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3 children still not dry at night

(14 Posts)
jerin Sun 04-Jan-15 05:49:03

Arghhhhhh I'm exhausted by it, all 3 children are still wetting the bed every night. DS is 7 and B/G DTs are 6. DD is dry most nights but the boys....... None will wake for the toilet. DS7 will wet up to 3 times a night. I have an alarm but he either removes it or sleeps through it. We've tried lifting him but he won't go, seems too asleep.
DD is the only one that will wake if she has an accident, the boys just sleep on soaked.
I just seem to spend all day, every day washing bedding. None of them will wear pull ups. We are wanting to go on holiday but it's impossible.
How do I best tackle this? DS7 is by far the worst but how can I put him in pants at night when his younger brother and sister aren't? He is so sensitive and he says he tries hard.

Nandocushion Sun 04-Jan-15 05:53:35

Our DS7 is the same and everyone has told us that it is hormonal, and we just have to wait. I am sympathetic - he seems so ready, but can't wake up.

AutumnHaze Sun 04-Jan-15 06:04:47

Wake them all up before you go to bed (assume 10-11pm) and take them to the toilet. Make sure they are fully awake and pee. Turn tap on, the sound might help. Hope it helps.

Goingintohibernation Sun 04-Jan-15 06:26:55

I think for now you need to insist on pull ups. They shouldn't be getting the option to refuse to wear them. It can't be good for them laying in soaking wet sheets every night and it is no good for you having to constantly wash them.

AuditAngel Sun 04-Jan-15 07:06:46

Once children reach 8 you can ask for a referral to the enuresis clinic (in our house known as the "wee" clinic)

The advice we received was as follows (if I can remember it all):

1. drink 8 small cups of water a day (we worked 7 into our routine) rather than sipping from a water bottle during the day. This helps to train the bladder muscles.

2. Last drink 1.5 hours before bedtime. Last drink not to be milk as the fat content makes it more likely they will wee in the night.

3. No blackcurrant drinks or drinks containing caffeine.

4. Two weeks at bedtime. So one wee when they start getting ready for bed. Last thing before turning out the light is a second wee.

5. If they do have an accident. It is their responsibility to help strip and remake the bed. This is to do with them taking responsibility for their bodies. This is something only they can do,

At the stage we visited the clinic DS had only had 2 dry nights. Phew has never drunk much, almost nothing in the daytime so would then drink a lot in the evening, and wee it all out at night! He would often flood the pull ups, and never woke up.

We had 3 appointments at the clinic, about 2 weeks apart, and after 3 he was termed as dry. He is now 10, and I think we have had one accident in the last year. He stripped the bed and showered, before he came and woke me to help him remake the bed.

If you have any questions, please ask.

I also gave a daughter 2.5 years younger, and had not taken her out of pull ups to make him feel worse about himself. As soon as we asked for the referral, I took her into owners, she was fine, just lazy. Incidentally, within 2 weeks IV being dry, DD2 (then 2) refused to wear pull ups St night. I can think if only 3 or 4 accidents in 2 years.

AuditAngel Sun 04-Jan-15 07:08:11

Sorry, number 4 should be 2 wees at bedtime.

jerin Sun 04-Jan-15 07:18:51

Thanks for your replies.... We had been lifting them but felt DD probably didn't need it. She us normally dry but thinking about it she has relapsed over the school holidays a bit. DS2 who is 6 is also usually dry, but will happily go to the toilet when woken. Me and DP both work shifts so time of waking would be random (and whilst helps with the washing I'm not sure it really helps with getting them dry?)
So back to basics..... How are you supposed to get children dry at night? When do you take the pants off? If I put DD back in pants she will lie in bed and wet them each morning instead of getting up. DS2 will probably just get up and take them off anyway and DS1 usually soaks them through. How have others tackled this with twins/triplets/ children the same age but different needs, all in the same room?
DS2 just shrugs stuff off, he doesn't really care. DS1 will worry and over think everything. Which is the main reason I left it so long before taking DTs out of pants, hoping he'd catch up.

jerin Sun 04-Jan-15 07:28:50

AuditAngel I crossed posts with you - thank you so much. DS1 was under clinic for poo holding and we were supposed to move onto bed wetting. My follow up was supposed to be a year ago but as usual, with my hospital, appointments never get sent out. As he overcame his poo problem I hoped the other would follow. I think I'll call and try to get an appointment for him.

