please help with colic(29 Posts)
Please help! At the end of my rope after 4 hours of incessant crying and potentially another night of no sleep due to constant screaming. Those who had DCs with colic how long did it last and did anything make it better?
My youngest had it until I was advised to put her on comfort baby milk. It was brilliant stuff but a bit more expensive. good luck...it will get easier
Thanks surprise, I'm breastfeeding, not sure if this is making it worse!
Ah no wonder you're tired! I wanted to breastfeed but just couldn't do it so ended I up with a hungry baby and a useless feeling! It may pass wit out action but might be worth calling your health visitor. Hope it improves
It got better about 8 weeks. Sorry if this feels ages away
The only thing that stopped the colic crying with my DS was to wear him in a stretchy wrap sling and sort of swing and bounce him. His crying would start around 8pm and finish up between 11pm and midnight so was survivable.
White noise, go out for a drive, take turns dealing with baby so you both get chance for a break from the screaming. I feel for you, it's hellish, but it does get easier. For us it was a gradual process, but I'd say from 4 months the colic was gone.
Wow so it really could be anywhere between 8 weeks and 16 weeks? God I'm praying for 8! It's generally 4 hours solid a night at the moment and it's pretty full on! Tried pedalling legs, Tummy massage, infacol. Now looking at Colief, cranial therapy, gripe water - I will consider anything! HV suggested Colief
Read about the fourth trimester. It will not solve the colic issue but it might make you understand it a bit more.
It will pass. Make sure they are getting enough sleep in the day. First sign of tiredness encourage a nap.
Thanks little bear, yeah I've read up on fourth trimester and I do totally get it and agree with keeping baby close and mimicking the womb. But I hate seeing her in pain and she's struggling to pass stools too during these episodes, tonight's has gone on for 5 hours and it's very intense, I just want to know if there is any way to reduce her discomfort
Have you tried the sleeping tiger pose? Lay baby tummy down over your arm with arms and legs dangling either side . The pressure seems to alleviate the tummy ache. Worked a treat with mine when they were little.
I feel your pain OP as had this with both DCs. It's very upsetting for everyone but it does pass. The best thing I found was using this each night. It definitely calmed DS2 and allowed trapped air out. Just wished I had known about it for DS1.
Thanks purple, yeah we've tried that but to no luck :-( thank you though :-) ah ok, how does that bucket differ from a baby bath?
Both of my DCs hated the baby bath and screamed the house down at bath time, but DC2 loved being in the tummy tub, as it is enclosed, kinda like the womb in shape and the baby feels more secure than in a normal, open baby bath. And because of the shape the baby can, gently, bounce in the tub (as long as you are holding them correctly). Moving the legs up and down helps release trapped wind. DC2 made lots and lots of bubbles in the tub.
I feel your pain and it will pass. I read about 4th trimester and I concluded it was a developmental thing. There was absolutely nothing we could do to cure it. It stopped as suddenly as it started if its any consolation. We spent approx 4 hours every night from 7-11 at our wits end.
The first night it happened we rushed her to hospital as we thought something was REALLY wrong. They diagnosed reflux, but I couldn't get gaviscon into her. I spoke to the doctor on the Monday and he prescribed carobel - again, impossible in a 5 week old breastfed baby - she gagged on it. I spoke to the health visitor then, who referred me to a breastfeeding specialist and a breastfeeding support group, and we ascertained it wasn't reflux, or silent reflux, but colic. And then we tried everything to make it easier on all 3 of us until it passed.
I found it was lesser if she'd had a good sleep in the afternoon, 2-2.5 hours on me, or on my mum so she felt skin, warmth etc.
Various things helped press the pause-button while it was in progress, over the shoulder, Tiger pose, classical music, the noise of a fan, walking in the pram, driving, going outside into the cooler night air, being naked, swinging DD in her carseat, gently bouncing her in the bouncer, white noise, the mobile over the cot, walking around, darkness, a bright light, sitting on the toilet with her while DH took a shower, or just with the shower running. omg I tried EVERYTHING.
I didn't find infacol any use, and while DD did far in the middle of the crying, I think that was coincidental, a consequence of all the exertion. I don't believe it was bubbles in her tummy.
It was heartbreaking hearing her cries echo off my breast as I tried to put her on. Don't stop breastfeeding, I'm sure you're doing great and I'm sure your child is getting enough - weight gain okay? Plenty of wet nappies etc?
We found that in order to "break the spell" we had to get her to sleep before it was due to happen or as soon as possible onto it - by whatever means possible. This is excruciating if you're used to feeding to sleep, but it had to happen for us. DH might drive and I'd sit in the back with her, we'd have BBC world service or classical music on the radio. If she'd sleep for 30 mins, she'd "reset" and take a big feed and calm down. If not, rinse, repeat until she's calm.
It took its toll on us, and I read an article about parents suffering PTSD afterwards! Make sure you're taking turns, and taking a break, I did the bulk of it as DH really couldn't cope and we ended up fighting or silent treatment when DD had finally gone back to sleep.
