tea grin

HJBeans Mon 04-Jan-16 18:13:10

My 2yo DS quite often shouts out, in an oh-for-the-love-of-god tone of voice, as we approach the booze section of the supermarket: "No mummy! NO WINE!!!" Even more embarrassing now I'm heavily pregnant. Does it for his dad, too, and we've no idea why - he's never seen us drunk or witnessed any wine-related mishaps.

hawaiibaby Mon 04-Jan-16 21:41:47

grin these are so funny. Love 'hairy bum' and 'slags' especially.

2 yo DS said to me at a play date the other week, 'Mummy's got her willy out!' WTF? He then laughed like it was some naughty secret. We had been potty training and talking about who did and didn't have willys though, in his (slight) defence... it clearly hadn't sunk in very well!

NattyNatural Mon 04-Jan-16 21:52:38

grin Hawaii love it

Andcake Mon 04-Jan-16 21:57:18

I am still reeling from toddler ds walking up to a lady in swimming pool changing rooms as she was drying herself and shouting 'look no willy mummy' and gesticulating towards her...he also used to say cock nested of chocolate which led to lots of shouting 'I want cock'

ginmakesitallok Mon 04-Jan-16 21:59:35

Not toddler, 6 year old yesterday in changing room at swimming pool. "Mum, you've got wrinkly nipped, really wrinkly nipples" ok, just get dressed "but mum you do - YOU HAVE OLD LADY NIPPLES!! "

DD (3.7), bedtime this evening. She is as always, trying to avoid sleep. Hand comes out, starts stroking my face.
Her - Mummy you've got a beard!
Me - Quiet please, go to sleep.
Her - But mummy, you've got a beard LIKE DADDY!
Me - Go to sleep. (Grabs hand)
Her - Mummy, your face is spiky.
Me - <mutters darkly> Thanks for pointing that out.

She's commented on it before. Usually loudly, in public.

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