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Behaviour/development

ADHD toddler or normal behaviour? Or something else? Help me please wise mumsetters!!

8 replies

Brightonmumtoatoddler · 12/06/2015 09:49

Hello,
Just looking for some opinions as I'm curious/ slightly worried about my toddlers behaviour. I wasn't, until I saw a thread about adhd where they said their toddler never stopped wriggling. Neither does mine!
I spend a lot of time with other toddlers her age (2.3) and I'm always struck by how calm and still they are in comparison. My friends little girl sat completely still on my lap for half an hour the other day watching cartoons. I was amazed! That's never happened with my daughter! She barely notices the TV and will just constantly roam around the room playing or dancing. If she sits on my lap she's constantly fidgeting, wriggling and squirming. Never still for a second. Same as when she was a baby. Constantly squirming and very uncuddly.
However she does other things which seem fine: She sleeps (and has always slept) and naps extremely well, hits her milestones when she should, she rarely has tantrums, pays attention to instructions, will focus on playing with her toys for a reasonable amount of time (5-10mins), eats healthy food (no E numbers) and is a happy, sociable and helpful child. She will sit and read books with me for half an hour at night, is focussed and interested but of course the whole time she's wriggling and fidgeting.
I'm utterly bewildered. Any thoughts?
Ps: I don't really understand all the mumset DD OP IYSWIM etc acronyms can we just do plain English please for this old fashioned fuddy duddy!!!

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Trooperslane · 12/06/2015 11:37

Sounds like mine and totally normal.

apart from the tantruming

She's 22 months.

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NeedAScarfForMyGiraffe · 12/06/2015 12:20

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BertieBotts · 12/06/2015 12:30

I really think that you can't diagnose ADHD in toddlers - they are all attention deficit and hyperactive, that's how toddlers are supposed to be! :) It would be like diagnosing a speech delay in a newborn.

I think she sounds normal, active, curious and lovely :) Don't worry. Some children are just more/less active than others. Perhaps she'll be sporty later on.

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Brightonmumtoatoddler · 13/06/2015 12:31

Hello, thank you for your feedback. She actually is starting nursery next week so I'll see what they say, that's a good point.
I know it's too easy to diagnose anything and it's much more likely to be just normal toddler behaviour and as I said I wasn't worried especially before, I just thought I'd see if anyone had any thoughts or insight as I'm a first time mum and can only compare her to her calmer peers!

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BertieBotts · 13/06/2015 12:57

My son is active and fidgety too. I also look at calm toddlers with total amazement, because I don't remember him ever being like that. In my NCT group, there were two children like that - mine and one other! It was quite embarrassing because it always seemed like the others were much better behaved, but later on, yes DS (dear son) can be wild sometimes but he is not cruel, he is not malicious and he does try to put things right. I'm glad of those things whereas some of the children who were calmer when little can be more manipulative. It's just different aspects of their personality (and yes, there were active/boisterous toddlers who are violent and boisterous as 6 year olds too, and calm quiet kids who stayed calm and quiet and nice, I don't mean to say it's representative.)

When she starts nursery, she'll be in a bigger group with a whole range of children, and you'll probably find she's not the most active or the most fidgety. Smaller groups can give a skewed impression.

She sounds very much like DS was when he was younger, he still talks non stop and doesn't sit still.

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WorldsBiggestGrotbag · 13/06/2015 13:11

She sounds a lot like my 19 month old, except she doesn't sleep either. I've had similar concerns if I'm honest but mainly just think that she's a toddler, that's what they do. She is literally constantly on the go, the only time she sat still for more than 5 mins was when she had a really severe case of hand, foot and mouth and her temperature was 40 degrees.
I find the best thing to do is exercise her like a dog and give up on the idea of calm, peaceful play times! Apparently I was similar as a toddler and I don't have ADHD or anything similar.

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Funkytown · 13/06/2015 13:17

sounds like mine he's 16 months
except
he screams all the time ,talks loud ,always moving ,doesn't cuddle, hits others and himself head bangs, spins in circles and doesn't sleep Envy

according to the health visitor its normal ..... we shall see

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Brightonmumtoatoddler · 14/06/2015 08:57

Awwww isn't this site wonderful? It never ceases to amaze me how nice strangers are to take the time to write to you to help and reassure. Thank you! Some really interesting replies and a lot of food for thought.
As I said I'm not going out of my mind with worry or anything, for the most part I'm really happy with her behaviour and people often comment on how well behaved and polite she is which I love, so I feel lucky that she is the way she is. It was just that one comment about adhd child that got me worried!
Bertie - really interesting way to look at it in terms of personality structure, I'd prefer her this way to calm but spiteful! (NOT that they always go hand in hand obvs)
Funky- sorry to hear about your little one, maybe get a second opinion? That sounds quite distressing.

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