Gipson managing a 15 year old boy

[Rhymerocket]

It's gonna be a long half term. My 15 yr old lives half time with me and half time with his father. Has been this way for 6 years.
His father treats him as his best mate. They swear and slag people off and generally be "lads" together. The result is my son now has very little nice to say about anyone. His father is God and he is becoming very difficult when he is at my house. I have 2 other younger children (2 and 3) ISO not want them to see how the older lad speaks to me. He is rude and downright abusive at times. He is only nice when he wants something otherwise he sits in his room the whole time. I recently put parental controls on the Internet to turn it off between 10 at night and seven in the morning as I caught him on YouTube at 1 am on a school night. He's furious about this and last night had a mighty row about it. When I told him he would not be going to his girlfriends today. He told me he's going and I can't stop him.

I really don't know what to do with him. His father is no support I left him for being emotionally abusive and my partner can't get through to him either. Should I ask my father (his grandfather) to have a word?

Please help.

[42isnottheanswer]

Does he like and respect his grandfather? If you think he will listen to him, it's worth a try. DS didn't really speak to us from age 14 to 16/17. It does get better but it's really hard being disrespected in your own home.

[Rhymerocket]

I think his grandfather will get through to him. I just don't feel like I know him anymore. So I don't know.

[42isnottheanswer]

Well it would be worth a try then, wouldn't it?
If your dad talks in terms of him being more respectful to you not only as DSs mother but also as his daughter, that might help. I once had words with my niece about how I felt when I heard her being awful to her mum. That seemed to make her listen more than any comments from her own parents. Teenagers who seem to acknowledge nothing said by their DPs, are often more bothered by how they're seen by others.