4 month old silly feeding silly sleeping - help!!

[Bumbershoot]

DD is now 4mo and recently entirely formula fed due to major allergies, reflux and failing to thrive. She's been playing silly buggers with feeding and sleeping...

Basically I feed her every 3 hours or so during the day but she won't take more than 100mls at a time (about 3oz), then at night she feeds at 11ish and 2.30ish, and is now waking just before 6 apparently ravenous. I've been trying to stretch her till 6.30ish as she doesn't get upset - but then when the bottle comes she won't take it!

She's happy with the formula (Neocate), so that's not an issue, and we've tried faster teats with no real results. I don't think the bottles can be the problem as annoyingly for the night feeds she'll take up to 140mls (just under 5oz)! For the same reason I don't think it can be discomfort with being full. We partly have an issue with keeping her attention for daytime feeds as she is extremely distractible, and at night when she's sleepy she'll take far more without realising it.

Anyway... She's now back to 50th centile weight and seems to be maintaining it so far. If we hadn't had the health issues and poor weight gain I'd be limiting night feeds/giving water but I'm worried about restricting calorie intake and her getting poorly again. I've tried to get her to take more in the day but obviously can't force her, and it already takes an hour of offering the bottle on and off to get the 100mls in.

So - what would you do?!

[JellyMould]

I'd keep doing what you're doing - I'm not quite sure what the prob is? If she's gaining weight fine, that's the main thing.

[Babytalkobsession]

Hi, personally at 4 months I'd just go with it. 4 months is a known time for developmental leaps / sleep regression etc you may find in a month it naturally improves.

My nearly 6 month old was doing a very similar pattern at 4 months (every 2 hours at night for a bit) and gradually he's started to space his night feeds to go 6/7 hours at the longest stretch and usually now waking 6:30-7 which is much more manageable!

I wouldn't give water or start reducing feeds just yet, especially as she's just starting to do so well with her weight gain.

I'm sure this phase won't last long, although it does feel like forever! :)

[Bumbershoot]

That's very encouraging I know she's not doing anything totally crazy, just very aware lots of her mates are starting to sleep through etc whereas she seems to think nighttime is prime feeding time. I was also a bit thrown by dietician's suggestion she should be taking about 180mls at a time during the day and remember DS was doing that easily!
So you don't think I should try and get her eating more during the day? Or more at a time?

[Babytalkobsession]

I think there's just so much of the world opening up to them at this age it's too distracting for them! Could you maybe try feeding her in a quiet darkened room when possible? She may take more then if less distraction.

My DS was exactly the same, would be feeding then suddenly have an overwhelming urge to turn his head, usually with nipple still attached!

[Bumbershoot]

Haha yep OUCH! At least we're not dealing with that anymore! Darkened room may well help but have DS at home with us too and we're often out and about so very hard to do in practice. I guess (hope!!) it's just something she'll grow out of.

[Justgotosleepnow]

Just one question- why 'try and stretch' the first morning feed? Surely if you are hungry you eat, so why shouldn't the baby?
If you've had feeding issues and baby is showing signs of wanting milk then why not feed lo?

[PiPoPiddlyPo]

Sounds familiar. I have a very fussy 3 month old feeder except he's breastfed. He had mild lactose intolerance as a newborn (there's lactose in breastmilk too) but think he's being to grow out of that now.

He doesn't feed much at all in the day. I try and feed him every 3 hours but often he's not interested at all, or will just have a few sucks and thats enough to put him on for a few hours.

He's particularly bad when we're out and about, and will often just completely refuse to feed until we get home. He also won't feed when he's too tired or bizzarely too hungry!

On one day he once went 7 hours without feeding, just because we were out. Then when we got home he wouldn't feed because he was too hungry and just screamed the place down!

But yes he still wakes up for 2 feeds in the night, and will then feed quite happily and for much much longer.

But I do find it really bizzare how generally uninterested in feeding he is.

He's also started to drop a bit on the centile charts, but not enough to cause concern.

I'm just going with it TBH, I can't force him to feed if he doesn't want to, and it seems mean to withhold it when he does.

People have told me some babies are just not that into milk, but are better when weaned onto solids so maybe that'll be the case with ours.

[Bumbershoot]

Sounds familiar PiPo! I wonder if they will take to weaning more easily. DD is very curious about everything we're eating but I'm not keen to start early. But yes - with milk feeds she seems to be one of the babies who just isn't hugely interested. Actually since she was born she's never really yelled for a feed and has always happily gone far longer than the "norm" without expressing any desire to eat.

[Bumbershoot]

Just - only because she doesn't show any interest in either of the morning feeds and as she isn't particularly upset by not being fed immediately for the third time in the night I thought it was worth trying to encourage her to eat at getting up time, rather than perpetuating the cycle. Obviously if she's agitated earlier I feed her!

[PiPoPiddlyPo]

DS rarely cries for a feed too, mainly only at night. And even then it's not a cry, more like babbling to let us know he's awake and then a bit of a moan if we ignore him! I usually initiate the daytime feeds. It's funny isn't it, I wonder why they're like this?

My DD was the complete opposite, wanted feeding all day and screamed if she didn't get it straight away. She also never refused a feed, and was at the top of the charts for height & weight. She was a demanding baby in lots of ways though, DS is extremely laid back. What's your DD like personality wise so far?

[Bumbershoot]

Spooky - exactly the same. She's very laid back and generally smiley (despite having had a crap time with severe reflux etc), whereas DS (now 3) is a bit more reserved, ate nonstop as a baby and has steadfastly remained on the 91st centile since the day he popped out!

[Cast1ststone]

I had the same problem with my now 6 month old son. I was flustered and I did find that putting him in a baby chair or something alone with no distractions but the tube would work.When I would try to hold the bottle he would play and not take as much. When I put him in the baby chair and propped the bottle on a blanket he would contently take more. I keep an eye on him to make sure it does not fall out or something like that. I was told by the doctor not to give more than 2 ounces of water a day. The reason is not just not calories but water poisoning. Yes, poisoning. More than that can cause the babies organs to shut down and fail. I am not sure the exact science behind it but it is not recommended. Maybe try a dark room to do feedings in since she eats more at night like you said.

[Cast1ststone]

Once they are 6 months you can up the fluids to 2 to 4 ounces a day but before then just focus on formula. Try more activities during the day to really wear her out. No naps after 7pm. This should help with nights a bit. Make sure she is warm, My baby will wake up now at night if he is chilly at all.