Toddler question- need advice please(4 Posts)
Hello I would really appreciate your advice. My loving and beautiful 20 month old daughter has this week become a terror out of the blue. She has started biting herself and others, smacking, tantrums and running away, answer to everything is NO! I don't know what to do at all I feel this needs to be handled swiftly and effectively but I'm after advice from others who will know better than me as this is our first child.
I am also really fretting that this behaviour will continue at nursery and I worry for the other children I would hate her to hit or bite another child I am so worried. Please help!
Thanks in advance x
You are not alone! I've heard of previously amazing little angels turning into little irrational terror monsters over night! Unless you have the most unique little placid angel EVER, i think this happens at some point to every parent (queue the smug interjections of "well mine has NEVER hit another child" etc).
Think of adults. Even adults can hit out when their anger gets the best of them. Now take a little human that has yet to learn about emotions let alone how to control them, who doesn't understand that they might be feeling frustrated because of hunger/tiredness etc and so expresses that emotion by lashing out. They cant' even communicate linguistically properly yet! It's our job as parents to help them through this, though GOD knows how bloody hard it is! Just keep at it. My son (now 23 months) is much, much better though I expect it will be at least another year or more until he's a different, happier little human.
I would be swift, firm and consistent, but understand that this IS a phase and eventually at some point it will pass, but you have to be firm in your discipline etc. Also I would helicopter over them if you go to soft play/toddler groups etc, as they could hurt other kids which obviously isn't cool for the other kid, and can also result in the other parent lashing out at you for it.
They are also very used to this kind of behaviour at nursery and are trained to deal with it there (this is what I keep telling myself as my own son is due to start soon and I'm scared he might get hungry and snatch a toy or something), and of course continuation of discipline at home helps. Parents of children who have yet to do this (or are the very rare ones that never have) can NEVER understand the embarrassment and awfulness of your kid hurting another. they also tend to be very judgemental about it, and often nasty, thinking you MUST be a bad parent etc if your kid hits out.
Thanks so much for your advice and comments, they were very reassuring!
Today has been a very good day, interestingly not allowed any squash only all natural foods and water. A good result xx
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