If I needed a few minutes to myself, DH would hold her with his earphones on, or I'd lay her safely in the cot, pee, have a drink of water (build up the milk for when the craziness stops), go outside to cool down etc. I'd hold her and put the telly on and read the subtitles to concentrate on something else and stay calm, all the while shhhhhing and swaying and rocking and loving her, even though it was deafening and heartbreaking! Don't be ashamed to walk away for a minute - the crying will happen regardless. I would never let her cry it out, but 2 mins will save your sanity. And remember while you're holding your sweaty, bawling baby, there will be an end to it this evening - even it it's 4 hours away, it won't go on forever tonight or indefinitely - she will sleep later, and she'll grow out of it, and soon you'll be on to the challenges of teething or something else!
PM me if you want to chat
The problem with colic is that there's nothing really that will solve it except time.
I really do understand where you are coming from and it's horrible. DD did the same and then suddenly she stopped. There was no reason for this except she got older.
It will pass.
Oh, and about the poop. Breastfed babies don't get constipated, my DD didn't struggle to poop, but her poop routine changed the same time as the colic started - the breastfeeding specialist said this was just coincidental, but I looked for patterns in everything. In the first 4-5 weeks you have a mini - poop on every nappy, but then they hold on to it for longer, it's normal to go 10 days between poops. DD'S max was 3 days, and it was massive and green (cue panic). It was just because it had been in there a while (not for foremilk imbalance as she always drained at least one breast). Don't doubt yourself about the breastfeeding - get some support if you can xx
I second the "reset" theory. Sometimes worked for us (and I called it the same thing)
Colic really is the pits and, yes, it will pass, but reading that doesn't help at all whilst you're living it. It feels neverending.
You are doing a great job. Walk away for break when needed. As pp said, unfortunately baby will scream regardless. It's really important that you are strong enough to deal with it. I used to do things that needed doing after an hour of screaming: DS screamed for 1 hour, I put him down and did the dishes. DS screamed for another hour, I put him down and fed the dog etc.
Actually doing something that needed to get done was the key for me. It gave me a break from holding a screaming baby, but had a fixed timeframe. Sitting on the stairs with head in hands for a breather doesn't work. Every second feels like an hour. 5 mins doing dishes feels purposeful and goes more quickly. My DS usually started around 4ish and went on for about 4 hours. DH gets home at 7.30 (and was crap with it anyway). If you're flying solo, you really need the breaks.
Cranial osteopathy helped a little, but wasn't a cure. Thankfully colic only lasted for about 8 weeks with us. An acquaintance whose daughter had terrible long lasting colic bought one of those spectacular mechanical rocker/bouncers. Baby loved it and she didn't feel so bad putting her in it when she needed a break.
Sorry havent read yhe full thread but try:
Tiger tree hold
Driving up and down the m25
God these replies are really helping me, I'm starting to realise there is no magic solution and we just have to put up and hope it passes sooner but it does help to know we're not alone and that other people have been through it. Fingers crossed there is light at the end of the tunnell! (Long tunnel, she is currently only 2 weeks old!) x
Is there a Chiropractor or Osteopath in your area? Sometimes it can be due to irritation nerves that tell tummy how to work. The reason Colic is so common is that an adult spine an "S" curve but a baby's is a "C". The apex of the C is right ere the tummy nerves are. It magically goes away as the spine develops and the pressure is reduced, but in the mean time is its really bad a gentle adjustment of the spine can dramatically help :-)
Wow WSM, I'm looking into chiropractors and cranial as so many ppl recommend it but didn't know the facts behind it, that's fascinating, thanks for sharing!
Oh ladypug, I feel for you. Ours went away gradually, was much better after 12 weeks, and died off properly at 16 weeks. It probably was one of the hardest things I ever had to go through but IT WILL pass eventually and you'll appreciate your little one even more after it.
My best tips for the baby:
Get a sling (Close Caboo was brilliant as easy to put on/adjust), put the white noise on (get a phone app), pop the baby in and bounce on an exercise ball
Cranial osteopathy did help a bit we think. He had lots of tension in his neck and head and the CO helped relieve this. We suspect his colic was down to a headache, but we will never know for sure. Worth a try! it's about £40 a session and we had 3.
Find your closest Baby Cafe and speak to BF consultant there, really helped me to get him fed despite the screaming! I would feed him immediately after his nap, while still half asleep, in a dark room and this meant he was relaxed for the feed and fed well.
My best tips for you:
Get out of the house - those days felt insanely long. If you can be busy doing things each day, this will help the weeks to pass. I would go round to a friends or drive drive drive. He would scream regardless but meant I wasn't going stir crazy indoors
Have a shower. Put the baby down safely somewhere (they will be screaming but they would be anyway) or try and get up before they wake and get in the shower! Treat yourself to some expensive body scrub and it will feel like spa heaven! Really made me feel so refreshed.
Ask for help. My sister would come around and just bounce with the baby, or take it for a walk. It was absolute heaven for me.
Don't feel guilty if you hate this phase and wish you were back at work(!), there is much more happiness and blissful baby time ahead I promise
Looking back, my regrets were that I didn't ask for more help, and wish I'd asked my husband to take a week or so off work. You need all the support you can but I'm terrible at asking for help.
Stay strong, you are doing great x
Thank you Vanoose, some great suggestions there and some lovely moral support. According to the average timescales I'm 25% of the way through it so that's something! I've also just ordered a close caboo :-)
Interestingly, I just saw a bf counsellor and she believes my problem is oversupply/hyperlactation and that having too much milk is causing the colic issues so I'm looking into this now! X
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