Many of the things you've said I try already, but I'll be more strict. They rarely drink after 5pm, 7pm bedtime. They always wee before bed and both boys will usually wee again after reading (I'll try to enforce this more)
I'll get them competing to drink more at school and although I have some at the moment, I won't buy red cordials (don't often anyway) again. I'll get them helping with the changing of the bed. I already make them
Change themselves and ensure they are fully awake.

PrincessAnnaOfArundale Wed 07-Jan-15 14:08:24

My 7 year old DS is same. He sleeps so deeply. I try to wake him up when I go up to bed at about 11 but it's impossible to wake him. He's so drowsy and won't/ can't wee even if I carry him to the bloomin toilet!

He doesn't drink much during the day though. I really think he needs to drink more throughout the day rather than a big drink with tea and before bed. Getting him to drink more in the day is proving to be more difficult than you'd think though! Can't control what he does or doesn't drink all day at school.

Poor DS, I feel sorry for him because he genuinely doesn't want to wet the bed still and he's embarrassed he still has to wear pull ups but he's never ever had a dry night. He's particularly aware of it because his 3 year old brother has become dry at night and he's feeling very sensitive about the whole issue sad.

nobutreally Wed 07-Jan-15 14:20:58

DS is 10, and still regularly wet - dd has been dry since she potty trained about 2.5years. We've similar advice as auditangel, except not the bed-changing one (ds is in a bunk bed, so not realistic anyway, but I'd feel slightly uncomfortable that this would feel like a punishment, for something that he can't help)

Fizzy drinks are another no-no, and we were told NOT to lift, however tempting, as it doesn't help their development. Once they hit 8 (I think it's still too 'normal' for you to get a referal at 7) the 'wee clinic' is helpful - and you can also consider desmopressin - a nightly tablet which supresses wee production. DS has used both routinely, and for special occasions (eg school overnights/cub camps etc)

More practically, we double-sheet the bed - so a mattress protector, then sheet, then another matress protector, then another sheet. In the middle of the night, makes it easier to peel off the top layer & bed is ready again.

Worth remembering (& stressing to your sons) this is hormonal - so not something that the child themselves can control. DS is very chilled about it, and has never had any teasing from his mates (many of whom he has told!)

Oh - and my two shared a room when they were younger - dd never woke up when ds woke wet - but tbh, he rarely wakes - just wakes in the morning in a pool of wee ;-) He wore nighttime pullups for a long time after she was out - I just told them both different people have different needs, no drama. They joke that she has a bladder of steel...

nobutreally Wed 07-Jan-15 14:23:15

ERIC is a great source of info:

jerin Sat 10-Jan-15 18:58:11

Thanks for these son never wakes when he wees, not until the morning. He'll often be wet by the time we go to bed and we get him up to change him. His brother never stirs,
He's had the alarm on the past few nights. The second night he woke soon after falling asleep, as the alarm went off but I'm guessing he wasn't in a deep sleep at that time.
He's feeling uncomfortable as both his brother and especially his sister are dry. I've managed to negotiate him back to pull ups, with the alarm (silly me, the alarm wasn't working because he needed to pull ups too!) and so I'm hoping it'll work. Meanwhile ive left a message to try and get an appointment at the wee clinic.

3littlefrogs Sat 10-Jan-15 19:03:38

This may well be related to the poo-holding.
Are you sure you have got that sorted? It can take years.

Have a look at the ERIC website. Lots of useful advice and information there.

Also - have you made sure they haven't got thread worms? This can also cause bed wetting, especially in girls.

jerin Sat 10-Jan-15 21:25:13

Yes, I'm sure it's all related. He was very slow out of nappies and even now has accidents. He still isn't completely over the poo-holding but is so much better. The other day I could see he needed to go, told him to and off he went. Sometimes he will just shout that he's going. We're definitely going in the right direction. Our poo clinic appointment was 18 months ago so it's certainly taking time.
I'll have a look at the website - thanks for that and look into the possibility of thread worms...

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