Why won't she sleep?(4 Posts)
DD is 4 months old (19 weeks).
Her sleep was: 7:30pm feed, 8/9pm asleep, 2/3am feed (fed then asleep straightaway), 6/7am awake. Something has gone wrong and it is making me quite teary and useless because sleep for either of us isn't happening.
She always goes to sleep on the sofa and we transfer her to her cotbed at our bedtime at 10:30pm. We do this because she just didn't settle in her cotbed, even when cuddled to sleep.
Now she is thrashy and jerky with whingy cries after her 7:30pm feed. She is difficult to get to sleep and falls asleep eventually by 9pm. She now wakes on moving her to her cotbed and at 11pm/midnight she wants a feed. But afterwards, she will not be put down in her cotbed. She 'conforms' in my arms immediately and 'sleeps' but wakes on being put down and gets thrashy and jerky as though she is cross. I eventually go to bed between 1:30am and 2:30am but am woken up again by 4:30am - 5:30am wanting another feed! Again, she will not resettle. I am totalling 4-5 hours of broken sleep between 10:30pm and 7am!
Her daytime naps have never been great. 15-40 minute cat-naps - up to 8 a day if very short and I have struggled to tease her into less but longer naps of 1-1.5 hours. On odd occasions (mainly when her night time sleep has been so shite - like last night!) she has had 3-4 naps of between 30 mins and 2 hours long. Today she slept for 2.5 hours during nap 2!
I don't know what to do about the nights though. Her days ar pretty erratic too! I have a DS aged 3 and he is being neglected because of his highly demanding sister. I feel so guilty and useless. Parenting seems so much harder with DD than with DS that I fear I am doing something wrong.
She wakes up beaming and playful in the morning but after that first nap, everything goes downhill from there. She is currently draped over my legs ATM and dare not move for fear of waking her!
She is not hot, not in any visable pain nor is she hungry as she took 6oz 1.5 hours ago. But she is worryingly thrashy and jerky whilst being cross about something at the same time.
Sounds like classic 4 month sleep regression. She is very effectively training you to hold her whilst she sleeps. This is because she loves you and you are lovely and warm and snuggly.
There are a bunch of different opinions about what to do next. I'd advise you read The No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantly and The Contented Baby by Gina Ford. They are two quite opposing methods for dealing with sleep problems and you will probably find something in between that works for you.
Its miserable. You are not alone. You will get through it
Sleep regression? There was a thread about this recently, let me see if I can find if...
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