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Magazine for Mummy to style herself - help me

(10 Posts)
Lightminthequeem Fri 04-Apr-14 20:22:59

My lovely DD1, who's 5, has just spent her after bath drawing time (while I settle the baby) painstakingly making me a magazine. Front cover is a woman with a bra and flouncy skirt, inside a woman with a hairbrush, bra, flouncy skirt, chest of drawers with lots of potions and lotions, and then bunk beds marked 'girls' and 'boys'. She says it has information on styles for women, so I can style myself.

I could cry. We don't have any women's magazines in the house because I think they are just confidence destroying advertising bullshit. I don't have any make up, beauty products etc. (perhaps a bit of styling wouldn't go amiss but anyway...). What can I say to her about this? She is developing a very restricted idea of what women's interests are, I think from other children at school. I said that her magazine was lovely, but I didn't like that kind of magazine, I liked ones about movies, or other things.

Every day she tells me something the boys at school don't like because it's too 'girlish' or something the girls don't like because it's something the boys like. How can you counter this kind of bullshit? What do you say?

ZuleikaD Sat 05-Apr-14 07:26:44

It's possible that she's presenting you with this stuff to see what your reaction is. If she's hearing these things at school, she may be aware on some level that it doesn't really fit with they way you act, the things you like and talk about so she's bringing it to you to get a steer on how she should feel about it. So I think there's an opportunity there to widen her ideas of what a woman's interests would be - you can talk about what you would put in a magazine. Maybe even work on one together that better represents the breadth of interests that are open to her.

I do you feel your pain: our daughter comes home and talks about how someone told her dinosaurs 'weren't for girls' or similar nonsense. The only way to counter the bullshit, is really to call it it what it is. Garbage. If she's bringing these designations to you, it's likely that she's seeking your take on it, and at five your opinion is likely to carry more weight than anyone in the playground.

ZacharyQuack Sat 05-Apr-14 07:29:32

You could always talk to her about all the other things in magazines that are interesting. Puzzles, recipes, things to make, pictures of kittens, stories etc. Don't focus on the "style yourself" part, instead focus on the "making a magazine" part.

Dilidali Sat 05-Apr-14 08:12:52

Oh, this is going to be an ongoing 'battle', OP smile
I think designing a magazine is a fab idea for a 5 yo, run with the idea and steer her towards making her own cartoon magazine.
I have been known to 'accidentally' slip those style with stickers books into the recycling bin, or accidentally wash some particularly horrible kittens with crowns tshirts into a 90 degree wash with bleach ( the sodding diamante remained on the garment though), we cut it into pieces and made capes for the toy mice she had.

It was a short spell though.
My take in these things is: the more you 'forbid', the greater the temptation. Just gently 'steer' away offering plenty of alternatives smile

ThreeLannistersOneTargaryen Sat 05-Apr-14 08:25:05

"It was really kind of you to make me a magazine. I'd love it if you could add more sections about other things that a Mummy might be interested in, like films, books, cars, computer games..."

ZuleikaD Sat 05-Apr-14 09:16:03

"...rock-climbing, bicycle repair, dinosaurs, crystals, stargazing, engineering..."

ThreeLannistersOneTargaryen Sat 05-Apr-14 11:34:59

"bell-ringing, sci-fi, music, robots, photography, ice-hockey..."

MiaSparrow Sat 05-Apr-14 11:58:27

Careful, OP, you'll soon have her secretly hiding the "confidence destroying advertising bullshit" from you because she will bloody love it and want to rebel.

Trebla Sun 06-Apr-14 15:49:27

Typical developmental stage. Roll with it and add in the idea of extra chapters. Dont take it personally and celebrate the fact that your daughter has spent all that time thinking of you and making something so beautiful.

Lightminthequeem Sun 06-Apr-14 21:37:13

Thank you all. Mia, yes, I don't want to be too militant and of course am an angry middle aged woman, I loved that stuff as a teenager!

We started making a magazine with more things in it to reflect what the people she knows are interested in, but didn't get very far as had to go out. That is a great idea though, and she seemed keen and drew a woman who fixed broken films and a woman who taught people tennis. So that seemed more rounded!

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